Poems of Pain and Solitude

daydream

Dear You,

It's been so long.

Where do you belong?

Are you happy with someone new?

Are you carefree without someone to paint blue?

Are you okay? Do smiles fill your day?

Well,

I've been going through hell.

But when my mother asked me, I said I was well.

I've just moved in my new apartment

But everything feels so virulent.

The walls close in, all of them devouring.

Reflections of emptiness come flickering.

When I whisper, my frail voice echoes,

Silence ringing wherever I go,

Reminding me that the only shadow

That's here to follow,

Is the one I own.

The one that sits here all alone.

But last night I had a dream.

I saw you again, only a glance away,

I saw you beam, I saw you gleam,

I felt warmth warm like a month of May,

You donned a smile like a dazzling jewel

That looked nothing cruel.

It reminded me of the past blue skies

And the glitter that glistened in blue eyes

Back when they were still mine to love.

It reminded me of the past stars

And the wishes and dreams that were made from afar,

Back when they were still mine to yearn for.

My mind flashed blinding lights

And a million blurry sights.

Your arms wrapped around my body

Like they were some second skin

That would sink in,

With a brush of lips you'd saved just for me.

All the nights spent dreaming about a future

About something that was always better.

All the fights spent crying for something right

Not something that killed with spite.

All the flights spent laughing from above

Brushing shoulders and being so desperately in love.

In this dream I remembered it all

How I fell like leaves in the fall

Softly but sure to be caught by safe ground.

I remembered the feeling of being found,

I remembered what it felt like to feel safe,

And all the gentleness you gave.

All the forevers that were said,

Not knowing they'd all be dead.

Believing in all the promises