Kpop Sickfics / Hurtfics

🐺 Lee Know - - Is This How It Ends? - Part 2

~ Minho's POV ~

Everybody knows the five stages of grief:

Denial

- Are you sure? Can you do more tests? There has to be another explanation! I can't have cancer, my career would be over, do you understand that?

Anger

- Why did it have to be me? Why is the universe, or god, or whatever the fuck is up there, why is it punishing me? I don't deserve this!

Bargaining

- You know, I've read that if I drink 5 liters of water every day, it will flush the cancer out of my system! And I could also try acupuncture, or crystal healing, I could visit spiritual leaders! That would work, right? Right?

Depression

- So, I'm really going to die, huh? I'm fine with that, actually, I don't mind dying. Why me? I don't want to die actually, I want to live for so long... Please, let me live...

Acceptance

- I need to fight this, I need to live. I will live. It will be fucking hard, but I will not give up now.

I went through them, and my surroundings, especially my friends heard all of these sentences. I haven't even started treatment, but it already has been physically and mentally exhausting.

I didn't leave the hospital since I was brought in a few days ago, after I passed out in dance practice. I was immediately put on hiatus, actually, the whole group was, so they could be with me.

I appreciate them so much, they literally kept the soul in me.

~ 2-week time skip ~

~ Chan's POV ~

After he received his first round of chemotherapy, Minho was finally able to come home for a bit. He was still very fragile, very sick, so we were extra careful around him.

He is still rapidly losing weight, he simply can't keep any food, and lately any liquids, down. It's a fight he seems to be losing. There were countless nights even before his diagnosis, when I woke up to the sound of throwing up and retching from the bathroom, and I spent those nights caressing his back, and carrying his unconscious body back to my bed.

He is slowly disappearing from our hands.

I had hope, that he would slowly start getting better, but of course, I knew that it wouldn't be that easy. Still, I was praying, that this little time that he gets to spend home with us, would go by without any incidents.

I hoped for too much.

The second day, his first morning at home, I felt like something was wrong. I was waiting for Minho at the kitchen, when I heard his small voice from his room. I Immediately ran to him.

- Are you okay, what's happening? – He was laying in his bed, only half of his body being covered by his blanket. He was shivering, his lips were a bluish color.

- I'm... I'm so cold... but I can't move... Hyung, I feel so weak... – His words sent chills down my spine, as I quickly approached and examined him. He was quietly crying, while I covered him up with two extra blankets. I sat down next to him, and waited, as he calmed down.

- I will always be here for you, okay? No matter what will happen, I promise to always be by your side. – I held his left hand, and watched as he slowly fell asleep. I waited for his breathing to become regular, then I let my emotions go.

I was scared. I tried not to show it, but I was absolutely terrified for his future.

I feared for his life.

~

We decided to bring him back to the hospital that afternoon. He tried to prove to us that he was fine, but he couldn't even stand up by himself. I carried him to our van again, and we drove him back.

He protested at first, even tried to physically escape, but he was simply too exhausted and sickly. He ended up falling asleep in the car, and only woke up, when I lifted him into his hospital bed. He wasn't able to keep his eyes open or speak at that point, and we were ushered out of the room, as soon as the doctors arrived.

My dearest Minho, please stay strong.

We need you.

~ Minho's POV ~

I don't know if it's day or night.

I don't know who the people sitting around my bed are.

I don't know where I am.

The only thing I know, is that I'm in pain. So much pain. And the worst thing is, I can't express it.

I'm too weak and tired. I'm either sleeping, or I was laying awake, only being able to open my eyes for a few seconds.

This isn't living anymore.

I was dying.

...

I can't die. Not now, not here.

~ 2 months time skip ~

I can't believe that I am still here. I few months ago, I was actively dying, and now, by some sort of miracle, I am alive.

I'm not well, by any means, I'm still undergoing chemo, and I'm still very ill, but yesterday, I took my first steps after 2 months! It's a huge step (pun intended) towards my recovery, and the doctors now have hope that I could make it.

And although this time is happier, I will never forget the nights, when I woke up to Chan or Jisung sobbing next to my bed, pleading with me to stay.

Hey, guys, I kept my promise. I think I'll stay.

I have a long road ahead of me, but I'm never alone. And that gives me strength.

~ Chan's POV ~

He's alive, and that's enough for me. He fought so hard, our Minho, he gave his all, and somehow he came back from death's grip.

He took his first steps a few days ago, and ever since, you can't wipe the smile off his face. He has been talking and walking and eating again, I can see the natural blush returning to his face.

I can see the old Minho in him again.

I know that this isn't the end of the story, and there might be scarier times, there might be happier times, but for now, he seems to be doing better.

And that can be enough.

~~~~

I wanted a happy ending for this one, I hope you like it!