Pretend

Chapter 47

Liv's POV:

I didn't want to get out of the bed. Fearing that I would see her. I can't function when I'm around her and last night proved that.

She is right... what we did was a mistake. Yet why did it feel so good? And I know she felt it too because the way she looked at me said so much that I do not know where to begin.

Plus my legs were killing me. She fucked me like it was her last day on earth.

I somehow I get what Maddy saw in her. Maybe she's not so bad...fuck- Maddy.

No. No. She said we are not even together. I shouldn't feel bad even though I fucked her ex and my soon to be step- sister.

I couldn't lay here anymore before I get drowned with my thoughts. I get up and walk to the washroom. I shower and as I'm getting ready with a towel around my body still. I see a red hickey that's a bit blurry from the view on the mirror.

I wipe the mirror and see a huge hickey mark on my neck. AGAIN. What the fuck. I try rubbing it with my knuckle, using a technique I saw on YouTube.

It was wearing off. I decide to just apply concealer and get on with my day.

I'm never having sex with her again.

I head out to the hallway and I see her door still closed. Memories start flowing back to me from last night and I felt my legs go numb again.

Snap out of it, Liv.

I continue to walk down and head down to the first floor. I'm welcomed with the smell of pancakes.

I walk to the smell and see Chris standing infront of the oven as he is cooking.

How is he even able to stand? Cause from yesterday, it was like he couldn't even breathe.

I walk over and he turns around and looks at me. His face lights up as he placed down everything he was holding and walks over to me.

"Come seat" he gestured over to the dining table as I felt obliged to. I still felt weird about him after knowing what he had been doing to Torrey and maybe to Shawn to.

I promised myself, I would not go around that type of negative energy again. Yet I find myself back in the loop.

And there's nothing i can do. I keep imagining my mom's face on how she would react if I told her that her soon to be husband was just like father.

It would destroy her.

I don't want to be the cause of that. Not unless Torrey wants me to.

Doesn't mean.. I'm going to put on this picture and pretend his a good guy.

He places the two fluffy pancakes on a plate and walks over to me. He placed the plate on the table and steps back.

"I..don't want what happened yesterday.. to change your view on this family" he said sitting down on the side chair.

He pressed his powered hands together and stared at me like he was waiting for a respond.

Was this his way of making me quiet? "Which part, the one from the party or the one with you pressing Torrey against the wall?" I look at him as his eyes stunned.

"You and I both know that Torrey is not an easy person. With Matthew gone.. I expected her to be the one to step up when I'm away. To take care of Shawn and make sure he doesn't get hurt"

"That's sounds like a job for a parent. Sounds like your projecting and forcing your own responsibilities to her" my words make his nose flare as he softly smiles. I get up not feeling hungry anymore as he just stares at me.

I wanted to confront him on the abuse he had been doing to Torrey but I know she wouldn't want me to do that.

"I'm not done" his voice was firm as he stood tall and grabbed my arm. I look at his swollen eyes and I saw a glimpse of my father. My heart felt like it was a ticking bomb.

I felt frozen.

Snap out of it, Liv.

"What? Your going to hit me? I promise that's not something you want to do"

He loosened his grip and I shrug him off.

"I wasn't-"

"Touch me again, and I will make you regret it" I walk off and press the button on the elevator.

I know where Torrey gets her anger from.

"Torrey's gone. She left last night. Guess she didn't want to face the consequences of her own actions" he said loud enough for me to hear.

I watch him walk to me with his hands placed in his pockets. He steps closer enough for me to see his smile.

"I don't want you to end up like her. Broken. Useless. Unloveable and stupid. Your like a daughter I always wanted. I can help you accomplish so much" his words were like morphine, the more it injects into you, the more you want it even though you know it's bad.

I wanted to hear more. His eyes softened at my silence and he stepped closer. "Don't let her ruin your view of this family. Your studying to become a lawyer right?"

How does he know that? My mom must have told him. I don't respond but I nod.

"I can make sure you reach there smoothly, and then you can work under me and I promise... it would be worth it" he says and it was like God was talking to me. He seemed like a saviour to me.

Yet I knew I was staring at the devil. Torrey probably just went to her parties like usual or to Issac.

She didn't leave.

She wouldn't...

"Only thing you have to do is... not say anything about the situation between me and Torrey to your mother " he says finally as the elevator opens. I mean Torrey asked for the same thing.

It's a win- win situation. Unless she actually left. I head into the elevator and he just looks at me.

"I'll think about it" is all I could say as I entered the elevator.

The elevator closes and I felt my chest tighten as I gripped against the rims and leaned against the wall.

I finally reached my floor and I walked as fast as I can to her room. I'm kept on pausing hoping the last 4 days were just a dream.

I touch the handle and opened it. I head in and I see her bed neatly made, her guitar case but the guitar is gone, her family picture frames are all there besides a baby picture of Shawn.

I rush over to her cabinets and see all of her clothes are gone.

My fingers started to tremble as I leaned away.

She really left.

She actually left me.