I shouldn't fall for you

23.

Rose's POV:

It's been a month since I've seen the boys but all of them call me every single day to check on me but I was never up for getting on the phone and talking. Ryan and I have hardly spoken but I missed him so much and hated being away from him like this but I needed time to get things together and try to figure this whole him being part of a bicker gang in the past. I was a little scared of the things Ryan had told me that day and I didn't want to think about all the people he killed and the families of the victims of Ryan Nguyen. "Everything ok?" Seungmin and the boys have been staying in my apartment for a week and a half while they were here in L.A for their concert. They had some vlive's to do and some pictures to take on their free time but for the most part they stayed with me and kept me company so that way I wouldn't think about my miscarriage and the gunshot wound. 

"Everything's alright I'm just tired... I was thinking about going to the NSB house and visiting the boys for a little bit. It's been a month since I last seen them and I miss all of them so I wanna try to surprise them especially Ryan since I've been avoiding him more than the others because of everything he told me about his past." Seungmin, Minho, Felix and Han were sitting in the living room with me while Chan, Binnie, Hyunjin and Jeongin were in the kitchen making lunch for everyone except for me because I wasn't hungry.

"After lunch we'll drive you there and I know that it's a short walk just to get there but I don't want you walking to much like that because you're still hurting. I've been monitoring you ever since we got here and I've noticed that you are still in a lot of pain even when you say the pain is only a four or a five." Seungmin said wrapping his arms around me and pulling me closer to him and to be honest it felt nice having all eight of my boys with me but for some reason no matter what's going on around me I can't seem to smile or even feel like I'm happy.

"Thanks guys... you know even though I'm still hurting physically and mentally you guys are still making me happy deep in my heart but I just wish I could feel it." I gave a faint smile and they all just starred at me but I could see that they were hurting and it was killing them to see me this way since I've always been a person her just smiles even when she's hurting.

"Lunch is ready" Chan calls and the boys join them at the kitchen counters and I head to my room and het changed into baggy pants that wouldn't hurt my cut wounds from the surgery.

"Seungmin do you have any hoodies I can wear?" I yelled from my room since I never owned baggy shirts or hoodies but I didn't want anything skin tight to me because I still was hurting.

"Yeah I have one you can wear" Seungmin comes running into my room and grabs a Stray Kids hoodie out of his bag and helps me get changed into it. Seungmin for the past week and a half as been the one to help me change my clothes since I couldn't do much bending nor do much lift so Seungmin has seen me half naked while they were staying here. I didn't really care if it was any of the boys since I've known them for so long and it wasn't like they were seeing me naked I always kept my bra and underwear on.

"Thanks for helping me get changed... again" I sat at my vanity and grabbed my brush but before I could start brushing my hair Seungmin took it from me and started doing my hair himself.

"Of course... I will always be here to help you when you're hurting whether it be physically or emotionally or mentally. I'm here always and forever along with the other boys we won't leave your side until you are better just like when were together in Seoul when we were all trainees and even when we were separated into our industries." Seungmin tied my hair into a pretty messy bun and left my baby hairs down and helped me stand up from my seat and we joined everyone in the kitchen.

"You look nice Rose, Seungmin your hoodie looks like a night gown on her haha" Minho laughed and the other joined in except for me. Everyone finished eating and they helped me out to the cars and of course I rode with Seungmin, Minho, Felix and Han while in the other car their was Binnie, Chan, Jeongin and Hyunjin. We drove for five minutes and reached the NSB house and as soon as I ring the door bell Tyler opens the door with a shocked look on his face and eventually notices the eight boys standing behind me and he lets us in. I see all the NSB's sitting on the couch talking about new challenges and things they should do for their channels and as soon as I clear my throat their eye bolted over to me and the boys.