Sincerely, Yours

48. World's Apart

After leaving their conversation on a somber note, they lay silent in each others arms. Luan felt his words hang in the air between them and though Thoma's arms were wrapped around him, he felt very distant. It wasn't unreasonable to think that this relationship had an expiration date, though neither of them wanted to admit it. Thoma couldn't follow Luan in his dream and Luan wasn't sure enough about himself and his relationship with Thoma to give up on what he wanted for his boyfriend.

"You still awake?" Thoma whispered and Luan hesitated for only a moment before he nodded. He wanted to avoid being sad about their future breakup and instead opted to spend every moment he could being close to Thoma.

Thoma leaned down and kissed Luan's lips softly and whispered, "I love you so much." 

Luan immediately gulped back tears and hugged Thoma closer to him. He let a few tears slip from his eyes and onto Thoma's shoulder but he didn't acknowledge them which Luan was grateful for. He didn't want to talk about anything sad anymore. 

"Could we meet your sisters tomorrow do you think?" Thoma asked suddenly and Luan turned to get his phone to text them. "Yeah, I think that would be fun."

Thoma kissed his head and hugged him once more. "Let's get to sleep. I'll probably only spend a few more days here before getting a flight back." Luan nodded sleepily before drifting off to sleep. 

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"Hana! Jona! We're over here!" Luan called to his sisters'. They'd taken the day off from working at the restaurant to come meet Thoma and Luan. 

They hurried over and both gave Luan a big hug and shook Thoma's hand warmly. "I hope you weren't waiting long. We were trying to get out of the house without dad questioning too much about where we were going." Jona explained and Luan waved her off. "It's no problem. We were just enjoying each others company."

 Thoma set his translator device he'd gotten before coming here and set it on the table, having asked Luan to explain to his sisters' what the device was. They were more than excited that Thoma would be able to understand them and quickly started asking him questions in unison. 

"Hey guys stop! The translator can't pick up when you talk at the same time. It's spitting out nonsense. Please, one at a time." Luan said and both the girls raised their hands as if waiting for him to grant them permission. 

"Just take turns, sheesh," Luan said and motioned to his sister Jona who was sitting across from him. "Go ahead."

Both Hana and Jona alternated questions, some as random as asking Thoma his height to ones about his family. After Thoma answered all of their strange and possibly invasive questions they began to ask him questions about him and Luan. 

"What is it that you liked about Luan?" This question Luan was genuinely curious about and he waited with his chin in his hand for Thoma's answer. 

Thoma looked at Luan's sisters as he answered, "Initially I was intrigued by Luan. He was tough and sarcastic, a little rough around the edges maybe at first but then I began to see him differently. I began to see how kind he was, how smart and how hard he worked. He brought something out in me that had never been there before, a confidence and protectiveness I'd never felt towards anyone." At this he turned to Luan and the latter felt his face grow hot, "I began to learn the battles you were fighting alone and I felt an irresistible pull to save you from it. I began to see how beautiful you were and I knew I was a goner the first time I realized how badly I wanted to kiss you." 

Luan was speechless and his sisters' looked between him. Both his sisters' playfully pushed Thoma's arm and begin to tease him.

"Who said 'I love you' first?" They asked excitedly. This one Luan actually knew was him but it was that time that Thoma was asleep on the couch after they fought. Luan felt too embarrassed so he answered for Thoma. "The first time we told each other we loved each other was actually right before we both came here. We hadn't seen each other properly in a few weeks and.." but Thoma interrupted him. "No, that's not true. You told me you loved me after that fight we had when I fell asleep on the couch. Remember?" 

Luan looked at Thoma wide eyed and his face went red. Thoma knew how he felt about him of course, but knowing that he had in fact heard him confess his love right after throwing a fit, it completely filled Luan with shame. 

"I... well, I..." Luan stumbled over his words and Thoma grabbed his hand. "Why're you embarrassed, honey? I loved you too." At this Thoma turned back to Luan's sisters' and said calmly. "Next question." 

They continued to talk but Luan couldn't make out any words they were exchanging. He was hyper-focused on Thoma's hand in his and his lover's words ringing in his head.

"Why're you embarrassed, honey? I loved you too."

Just then a question asked by his sister broke through his fuzzy brain. "When do you guys think you'll get married?"

It wasn't an unreasonable question, of course. His sisters' never could've known the current situation that Luan and Thoma were in. But all the same, they both fell silent. 

Thoma took over and said simply, "We're just enjoying each others company right now. We both feel it's a bit too soon to be talking about such a big decision." 

Hana and Jona seemed to be satisfied with his answer and the rest of their time together went smoothly. After the cafe they were dragged to a karaoke bar where both Thoma and Luan got to hear each other sing for the first time. Luan was pleasantly surprised that Thoma's voice was so nice. Not like a famous singers, but he could definitely carry a tune. Luan however, felt completely embarrassed to be singing in front of Thoma, so his solo wasn't very good.

After he'd passed the microphone to one of his sisters', he'd plopped down beside Thoma who rubbed his leg reassuringly. "Did you see that guy who just performed? He was so cute." Thoma said and kissed Luan's cheek. 

"I was pretty terrible, huh?" Luan asked, completely embarrassed. "Nah, it was cute. I wish I'd heard you sooner," Thoma answered. Luan noticed he didn't really answer his question about whether or not he was good, but he didn't care. Thoma already loved him, he didn't need to keep proving himself to him. 

"..Okay, we'll head home now," Hana said into her phone. It was so loud in the karaoke room he hadn't even heard her phone ring. 

They both stood up and Thoma and Luan did the same. 

"We have to go. That was dad." Hana explained and first wrapped Luan and then Thoma into a hug. "It was so nice to meet you. I can't wait to be your sister-in-law."

Thoma didn't understand her but he hugged her back. Luan decided not to translate, he knew it'd make him too sad. Jona hugged both of them goodbye before heading back home. 

Thoma and Luan made their walk back to the hotel in silence, walking at a slow pace. The night wind felt fantastic on Luan's face and he closed his eyes to feel it in its entirety. 

His eyes slowly opened and he looked over to see Thoma taking a picture of him. 

"We don't do that enough, huh?"Luan said simply and Thoma tilted his head in question until he understood what Luan meant. 

"Oh, you mean pictures? Yeah, I would agree. We definitely haven't taken enough since we've been here. Come here." Thoma summoned Luan and he hurried to him. 

Thoma wrapped his arm around Luan and the latter held his arm. They smiled for a picture and then Thoma kissed his cheek while Luan closed his eyes. They took a few more and then continued their walk hand in hand. 

"Send those to me won't you?" Luan asked and Thoma grinned. "Of course, honey."

Nothing more was said and they made it back to the hotel a few moment's later. After showering they both lay together and made small talk until Thoma fell asleep on Luan's chest. 

Luan held him a little bit tighter and kissed his head. "I never want days like this to end." 

Luan was sure that he could figure out a way to make it work out with Thoma in the long run. He just wasn't sure how, but maybe with more time it would all come together. It had to, Luan knew he'd never felt like this about anyone and probably never would again. 

"I'll find out a way to keep us together," Luan whispered into Thoma's hair, "I want to love you for as long as I live."