How To Love

chapter twenty-five

I woke up in Thuso's arms. Honestly, I didn't think I'd ever get used to this. Every time it happened, my heart fluttered.

The only thing different about this morning, was that pleasantly achy feeling in my nether regions and thighs. We definitely took it a bit far. If I thought it through, it felt like I was playing catch up with all the years I've missed out on it, as for Thuso, his stamina definitely matched mine, or maybe even exceeded mine by like 10%. Whatever the cause though, I loved it.

Stirring in his arms, I made to get out of bed. The burning feeling between my thighs needed to be sorted out, and the best way to do that was to relieve myself. Quietly, at least as quiet as I could get, I got out of bed and headed to the en-suite. Let's just say, worst peeing action in my life, because why did it burn so much? My cookie felt raw. How could it not? You had like five rounds last night! My subconscious reminded me and I blushed to myself. That we did.

Thinking a bath with Epsom salt will relieve the pain, I poured some bath water and got inside once it was filled. I soaked in the warm water for five minutes before actually washing up, and I could admit that I felt much better after the bath. Once my teeth were brushed and my face was washed and moisturised, I returned to the room, still as naked as day, but feeling much fresher than before.

I found Thuso awake, and he licked his bottom lip, eyes scanning my bare form. My clit danced, but my mind protested. I felt spent.

"I won't go into bed when you have that look on your face," I whined.

"What look is that?" He asked, smirking up at me.

"Like you plan to finish me off, I'm spent baby, I can't go anymore," I said and he laughed at my expense.

"Don't worry baby, we won't do anything you don't want. But I miss you in my arms, come back to bed," he said, lifting the comforter so that I could have easy access back into bed. I obliged him, closing my eyes in content as he softly kissed me good morning. I was surprised when he tasted like mint and smelled freshly showered.

"Did you go use the other bathroom to wash up?" I asked.

"Yeah, I didn't want you coming back to my morning breath when you had just brushed your teeth," he said with a cheese. I smiled, shaking my head lightly. What a thoughtful gent.

"We need to talk," I said after a moment of silence.

"That we do. After last night, there's a high chance of you getting pregnant. Are you ready? Or do you want me to go get plan B?" He asked. My heart was beating fast.

"Yes, there is. Honestly speaking? I think I am. I've always wanted to have kids before the age of 30. And, I've already decided I want this, us forever. Maybe it might be too soon, but I'm ready. I guess I am more worried about you? After what happened with Njabulo?" I waited for his response with bated breath.

"I think I've worked through my issues regarding that situation. I think the session I had with her at therapy also helped me move on from the situation completely. Yes, it hurts that I lost that chance, but in hindsight, I'm not holding on to that pain anymore. As for being ready to fathering your kids, our kids? I've never been ready for anything in my life like I am for this. I was ready seven months ago, when they told me we were going to get married, hoping for such a day to come. Though never in my wildest dreams, did I think we would be here today," he said. My heart pulled. The Njabulo subject still made my heart ache, for more than one reason.

I kind of felt guilty. Don't get me wrong, the prospect of being pregnant excited me, especially being pregnant alongside someone I loved and who loved me, someone who was going to be by my side through it all, without fail. But it made me feel guilty because in a way, my union with Thuso, took that away from Njabulo. Yes, Thuso was going to be a present father, but she was going to have go through seeing the guy she loved, love someone else, someone she thought would be her forever, play happy families with someone else.

I'm not saying that I'd abort my baby for something like that, I don't think I'd abort my baby for any reason, unless medically advised, but I'm saying I understood. The prospect of having two homes, where your child had to bounce from one home to another, wasn't an ideal one. And clearly, for Njabulo, it wasn't what she wanted. And I couldn't fault her for it.

"So are we both agreeing that should I get pregnant, we'd both be happy with the results?" I asked, worrying my lip into my mouth. Honestly, as much as I was ready, I was also very nervous. New chapters always wracked me.

"Yes," he said and then he kissed my forehead, my nose, and finally my lips, to seal the confirmation, and the silent promise to go through that stage together when it came.

•••

We were finally going home. The whole thing was bittersweet, but it had to be done. Saying goodbye to my in-laws was a crying affair. I'd actually enjoyed myself during my stay here. It made me feel one with the family, and leaving that behind was sad.

As for saying goodbye to my family, that part was the hardest. I cried so much as I hugged my father, promising to call him everyday, and making him promise that he would stay healthy. I even promised that I would visit home biweekly, so that I got to see them as often as I could.

My mom pulled me off to the side, leaving my dad and Thuso to talk. I raised an eyebrow, and Thuso gave me a 'don't leave me alone with this man' look. I laughed at his expense, but knew he was in good hands. I've not told him that my dad was coming around yet.

"So you're going huh?" My mother asked. She wore a sad face, and it made my heart ache. I guess my family got used to me being around a lot that me leaving made everyone sad.

"Yep, but this time I won't be gone for long. I'll be visiting so much, you'll probably get tired of me," I said with a chuckle.

"That could never happen my baby. My kids are my pride and joy, though your brothers give me a headache more than joy," she said with a grimace and I laughed.

"You know you love them," I said.

"That I do. And I love you too. Anyway, you seem happier today, you're even glowing, anything I should know?" I groaned. Why did she have to be observant. Was it even appropriate to tell your mother about your sex life?

"If you have to know, Thuso and I consummated our marriage last night," I said, and then squealed while covering my eyes because I felt kind of weird telling my mom I had sex.

"Does that mean I should be expecting grand babies? I'm approaching 50, and I'd like to be strong for my grandkids when they come," she said.

"I cannot speak on God's plan, but if it's in his will, then yes, you should be expecting a grand child, or, knowing our blood line, then grandchildren soon." My father was a twin and had twins. Thuso's father had twin brothers, and birthed twins for his second children, much like my dad. So it was highly likely that I'd have twins too.

"God, please answer my prayers and make me a grandma soon!" My mother prayed with clasped hands and I laughed, but said amen regardless.

Thuso came into the kitchen right after that, wearing a victory smile like he'd just won a medal. I raised a brow, but he just kissed my forehead once he was by my side and turned to my mother.

"Mama, we will be leaving now," he announced. My mother nodded, pulling Thuso into a hug. They escorted us to the car, and I hugged my brothers tightly before getting inside. Once safely locked away, I silently cried, mostly because leaving them after such a heavy incident that brought us together, made me sad. Thuso's hand on my thigh gave me the comfort I needed.