Pretend

Chapter 48

Torrey's POV:

I play with the strings of my guitar as I take puffs of my cigarette. I look at the small pitched window near me as I get up and opened it.

I lay back on my twin size bed and continue to play with the strings. I haven't figured out a rhythm since it's been months since I last played.

I stare at the empty space of my room. I was always neat but sometimes I hated it.

There was no touch of me in here besides my guitar. I put the guitar down and put it on the side. I go on my phone and message Isaac.

: Thanks again for helping me with the move in

🍃: You can thank me by making me a song. Hmm how about issac is my baby

: shut up🤣

I place my phone done and I start to think about Liv and Shawn. I left them with that man. I mean I know that lib can take care of herself but after everything she knows.

Her staying with him... without protection is scary to think about.

What if he does it to her?

Knowing him, he'll probably spend his time making lies on my name to keep his cover.

And Shawn.. poor Shawn. I need to know that he will be okay without me. Even though I promised myself that I would never leave him.

But everything just became to much that staying in that house was making me lose my dignity every second.

Yet I want to make things right with Shawn and Liv. Especially Liv. I go back on my phone and I call her.

I feel my heart beat faster then expected as I leaned up. I ended up on voicemail and I knew that was probably a sign that she was upset by me.

Yet I need her to understand. "Hey... it's Torrey. Um, I would like for you to come meet me. I'm at the dormitory in room 6201. I can explain everything... okay um bye" I hang up the phone and breathe out.

I lay on the bed and as I tired to relax myself, I start to hear knocking coming from outside. I wave my hands to the window hoping my room doesn't like a hazard facility.

I knew the expector was coming today since my arrival was in fact unexpected.

I just didn't know it was this early. I mean isn't the break until next week. I walk over to the door and open it.

It took me a minute to realize that I was staring at Maddy. She looks up after looking at her notepad.

Her eyes widen as expected as she clenched her jaw. "You moved in?" She asked going through her paper.

"Yeah.. I already talked to the dean this morning... on the phone"

She stops looking at the pages and looks back at me. Her eyes narrow to my room and she walks in.

I push myself back as I see her scan the room.

"Well hello to you too"

"I don't have time for chit chat. Let's just be professional and get this over with as fast as possible" she said plainly.

I kept my mouth shut as I never saw her like this before. Bothered. She never gets bothered. She's like the most carefree person I know.

I start to hear her sniff as she scans the room, and land her eyes back to me.

"Seriously.. you couldn't wait until next week?" She asked as she grabbed into the bong.

Fuck, I forgot to hide it. I rush over to her and take it.

"It's a antique" I felt my teeth grind as I lied.

She sighs and marks something on her pad. "I'm only letting this slide because I also have an antique" she murmured as I felt myself smile.

Stop it.

"You still have it?" She asked as I looked at her staring at the guitar. She placed the pad down and walks over as she holds onto it.

"If you want it back-"

"No. I just thought after everything... you would hate me enough to throw everything that reminded you of me"she said as her thumb presses against the carved initial.

T.M.

"I could never hate you"

I tried, but it would feel like I was betraying myself. In the end, she made me who I am. She was the only one there for me when Chris died.

My eyes trail up to her as I see her eyes gazed onto mine. "I'm glad you left. Your dad, and that place was hell for you" she said placing the guitar down.

She was right but wish it was due to different circumstances.

"Washroom?"

"In the back" I walked over to the small space hall and opened the door. She squeezed her way in and her body was slightly pressed against mine.

Don't look at her. Don't look at her. Fuck. I look at her as I see her clench her jaw. She looks at me for a second and the door swings open.

There was nothing much to see. Just a toilet, shower tub, sink and a red towel.

She looked deeper though as she walked inside. She plays with the tap. Shit, I forgot to tel her that the tap was a bit rusty.

"Wait Maddy" I walk over to her and BOOM! The water breaks out as the tap falls on the tub. Fuck. Fuck.

"I'm so sorry" she grunted as she tried pressing her hand on the pipe and I get on the tub. I try pressing my hand against it but it dosent bulge.

"Wait I can use the towel" she said as she gets up and lets go as the water splash's between my fingers and onto my face.

"WAIT, NOT MY TOWEL. THE WASHING MACHINE STATION DOESN'T OPEN UNTIL MONDAY"

I cough from the shout as I take off my shirt and press my shirt inside the pipe. The splashing becomes taps as I lean away.

I felt my throat get tight as I burst out laughing. I couldn't control it. I mean this wasn't even funny.

It's just.. nothing ever seems to go the way I want it to. I'm so done being  angry.

"..Are you okay?" Maddy leaned in as she started to laugh to. "No" my voice breaks as I felt my chest tighten.

I can't watch her see me cry. I can't let anyone. I already slipped with Liv,I can't with Maddy.

"It's okay" her laughter fades as I felt her palm go on my cheek as she swipes her finger against my hair pushing it back in the process.

"There are those pretty eyes" she whispered as she softly smiled. I bit my lip trying to control myself.

Her touch reminded me of Liv's. Except Liv's was more warm. Warm enough to make me want her touch on mine longer then needed.

I watch her slowly lean in and for some reason.. I didn't feel anything.

Like numbness.

Just like the drug. "Liv really likes you, and us sneaking around like this... isn't cool. Your here to do a job, stick to it" I get up and her eyes narrow down.

"What's with the change of heart? I thought you guys didn't like each other?"

"I don't need... to like her.. to know that you don't deserve her. And you.. didn't deserve me"

She scoffs as she gets up and looks at me in the eyes. "You.. only care because.... You like her too" she whispered and before I could respond.. I start to hear knocking.