Sincerely, Yours

51. The calm before the Storm

Thoma's alarm went off at 4 am and Luan snuggled into his chest when he heard it. With one arm around Luan, Thoma turned back to snooze his phone.

He wrapped his other arm around Luan and sighed, resting his eyes before he actually had to get up. 

Five minutes pass and Luan was nearly back asleep before he heard the alarm go off again and Thoma start to wriggle his way out of his grasp. He held on to him like a baby koala the entire way he stood up and Thoma laughed once he stood up straight. 

Luan's eyes were still shut as he fought against his lover leaving him but he squinted his eyes open to look at Thoma. "Don't leave me. Stay forever." Luan sleepily grumbled and nuzzled back into Thoma's chest. Thoma squished his face and laughed at his delirious ramblings, "God, you're so cute. But I'm afraid you already turned down my option of staying so I have to leave. And in case you've forgotten my love," Thoma paused with a kiss to Luan's smooshed lips, "You're the one who agreed to take me to the airport remember?" 

Luan grumbled and finally released Thoma, effectively making himself fall to the ground in a heap. "No.. I dont wanna.." he whined and Thoma laughed and picked him up under his armpits to sit him back on the bed. "You're acting awfully childish this morning, baby," Thoma said with a chuckle. 

Luan's face donned a smirk and he wrapped his arms around Thoma's waist and looked up at him feigning innocence. "Wouldn't that make you... my daddy?" 

Thoma looked down at him and gulped, stroking Luan's face with an unreadable expression. "Don't do that to me when I'm in a hurry, baby." Thoma said with a threatening tone. 

Luan laughed and stood up but his back gave out and he sat back down again. "Just give me a few minutes to get up. My lover effectively destroyed my body yesterday."

Thoma tried to hide his smile as he got himself ready to leave. It only took him a few minutes to gather all his stuff and get dressed. Luan quickly got ready himself, throwing on whatever was already on the floor. He'd seen a crewneck of Thoma's that he'd forgotten to pack and he hurriedly slipped it on, effectively claiming it as his own now. 

Once Thoma came out of the bathroom all ready to go he looked at Luan in his crewneck and smiled. "It looks much better on you," he said and reached out his hand, the other on his suitcase handle. 

Luan readily took it and they left the hotel and walked to Luan's parents (his father had permitted him to use the car to drive Thoma to the airport). The drive to the airport was silent. Perhaps it was because Luan felt too tired to talk and Thoma respected that, or neither of them wanted to spend their last moments sad about parting. 

Once at the airport, although they'd arrive an hour early, they felt like they had no time to say goodbye. It felt like minutes before Thoma's flight was being called over the speaker. 

Luan felt panicked and Thoma could see the sadness in his eyes. "Hey, hey it's okay. Come here," He soothed and pulled him into his arms, cradling his head. 

"I love you so much, baby." Thoma said and Luan let the tears he'd been holding in fall onto Thoma's shirt. He gripped Thoma's shirt in his hands and wanted to tell him not to go. He felt pathetic but it felt miserable knowing he wouldn't wake up next to Thoma tomorrow. 

"I love you too, Thoma. So much," Luan practically whispered and Thoma sighed as he cupped Luan's face in his hand. He wiped the tears from his eyes and even though there were quite a few people in the airport right now, Thoma kissed his wet cheeks. "Book your flight tonight and come back to me soon, okay?" Thoma said and Luan nodded. He wanted to at least be back in time for the play. He knew he could no longer take part in it, but he at least needed to see it through and appreciate everything his boyfriend put into it. 

"I'll be back in time for the play." Luan said with certainty and Thoma laughed. "Well we're aiming to have it next weekend, so you better be back in my arms by then." 

Luan couldn't put his finger on it, but his anxiety shot through him when Thoma said that. He felt like there was an impending disaster that might keep him from Thoma in this next two weeks. But he didn't dare tell Thoma his anxiety filled worries. It was ridiculous to think so dramatically when things had been completely fine.

All too soon the final calls were being announced and Thoma really had to go. He had yet to go through security and at this rate, he might not make his flight. 

Wouldn't that just be terrible... Luan thought sarcastically but immediately shook off the thought. He'd been so selfish about Thoma leaving. His indecisiveness was surely giving Thoma whiplash and Luan really had meant it when he wanted Thoma to do what was best for him. Maybe he'd just selfishly hoped that what was best for Thoma was being beside him. But he'd never admit that. 

The drive back to his parents was sad and boring. When Luan parked the car back in the garage and was about to walk back to the hotel, he saw his father sitting on their porch, drinking his morning tea with his mother. Luan's first initial reaction was to walk past them without waving but Thoma had just settled things between them yesterday. So Luan waved morning to them and his mother waved him over. 

"You drop Timothy off at the airport already?" His mother asked and handed him a cup of tea. Luan took it with a thankful nod and sighed. "Yeah." 

"He was quite a handsome man, Lu. I like him." His mother continued and Luan felt like the tears would start to fall if he was forced to continue talking about Thoma. 

Luan's father interjected, "What do you plan to do with the rest of your time here, Lu?" Luan felt grateful that his father had steered the conversation away from Thoma, even if he'd done it for his own reasons. 

"Not sure. I probably should focus on the school I have due. I can also pick up some shifts at the restaurant too to earn money. But I should look into getting back to America in this coming week. I only came for dad and he's doing fine so..." Luan said and sipped his tea. 

"Why don't you stay here until you leave?" Luan's mother asked and Luan looked immediately to his father. It still felt unreal to him that after one conversation with Thoma he was okay with Luan being gay. Or maybe not as much okay but more just too tired to keep fighting a losing battle. 

All Luan's father did was shrug and Luan knew that was his version of a yes. He was grateful because although Thoma had caused a rift in their relationship, he'd also been the only person to be able to repair his father and his relationship for a semblance of normalcy.

Luan spent the rest of the afternoon clearing out the hotel room and getting ready to take everything to his parents. He felt sad as he picked up everything, knowing that it would only be his stuff he was putting away. Even Thoma's side of the bed had started to not smell like him. But Luan was able to find solace in the fact that he would see Thoma in this coming week. He also decided to shoot Thoma a quick text so they could find a time to call tomorrow if he wasn't too busy. 

With one last glance into the now soulless hotel room, Luan shut the door and went downstairs to wait for his dad to pick him up.