Hatchetfield.

The Canoe Fuckers

Tw: crack ship and wiggly and boy Jerry and horny teenagers, wiggly using uwu language and CANOE RIDINGS BEFORE MARRIAGE

Boy Jerry sighs, putting a picture frame onto the tallest shelf of his cabin, hidden from the campers' sight. The tears stained the desk he sat at, with nothing but the cold air hitting his shoulders. Sure, he had Girl Jeri, but she's just a dirty girl. Who would want to hang out with dirty girls?
Who would like to hang out with girls?

   Who would like girls?

   Boy Jerry reflects on his last thought, not believing he just thought something so sinful. He liked girls. He did not like boys. Why would he like boys? He wasn't gay, he just... hadn't found the right girl.
   "Ring-A-Ling-Ding" sings a bell. 'It's only a matter of time until Christmas break,' Boy Jerry thought, 'but for now, I have to clean up the canoes.'
Just thinking about the canoes made Boy Jerry happy. The canoes were always there for him with their filthy, thrown up, moss-filled floors. It was the only constant in life: clean the crusty canoes after the curfew.

   While Boy Jerry was heading to the canoes in the dark, singing worship music, his eyes caught something. A green light? There was a green light, coming from the woods. 'What if it's something bad?' Jerry thought, while slowly backing away. 'These types of scenarios never end well in movies. I should just go back to the cabin and clean the canoes later.'
   'Wait,' Jerry halted in his thoughts, 'what if it's 2 kids having sex. That can't happen at Camp Idontwannabang.' The fear overwhelmed him. On one hand, it could be a killer. On the other hand, it could be 2 horny teenagers, which is equally as scary!
   'It's now or never,' he thought. He slowly tiptoed towards the glowing light, trying not to make any sounds. He had to turn his own light off in case the green light was leading to something that could see him, leaving him alone in the dark once again.
   Step by step he approached, being careful to not step on any leaf, branch, or twig with all his might. One wrong step and this could be over. All of it. He'd never see his precious canoes again. His beautiful and dirty canoes.
   " ... ok, deep breaths," he whispers to himself, prepared to do whatever he needs to do. As soon as he turns to see what is causing the light, he stops in his tracks. From the corner of his eye, he sees... something? No, someone. Leaned on a tree, He's cradling his legs, his face looking up into the stars. Jerry hears the mystery person whisper, but is too far away to hear it. From afar, the mystery person is kind of... cute?
   Jerry starts approaching it, slowly the sounds of its whisper becoming clearer. It sounded like a melody. A tune written by the stars. Jerry couldn't recognize the words, but they sounded familiar. He started humming along with the melody without even noticing it when- shit. The mysterious person saw him.

   "Hey," boy Jerry's voice trembled, "I-I don't know if you know this, sir, but this is private property."
   The eyes of the mysterious creature looked into Jerry's. They looked hurt, full of pain. "Oh, I'm sorry, pally wal," its voice ricocheting off the millions of trees. His voice brought a strange sense of comfort to the lonely camp counselor. "I was just looking up into the stars, making sure none of them were alien invasions." A smile filled the stranger's face. Jerry had never seen a smile quite like that. It made his face feel warm and his dick feel hard.
   "Oh... that... makes me think you're a lunatic," Jerry responded, kind of scared but also intrigued. The stranger laughs it off, in what Jerry though was the hottest fucking laugh he had ever heard. Jerry approaches the stranger, still leaving good enough room for Jesus, but close enough to see his full face.
   His eyes were Weezer blue, filled with sadness and suffering. His face was puffy, it was clear he had been crying, and his eyebags made it look like he hadn't slept in centuries. His clothes were all green, No shade matching each other. It was clear that he was in pain, but Jerry was too scared to approach it. The stranger kindly parted the eye contact, looking back into the stars. It was clear he wasn't looking for something extraterrestrial.