Let it kill you (Dabi x reader

Chapter 53

♧ ♧ ♧
A few days passed and your hands were healed along with your feet. You caught a glimpse of your self in the mirror in the bathroom but didn't look long enough to see what you looked like. You were getting ready for the meeting tonight and put on clothes that would cover the bruises you could see without a mirror. You walked out and saw Jasmine sitting on the couch.

"So can you tell I got my ass beat?" You asked in a joking tone as that was your way of trying to cope.

"Uhhh only a little bit" Jasmine said going along with it. "Y/n have you looked at your face?" She said in a serious tone.

"No" you said softly.

"Come on" she said gently grabbing your arm and bringing you to the bathroom.

She walked in front of the mirror with you and you wouldn't look up.

"Come on Y/n, look at yourself" she said in a soft tone.

You didn't say anything you just looked at the ground. You didn't want to look at your self not only because of the bruises but also because deep down, even though he hit you, you still haven't come to terms that he could have died and you still blamed yourself.

"Y/n... please" Jasmine said softly once more. "This is the only way you can move past what you are feeling"

You sighed in defeat. She was right. You hated when she was right. You took a deep breath before. You brought your eyes up to the mirror, seeing yourself for the first time. You examined your face and you weren't surprised. You knew he beat you up pretty bad you were surprised it wasn't worse. You didn't know you had a black eye though. You looked down at your neck the bruises being a dark purple with spots of yellow and green. You brought your hand gently up to touch your neck lightly pressing down feeling the pain shoot through your neck.

"I can cover them up with makeup if you want" Jasmine said and you looked at her though the mirror and nodded.

She went and got her makeup and went to work. She started with your face. She was extra carful around your eye so it wouldn't get irritated as the swelling just went down completely. She covered up the scar on your cheek and moved down to your neck. She tilted your chin up so she could see better. When she finished she pulled your hair in front of your shoulders and nodded.

"Finished" she said and yo turned around.

Your eyes widened slightly. It looked like nothing happened. You looked normal.

"Do you like it?" She asked and you looked back at her.

"Yeah I do" you said giving her a smile.

You both grabbed your stuff and started walking to the hideout. You both walked in silence while you smoked. As you both got closer you felt your nerves skyrocket. Jasmine noticed and just walked closer to you trying to comfort you. You felt an uneasy feeling in your stomach until you were distracted by a presence that could only belong to one person.

"Hey guys wait up" Hawks said as he flew over to you and Jasmine.

"Hawks what are you doing here?" Jasmine asked as she saw you shrink slightly.

"I was called to the meeting so I'm here" he said in his charming tone as always.

He and Jasmine talked while they both walked next to you and you stayed silent. As you saw the hideout come into view you saw both Jasmine and Hawks glance at you ignored it and kept walking.

"Hey Jasmine go a head of us, I need to talk to Y/n" Hawks said stopping and you looked back at him.

You looked at him and already knew what he was going to talk to you about. You looked at jasmine who was looking at you to see if you were okay with it. You nodded and she hummed.

"You needed to talk to me" you said as he walked over to you.

"Yeah I haven't seen you since that night and just want to make sure you are okay" he said and you sighed.

"Well I'm fine, no need to check in" you said and he shook his head.

"You are one of the strongest people I have every met Y/n" he said and you gave him a half smile. "But kinda like how you could see through my lies, I can see through yours."

"Okay you caught me" you said. "I'm not fine, far from it actually" you said crossing your arms and he sighed.

"I can only imagine, how are your injuries?" He asked seeing you subconsciously bring your hand up to your neck.

"Well as of now I have a black eye, a scar on my cheek, and bruises around my neck. Along with bruises on my arms, legs, and my back." You said looking at your hands. "I also had glass in my hands and feet and my hair was just falling out for a day or two."

"Jesus" he said looking at you. "I'm sorry"

"Don't apologize, its not your fault" you said looking at him. "But I do have a question." You said and he nodded. "Why were you coming to the house?" You asked and he sighed.

"I was coming to give you some free time, Compress was going to make sure Dabi didn't hurt himself to bad during training." He said and you nodded. "We ran into each other and when we were a few feet from the stairs we heard the commotion"

"Well thank you" you said. "For breaking it up" you said feeling tears start to form in your eyes.

"Always" Hawks said seeing your tears and opened his arms for you to hug him. "Don't cry to hard you'll mess up your makeup" he said making you laugh.

You pulled away from the hug and started walking to the hideout. When you got to the door you stopped with your hand on the door knob.

"Your nervous?" Hawks asked and you nodded. "I get it, but don't worry me, Jasmine and Compress are here. We aren't gonna let anything happen to you." He said reassuring you.

"I know, I just need a minute" you said letting go of the door knob. "You go in though, I'll be fine"

"Okay, I'll be waiting" he said and went inside.

You stood outside just looking at the door. You felt your head start spinning with flashbacks from that night as you started to breath harder. You closed your eyes trying to calm your thoughts by focusing on your surroundings. You were listing off things you could hear to distract yourself. You felt your breathing slowdown as you calmed yourself. You had to work past this and the only way to do that was to not be afraid. You had to stop being scared of him. You knew it wasn't going to happen in a day but this was the first step you had to take. You took a deep breath and opened your eyes looking at the door. You twisted the door knob opening it leaving as much of your fear outside as you could. You refused to be scared of him.
♧ ♧ ♧