Sincerely, Yours

37. What does this mean for us?

 (Mature Content)

A few moments ago Luan had been living a blissful moment with his boyfriend. Now the next, he was staring into space, stressing about how he was going to afford a plane ticket home, how long he'd be staying, what this would mean for his school work... 

Thankfully Thoma saw him spiraling and wrapped him into a hug. "How can I help?" Was all he asked and just like that Luan felt at peace. He sighed and buried his face into Thoma's chest. 

"I don't know where to start. I want to just go back to a moment ago where all I had in my mind was you.." Luan grumbled and Thoma rubbed his back.

"When do you have to leave?" Thoma asked after a minute of silence. 

Luan groaned and pulled away. "She didn't say. Just that I needed to head back home to.. I don't know.. be with my dad. He's in the hospital right now." Luan explained and Thoma apologized but Luan shrugged.

"I mean, he's probably fine. He's tough. But I think I'd be going to help out my mom with the restaurant. Ugh.. I don't have time for this!" Luan exclaimed but his eyes widened as he realized what he said. "Shit, I didn't mean that...it's just I. I haven't been back home since I was 20 and I didn't leave things on the best note. I just feel so overwhelmed." 

Thoma smiled at him. "Hey, it's okay. You're allowed to have selfish thoughts and share them with me. But we both know that your family needs you right now. You need to go. And I'll help however I can."

Luan felt terrible that things had only just started to go right and now he was leaving Thoma for an unspecified amount of time. He hoped it would only be a month or so but who knew. Part of him wanted to bring Thoma along but he quickly disregarded the thought. His parents had not and would never accept the fact that he was gay. So to bring his lover with him during a family emergency, to a place he didn't even speak the language, it was impossible. 

"Hey, what're you thinking. I can tell Charlie about your departure and we can postpone the play till you get back.." Thoma began to say but Luan shook his head. 

"Last time we did that because of the vandalism, it was a disaster. My understudy knows everything so I'm not worried about that." Luan said but internally he felt pretty bummed out. He'd been working extra hard on this play, to impress a certain someone, and now he had to give it up. But it was just one of the many things he was going to have to sacrifice. 

Thoma looked disappointed but he didn't comment. "Okay then your work. Are you able to take a leave of absence if you let your boss know the situation? Also your school? If you're able to do online or they can hold off until you get back to hand in your assignments?"

Luan knew Thoma was trying to help but putting into light just how much he still had to take care of only managed to stress him out more. 

Just so they wouldn't talk about it anymore, Luan kissed Thoma. 

Thoma seemed surprised but he also had to admit that the thought of Luan leaving for a long time was stressing him out. A month of barely seeing Luan had depressed him and now he was leaving out of country? It was a lot to take in. 

Thoma started to walk them back the bedroom and he laid Luan on the bed. Neither one of them was especially horny anymore but they needed this right now. They needed to be close and intimate, vulnerable and naked in each others arms. 

Thoma took off his shirt and Luan sat up to take his off as well. 

Thoma was startled to see tears slowly streaming down Luan's cheeks once his shirt was over his head. Immediately he knelt by the bed and placed his hands on Luan's knees.