You Don't Know Me | A Andy Gibb What If Story

Chapter 43

"Don't touch me," I remarked.

Andy and I had officially had our first big fight. Both are underslept and have not had enough time with each other recently. Words slipped and we both said some terrible things. But Andy's anger was worse than mine. After he came back from Florida on a weekend trip, things just came to a halt and it became blurry where our love was at. After coming back to my house with Sam, before bed, it all came to a head. 

"Darling, I didn't mean that. You aren't a mistake. I misspoke," he commented as he followed me throughout the house.

I paused.

"Misspoke? That's your excuse?" I asked as I had tears silently streaming down my face.

When I did get angry, I always cried out of frustration. But I didn't want Andy to know that. Yet here we are 6 months into the relationship and things just went into the toilet.

He sighed out of frustration.

"It's not an excuse darling. I love you and I am so sorry for what I said. It wasn't right," he commented.

I looked down at the ground and sniffled.

"You are crying oh my god no I didn't want that at all," he commented as he walked to grab tissues.

"Yeah I uhm cry when I get frustrated," I told him.

Andy came back and he looked defeated just as much as I felt defeated.

"I, I did misspeak and it wasn't anything I really felt. I love you and I don't want this to hurt you anymore," he told me as he wiped the tears from my eyes.

All I could hear in my head was Violet telling me that on the bad days, I had to figure out how to navigate it. I also heard Andy's voice from the Lifetime interview many moons ago and how he was hurt and it was hell for him. I didn't want to be the cause of his pain.

Usually, my coping mechanism during times like this I shut down and don't speak. I isolate myself. This was the first fight that turned into something bigger.

I kept looking down at the ground.  I didn't say anything. 

"I hurt you with my words and that's not what I wanted to do," he commented.

I sighed. My tears stopped flowing and I finally controlled my breathing.

"I need air," is all I could manage to speak.

"Let's go sit outside then," he told me as I began walking towards the back door.

I sat down on the porch steps. He sat down next to me.

Sam was now by us. He could feel the energy from us.

"Darling," he spoke softly.

"I'm trying to collect my thoughts," I commented to him as Sam pushed his nose against me.

"It's understandable darling," Andy told me as he looked down at the ground like I was.

We were so comfortable with each other yet here we were so afraid to speak once more around each other.

"I, well, it hurt me the way you said I wasn't understanding you and that being together was a mistake," I remarked quietly after a few minutes of silence.

Andy turned to look at me.

"I don't feel that way in all due reality darling. Being together isn't a mistake. It was the best decision ever," he told me.

"That's what I thought but then you got all worked up at the fact we hadn't seen each other in a while and I just, I don't know I felt like I was a mistake like you told me. It took me back to my previous relationship as to why I wasn't good enough or loveable," I commented. 

Andy sighed.

"No no no you aren't a mistake. You are the best decision I ever made. What happened in your previous relationships was screw-ups on their end. You do everything right and I just let the bad feelings cloud my eyes and I should not have," Andy explained.

"Andy, you know this wasn't good for either of our hearts. Especially yours," I told him as he found my hand to hold.

It was getting dark and I was tired. I just wanted us to start over from this point on in the relationship.

Andy frowned.

"Yeah, I know darling. I'm so sorry again. I want us to move on and work forward together," he told me as he leaned to kiss my forehead.

I could feel that he meant he was sorry.

"Starting from this moment, let's move on okay?" I told him as I turned my body towards him.

"Okay," he told me as he kissed me gently. 

I stood up off the steps and so did Andy.

We walked inside not saying a word.

I glanced at the clock and it was a little after 5.

"I know it's really early but I want to take a shower," I told him.

"I won't judge you, darling," he told me.

So I went ahead and showered for the night. Even though the typical Saturday nights we spent together weren't totally as planned, at least we came to a compromise.

After I was done, Andy did the same and showered. We kept speaking at a minimum. 

I made some tea for the two of us and brought it to the living room.

I got settled into the big recliner as I waited for Andy. I put the blanket over my lap.

"I figured you'd be in here," he commented from behind the chair. 

I glanced up and he was looking at me.

I kind of smiled.

"Mind if I join you in the chair?" he asked me.

"Come here," I told him as I lifted the blanket for him to join me.

He smiled at me as he also noticed I had two cups of tea waiting.

He adjusted in the chair and I did what I normally did as I leaned on his chest.

"You know, even when we fight I can't stop from loving you," he told me.

"I know. I love you, Andrew," I commented quietly.

He kissed me a few times and we just stayed quiet. 

We drank our tea and decided to eventually go to bed by 10. We were both tired from the day's fight. We did our normal night routines. 

When we went to unmake the bed for the night, Andy paused for a moment and just looked at me.

"What?" I asked as I noticed his stare.

"I would have been the dumbest man alive if I gave this up and lost you," he remarked.

"I mean it would have been a tragedy if you threw away our love," I told him.

"I will never do that. God is my witness," he told me as we climbed into bed comfortably.

A little love and understanding to take place.