Pretend

Chapter 30

Liv's POV:

What the fuck just happened?

Did I just start rivalry to win Maddy's heart?

I don't know if I should laugh or actually feel threatened that what me and Maddy have can be tested because of Torrey.

It all felt too ridiculous to be real.

I sort of sensed something was happening between them but Maddy told me that they were just friends.

Why would she lie? Does she think that I would be jealous?

The mere thought made me scoff. I wasn't the type to get possessive or envious.

But the uncertainty made me overthink all morning. I refused to let this ridiculous rivalry to cover Torrey's broken ego tarnish the genuine connection Maddy and I built.

Before I knew it, the lecture was over for class and I headed outside sitting on the bench as I smoked a cigarette.

My eyes remained stuck on the screen of my phone. I waited hoping for a text or anything from Maddy.

Yet I got nothing.

"Girl, where have you been?" Olivia's voice cuts through the haze of thoughts as she sat down next to me on the bench. While Mackenzie stood nearby and leaned against the wall.

"Are you okay? Fucking Torrey shouldn't have done that" Mackenzie asked with a sense of concern. Her tone suggests Torrey's outbursts were no surprise to her.

"She's a freaking sadist" Olivia scoffed gesturing to my cigarette and we shared the cigarette.

I couldn't help but laugh. Torrey is all talk, nothing else. Anyways I'm not trying to spend my time, talking about her. I need to talk to Maddy.

I was debating on rather or not I should tell them about Maddy but me and her never talked about labels or what even are we.

Until I know for sure, she is a secret.

As time went by, they took the memo and talked about something else as we shared the cigarette.

I feel a buzz from my pocket and I see that she had texted me.

Maddy: Meet me at my dorm

I hope this is not some booty call. I wouldn't mind but I don't do hookups with just anyone. We need to make things clear on what we are.

I need to know.

"I... forgot something um I'll text you guys later?"

They nod symbolically as I headed to the dormitory. I head to her floor and knock on her door waiting.

The door creaks open and I see her. Her eyes softened as she saw me. "Hey" she murmured, her voice a delicate whisper. I smile and without a word she gestures me inside.

I head in, the door closing behind me. I look around and see that her bed was made and it seemed like she didn't sleep here.

Everywhere was so clean, way cleaner then the first time I came into this room.

I felt my stomach tie into knots and I didn't know what this feeling was. "You.. stayed somewhere last night after the party?" I turn to her as she looked at me confused.

Why wouldn't she be confused... we aren't exclusive. She fixes her cargo pants and walks over to me. "Yeah, I stayed up all night working on a project I had for my photography class" she says clenching her jaw.

I should trust her.. but something is telling me that she is lying. Maybe it's my overthinking self... but it wouldn't be the first time she lied to me, so why not stop.

She walks over to her bag and grabs a folder. She looks at it anxious as she walked over to me.

"I have some samples... I don't know" she murmured scratching her chin and I look at the multiple pictures of amazing pictures and how beautifully she captured her subjects. I couldn't stop looking at them.

As my fingers brushed over the surface of the photographs, my breath catching in my throat as I stumbled upon the final picture.

It was a snapshot of us, our shades of intimacy covered as it was early in the morning. Our first date. And our first time.

My heart quickened.

"...Do you like it?" Her voice quivered as she try meeting my gaze but I felt my eyes stuck on the picture.

Her hand touches my arm making me break from my gaze and I meet hers. "It's... beautiful" my voice barley sounded like a whisper. She searches my eyes and softly smiles.

"I should have asked.. but durning the moment.. I didn't want to it to slip away" she whispered as her gaze was locked on mine, searching for a bit of understanding.

No one has ever done this. I couldn't stop the tingles in my heart as it felt like anxiousness and desire. Tension built around us as we didn't say anything but gaze at each other.

I found myself leaning closer to her, my breath mingling with hers. Her lips parted as she slowly closed her eyes. She places the folder on the table and kissed me.

The kiss deepened as I moved my hands to her waist, pulling her closer. My heart raced as our lips moved in sync.

As much as I wanted to kiss her even more, I couldn't stop thinking of Torrey. I need to know.

I force myself to lean back catching her trying to lean in. Her eyes slowly opened flickering with confusion as she met my gaze.

"We need to talk"

Her expression softened and she nodded in agreement as her hands gently trace to mine's.

We sit down on her bed as she fully moves her body towards me giving me her full attention. "I..know that you and Torrey used to date. Why did you lie to me?"

Her hand loosened from her hold and she put her hands back on her sides. She looks down and says "It's complicated. Our history, is intense. We were different and just...didn't work out"

She clenched her jaw and looked back at me with softer eyes. What did she even see in Torrey?

"I wanted you to know that.. what we have is great. But... I'm not looking for anything. I can't be with anyone exclusive" she says probably expecting me to be sad.

But I'm not.

I'm glad. I came here expecting no strings and I will leave here with no strings.

I'm not a relationship person, I can't be in one. And I should probably take her response as exit ticket. Just focus on myself until I graduate.

Yet, I can't help not wanting to be around her. The way she makes me feel is a feeling I never thought I would get. A feeling that's too confusing to explain.

Before I said anything, she responds "I think it's best if I just show you"