Diary of a Trans Girl: The Revival Of The Diary

Sunday 21st of May 2023

Things are certainly different. I dated my current girlfriend just out of high school and now we're back together after 11 years. We're the same people just far more life experienced than we were back then. She's still the most intelligent person I know that will likely never change. Now that our exes are out of the picture, mostly. We're opening up to each other more intimately which feels familiar but entirely different at the same time. Which now that I write it makes zero sense whatsoever haha. She's had children and been through years of neglect from her ex. I've been forced to have sex because my last partner had a high sex drive. So neither of us was sure how long it would take us to get to that stage or if we even would. We found ourselves feeling things for one another that we hadn't felt for a long time and a magnetism that has been created by having such strong romantic feelings for one another. Now we're on a level of intimacy I never expected I'd feel comfortable at again. Things have changed for me lately though. I'm becoming more okay with the idea of not needing bottom surgery. After all the risk with my health issues and the cost is far too much. I have responsibilities to the people I care about to stay fit and healthy.
Going back to what I was saying earlier, I feel so comfortable with her. The thing that makes me feel so safe with her, is that she cares so deeply for me as much as I do for her. She shows it as well, for once it's not just words but actions. I've been in so many one-sided relationships that it feels both strange and exciting to be in one that feels like true equality. Two queens providing their family and home with happiness and love.
I'm incredibly happy to have my second chance with her and I'm never going to let her down or let her go like I did in the past. I'm going to hold onto her, always listen to her and to love her like she's never been loved before.
When we last dated she dated who I was. Now she's dating me as who I am and I can truly feel the difference. I'm happy being with her and I feel like we'll go far together.
-Jane