"let me kiss you hard in the pouring rain, you like your girls insane, so choose your last words, this is the last time"
'cause you and I, we were born to die"
~~~~
fem!oc x finnick odair
pre-hunger games - mockingjay
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
▶️ us - james bay
xv. I'M OUT OF THE WATER AND I'M STILL DROWNING
~~~~
CHANGING OUT OF HER DRESS AND INTO one of the many options of loungewear found in her closet, she admired the room, noticing how it hasn't changed one bit. The bed was still dressed with the same pearly silk and the abstract statue in the corner of the room hadn't changed a bit. Thea wished it had so it didn't remind her of herself before the games because she absolutely loathed who she was now and she missed the old, conceited Thea who only thought about herself. Because when you only worry about yourself, things that happen to others don't affect you as much. Like death, if she hadn't become a Career and she killed Sage when she had the chance, Ash's, Sage's and Amethyst's deaths would be pretty low on her list of things to worry about.
Thea suddenly found it hard to breathe. She ripped off the necklace before stripping out of her clothes and into the shower. Feeling the makeup melt off her was relieving in a sense, but as the water fractured onto her delicate body, it took her back to the games where the rain fell as Sage died in her arms. She was taken back to after the very first interview with Caesar where she had set the shower to the highest temperature, feeling it burn and splinter on her skin. Thea could still feel where Velvet had grabbed her neck, and as she reached to touch it, she let out a sob. The heavy pitter-patter of the shower drowned out her cries as she held her own body, feeling like someone else.
Trembling out, wrapped in a towel, Thea's eyes landed on a pair of scissors on the vanity. She didn't bother to comb her hair out before chopping the fake fiery locks of red onto the floor. It didn't matter to Thea seeing as they were only extensions, but the feeling of short hair was easier to manage, both mentally and physically. The only reason she cut her hair in the arena was so that she knew she was still herself and not being manipulated and controlled by the Capitol. She did it on her own terms.
Thea slipped into the same lounge-wear she had taken out before and stumbled out of the door that whooshed behind her once more. Her legs carried her throughout the train carts, hoping to find her team. Thea liked being alone, that was a fact, but she didn't like being lonely. When you're alone, you choose to isolate yourself, knowing that there will be people there at the end of the day, whereas if she was lonely, she would have nobody to begin with. It was the thought that people had her back that kept Thea going, in all honesty. Hearing laughter over in the next cart, she walked through the door that revealed Soline, Diana, Finnick and Cicero in lounge chairs that huddled around a mahogany table.
Their laughter and conversation died down as they looked at the girl, ushering her to join them. Cicero gasped at her hair theatrically. Thea placed herself in the chair beside Cicero, slightly sinking into it once she heard the topic of conversation. "A toast!" Soline announced, raising her flute of champagne, "To Thea's victory!" Thea didn't feel it was appropriate to toast to a bunch of dead kids, because that is literally the only reason she is on this train back home. But she did so anyways, not wanting to be the killjoy of the group. Thea sourced herself a glass of water, not wanting to drink at the moment and she raised it with the rest of the group, clinking it with all the other glasses. "I don't think we had a chance to say congratulations for not only winning, but for powering through the interviews and the press," Soline added on, speaking for the rest of the group.
