Enveloped with Love! (Taekook)

CHAPTER I

November 2nd, 2021 - Busan

The hands of the clock moved steadily and the sound of each tick of the thinnest hand rang in his ears creating a rhythm that steadily got on Jeongguk's nerves. He sat stoically at the doctor's office and watched as time slowly moved past him as if he had any to waste. Funny concept, time. Slows down painfully when you want it to be quick and speeds up when you want to hold on!

He watched his parents shoot question after question at the doctor who had, in Jeongguk's opinion, said all that he could and now was simply being polite to not kick his dads out.

Yes, Jeon Jeongguk was the only son of Jeon Woosung and Jeon Jungmin. Both were amazing fathers to him and as expected of any parent, both were in tears and almost on the verge of begging.

It was not the first time for Jeongguk to witness something like this. The last five years were exactly this way since he had been diagnosed with third stage CKD. Chronic Kidney Disease was what it was called but chronic killing disease would be a better term, he mused. Because although the disease had not claimed his life yet, it had killed his hopes and all of his dreams.

It had struck untimely, without any warning and snuffed out all good things from his life. Jeongguk was a painting prodigy. He had painted his first masterpiece which was sold for a whopping $100,000 at the age of 10 and there was no looking back from there. He didn't know how he did it. He simply had held the paintbrush and a few hours later, or more like 17, a masterpiece was born.

Now at 25, he still doesn't know how he does it. Fifteen years and almost 150 paintings later, he still doesn't understand the art that flowed through him when he painted. But that was before all this sickness mess. Jeongguk hadn't been able to paint at all for almost a year. 

Painting was everything to Jeongguk. Since he started so young, he doesn't remember a time where he was not painting. It was as if painting was a part of himself, not just something he did. It gave him not only a purpose, but it was the reason for his life. Nothing gave him joy like that he got when he painted. The colors, the canvases, the easels, the brushes were everything he could ever dream of experiencing. Painting was not just a hobby for him, it was like meditation. It was his strength and his comfort, his passion and his salvation. It transported him to a different dimension where he could only feel peace, calm and serenity.

At first, when the disease was new, Jeongguk had held on to all hope and so had his parents. But slowly the toll of the treatments, the weekly dialysis, the stress and uncertainty of the transplant had drained all of them of precious life energy. Now that he hasn't painted in a year, he feels as if he's already dead on the inside merely going through the motions of sustaining his body. The blank canvases, squeaky clean easels and brushes, and untouched tubes of paint haunt him day and night.

What is Jeon Jeongguk if not an artist? Yes, he has a college degree but his identity was that of an artist. For him, it's as if Jeon Jeongguk is nothing if not an artist.

It took everything away from him. His friends, his boyfriend and even his dads. Yes, they're with him but he doesn't recognize them anymore. His dads who were a lively and vibrant couple looked like they'd aged a hundred years suddenly. They don't laugh as much nor do they do anything else other than fuss about his consistently deteriorating health.

The disease had knocked at his door when he was 20 at the third stage. Five years later, it's at the last stage and Jeongguk's listening to the doctor tell them the same thing he had told them 2 years ago. The transplant had failed. Again. And he was to go back on dialysis to survive.

When it had failed the first time, Jeongguk had gone through all the stages of grief. It's as if he had lost someone very dear to him and was grieving a lost life when it was just a lost kidney. Some might say it's kind of the same thing since that kidney was supposed to give him life. Now both his parents were down one kidney and he had none! He couldn't help but feel guilty at putting both his dads at risk with only one kidney each apart from all the stress and pain of the surgery they had to bear. They were not a great donor match to begin with but since Jeongguk was adopted from the orphanage, there was no way he could get a perfect match. Now his last option was to go on the transplant list and there was no way to know how long it would be before he found a match, if at all.