Highway to Heaven 🔞

34. 소중한

Although he knew it was coming, Matthew could not take the pain well. Yes the pictures were deleted, yes Jiwoong's name was cleared by his loyal fans but there were still people, or anti fans, or haters talking about it, in one platform or another. Hanbin strictly forbid him to look at those, but curiosity is a bitch. Matthew would find himself, every night, looking at those. He would find swelling pain in his chest, not only because of the online abuse- he was missing his boyfriend.

Since the incident, Jiwoong had been prohibited to talk to him. No call, no text, no meet up, nothing. The agency had released a statement of the pictures being fake, and that they were looking into it. They didn't directly talk about Jiwoong's sexuality, but there was a clear indication that the one who spread the pictures had a strong urge to make him look gay, which wasn't even true. It's as if, him being interested in a man had been a crime, and the only criminals are them- the only victims, the only sufferers.

Matthew was lucky to have his friends though. Since the vacation, Hanbin was always there for him. Sometimes Zhang Hao as well. They were the absolute sweethearts to him. You'd think Hao would feel jealous cause of Hanbin's sense of protection over his best friend but no, Hao wasn't shallow. He rather acted like Matthew had been his son, always thinking about keeping him cheerful. Gyuvin would join sometimes, even Taerae, the very recent friend would call and keep up.

The only one who wasn't there was unfortunately the one Matthew needed the most. Because although he pretended to smile and enjoy, no one was able to make him as happy as one single text from the man could. Too bad, that was kind of impossible to attain at that moment.

Like every night, Matthew had gone to his room around midnight. Hanbin insisted that they stay up a bit more, but the younger knew he was taking a lot of his friend's time, the time he should be giving to his boyfriend. So he acted sleepy, in order for the other to go and text slash call his man.

And Matthew, he took a spot on the bed, took out his phone. He didn't have a set goal, so he just randomly went through apps, doing this and that. Soon, his instincts took him to check on the current situation regarding his actor boyfriend, and he started missing the man. He saw all the good and bad, but the emptiness came from within. It had been about a week- a week of no contact- physical or even virtual. Matthew craved his boyfriend's presence- just that, in any form. He hugged his frame, resisting the urge to cry. He tried to be strong. Jiwoong was going through a hard time, if being his lover, Matthew couldn't stand the ups and downs, then he doesn't deserve walking alongside the man. Logic told him to stop being a needy bitch, but his emotions betrayed him. He found himself in a pit of darkness, no one there to pull him out. It kept going on and on and on.. minutes passed, to an hour, and a half more. It was around 1:30 when he heard knocks on the door.

He thought it came from the door to his room, he thought Hanbin had come up to check on him. But when he opened the door, there was no one. The knocks were still there. So it came from the main entrance. Matthew carefully went to check. He had received online death threats for being 'Jiwong's boy toy'. Although those were kinda like empty threats as no one knew his identity yet, he was still scared. He carefully checked who had knocked, only a person in all black- like head to toe covered in black clothing stood there.

Should he open up?

Matthew asked who it was. The man stood there, silent.

"I'm not gonna open up unless you tell me who you are."

"It's me." The man answered. Matthew might be insane with his imagination, cause it sounded so close to heart! And so, without thinking twice, he opened the door. The man entered and closed the door in a rush. Matthew took two steps back, carefully looking at the guy. His heart was jumping in its cage.