Hatchetfield.

The Trail Through Time!

Our story starts over what Tinky called, 'The Game Board'. He stared at the pieces all assembled over it. The intricately assembled pieces of Peter Spankoffski, Stephanie Lauter, Detective Shapiro, Officer Bailey, and a few unnamed side characters all stood in the gymnasium of Hatchetfield Highschool- dancing the night away during prom night. Of course, right outside was Grace Chastity, Black book in her hand, towering over Jason Jepson as she proclaimed him as a dirty dude and was about to kill him- unfortunately the boy got away before she could cast the spell summoning Tinky and his brothers to get rid of the filthy pervert. Ugh. As Tinky looks over from the gameboard, he stares at his brothers, all standing over it as well.

Nibbly was eating his 50th Big Mac of the day. Wiggly and Pokey were discussing the events that had just occurred, with Pokey of course trying to find some 'hidden meaning' within all of it, with Wiggly telling him that it wasn't that deep. And of course, his older brother, Blinky, was sitting beside him, headphones plugged in to his iPad, watching some weird superhero musical. Time to annoy someone. He peers over Blinky's shoulder.

"Whatcha Watchin'?"

Blinky looked up at Tinky. "None of your business."

Tinky rolled his eyes. "C'mon, you don't wanna talk to your ffaaaaaaavvvvvoooooorrrrrite bro?" Tinky pleaded.

"Tink, you're far from my favorite," Blinky snapped back, before turning back to his iPad. Now that was shocking. He was T'noy Karaxis! Everyone loved him!! Well, except the Spankoffskis. Offended, Tinky seemingly turned away from Blinky.

"Fine then. Keep your secrets," He mumbled.

"Uh-huh," Tinky's unsuspecting brother replied.

Tinky then smirked as he, in a flash, turned back and promptly snagged off the cable connecting the headphones to the tablet.

"T'NOY KARAXIS, YOU LITTLE PIECE OF-" Blinky was then cut off by the ear piercing sound of the iconic musical classic, Holy Musical B@man's song, To Be A Man.

"Fuck You!"

"I'm gonna kick your ass!"

"Fuck you!"

"I'm taking you down!"

"FUCK YOU!"

Now dear reader, it may not look like it over text, but these ridiculous song lyrics were being played at full volume for practically everyone to hear.

So naturally, the rest of the Lords in Black immediately started laughing out loud at this sudden noise that filled the room.

"Musical masterpiece, Bravo!"

"This is hysterical!"

"Wow Blinky, and I thought you had taste!" Nibbly remarked. Tinky sat back in his seat smugly. Now this was entertainment!

"I-I do!" Blinky stuttered, as he reached to slap Tinky right in his stupid face, before the eldritch god annoyingly teleported away to the other side of Blinky.

"Really?" Wiggly said. "Weren't you stalking that random family of pioneers over on the Oregon trail a couple hundred years back?"

"Yeah, the ones that you burned down the wagon of and then made fart all over the place," Nibbly confirmed.

"Oh I remember that, How dramatic!!" Pokey said.

"Hey, it wasn't that bad! There were emotional moments here and there!"

This talk of a pioneer family on a trail made Tinky sit up. Now when did this happen? Weren't they doing stuff in Hatchetfield during the 1800's?

"What are you guys talking about?" He asked curiously. Pokey rolled his eyes. Classic Tinky, not remembering anything that happens.

"This was after the stuff in Hatchetfield. Blinky got bored so he figured he could go an' stare at the Oregon Trail for a few decades. He still has the smell of dysentery on him. It was VERY dramatic."

"Huh, interesting..." Tinky thought about it. "Blinky, mind telling me more about?"

"I do mind, but knowing you I have to do it anyway." He took a deep breath before beginning to explain everything. The family, the general store, the bandits, the dysentery, everything. Honestly it sounded hilarious to Tinky. Especially with Pokey's added commentary and drama. It all ended with the gang all getting naked in a lake, now millionaires. The perfect happy ending.

Huh, that got him thinking.... He reached into his pocket and pulled them out. A handful of figurines.... 5 to be exact. He examines them. The one he was staring at in particular had sandy blonde hair and a beard. He resembled a lot of characters they've put in Hatchetfield in the past. Sam Sweetly, John McNamara, Barry Swift, Ken Davidson. He continued fidgeting with these figures in his hand, listening intently to his brothers.

"Blinky?"

"Yeah Tinky?"

He looked up at his brother.

"So it all ended happily right?"

"Yep. We don't do those anymore."

Tinky grins and lets out a sinister chuckle, before carefully, one by one, placing all 5 of the figurines right at the edge of the board. In front of a sign reading, 'Welcome to Hatchetfield.'

"How about, you say, we reverse it?" He looked around the table. No one said anything, but however, they were all in silent agreement as sinister grins appeared on their faces.

The Dikrats family was going on a little, 'Trail Through Time'  to Hatchetfield.