Kitty: *tumbles back through the portal and into the concrete spork chamber, her tail still smoldering from her antics - glances around, dumbfounded* Sorry, I had to go take care of a pissed off spring monster.
Frank: *visibly shaken - crosses himself* Hallowed be thy Capcom, I have never encountered such... Assholeishness.
Kitty: Oh, blow me.
Frank: Not talking about you.
Kitty: Well then; still blow me.
Nick: Kitty...
Kitty: Please?
Nick: Kitty!
Kitty: Nick.
Nick: Your tail!
Kitty: *non-plussed - glances at it, ears pricked* Oh. Yeah. It does that sometimes *conjures a lovely craft beer, cracks the seal, downs most of it, then stuffs her tail into the neck of the bottle, steam hissing and coming off her extinguished tail. Licks her lips* Piss weak beer anyway.
Frank: Lovely.
Kitty: Also doubles as a hefty club. Unfortunately, only a one hitter quitter but meh.
Nick: Right. D'you think you can handle four more pages before we finish this chapter?
Kitty: Now with my lovely companion, Gwen I think I can take on the world.
Frank: Who the he-- Oh, my god you named it!
Kitty: *purrs and nuzzles her new tail friend*
Nick: *head in his hands, regretting every life decision that lead him to this moment*
Frank: *cuts him a sympathetic look* Right?
Nick: Let's just get this over with before she starts going crazy.
Frank: Bit late for that, ain't it?
*a fluttering of wind and a rustle of feathers followed by a blinding light*
Andrew: *wings fold to a rest at his side as the others uncover their eyes* 'Sup.
Kitty: *squeals, shielding her delicate bestie, Gwen* Careful! Don't you have dimmer settings?
Andrew: I can't help it. Part of being puppeteer'd by a divine being.
Kitty: Which you don't believe in. Cuz atheist.
Andrew: Well...
Kitty: Much like your buddy here. Unbeknownst to her, at least.
Andrew: That's easy for you to say, piloting her body and robbing her of her freedom whilst preaching it yourself.
Kitty: Hey, your bitch of a crush is still very much present y'know. And she signed up for this, Sherlock. So maybe cut the 'tude and help a sister out already. Before I shank you.
Andrew: *rolls his eyes*
Nick: Right?
Andrew: Just to be clear, I'm only doing this for her. And because Frank looks to be traumatized after your most recent escapade.
Frank: Anything to get out of this shit, I'll take it.
Nick: And why don't I get a free pass?
Kitty: I'm pretty sure all you need is a hard reboot. I.e summon Viv to hit you with a wrench. Or I just cut out the middle man and summon a wrench.
Nick: I'm good, thanks.
Kitty: *spawns a portal to the Nut n' Bolt in Boston* Am sure the host and Hancock will be waiting. Maybe with a cold one if you ask nicely.
YOU ARE READING
Topside: Realm of the Onion
Humor"'Consumed by sadness and the fallout of a now retreating fear.' That ought to be tagline for what it's like sporking this shit." ~KittyHP [A/N true to my word.] Sporking: Stones to Abbigale. A book so bad it misspells it's title character's name. A...
