An Unpredicted "Us"

This Was Our Goodbye

I stand here staring at him. A part of me wants to run and not give the option to kiss him. Another part of me wants to throw myself at him and let his tongue explore my body. And that is why I am so terrified to kiss him. I'm afraid I am going to want more. It's like he's my addiction and I've only had him once. That bathroom incident doesn't count, but it's up there on the 'fuck-me' list.

I suck in the air and let my nerves slowly leave my body. I step toward him; his head still leans against the wall. "Straighten yourself out!" I command with a shakiness in my tone.

He turns toward me. He's not acting like a child, but it's not far from it. I don't blame him, but I don't like it either.

I swallow that knot in my throat and try to mentally prepare myself for this 'goodbye' kiss. He's not getting more than a five-second flash of my tongue and that's it.

I take another breath and step closer to him, so close I can feel his light breaths against my face and the smell of cherry and rum...maybe? He doesn't drink often. Did he drink to ease his nerves? Maybe I should have drank a little.

I blow out a nervous breath. "Okay," I say and slowly close in toward his lips. "A quick five-second kiss and that is it!"

"Deal..." He whispers and within a millisecond my body falls off the earth and lands on our world.

His hot, inviting, and sensual lips press softly against mine. It's not a hard kiss. It's soft and slow. My heart begins to pump blood faster and faster. My head feels numb from a lack of oxygen. My pussy is throbbing, but let's get real, that's been throbbing since I walked in. His hands slowly slide across my hips. I part my lips to allow his tongue to gently slide into my mouth and it's like a warm light entering my body.

Five seconds are up! Five seconds are up! Stop!

His hands against my waist remind me of when I first slide my body into a warm bathtub. It's so soft, wanting, comforting, and needed. His mouth pressed against mine feels like it's right where it's supposed to be. The 'world' we created removes all of my problems and it's just us in this fucking world! And I love it!

I did not come here to kiss him. I came here to say goodbye. I need to peel myself away from him. I am not going to lose Lacey for selfish reasons. OH! But it feels so fucking right! The way his tongue slides against mine. The way he grips his hands around my waist. The way he takes control.

I peel my lips off his, lower my head, and wipe them. "Five seconds are up," I whisper, barely audible. "Goodbye, Ryan."

I'm struggling to leave but, I grab my wallet, turn back around, and ignore his eyes while I walk toward the front door. I can't swallow because my throat is frozen tight. I can't think because my brain feels like it's on shutdown. I'm surprised I can fucking walk.

"Hannah." His tone is so soft and deep.

I stop, refusing to look back. "What! Ryan!"

"If this was another world. Would you and I..."
"Yes!" I interrupt him through gritted teeth. "I think you already knew that answer though. Yes, we would be something. But this isn't that life. This is a life with Lacey and even without Lacey there are too many obstacles for us to exist in this world together."

"Thank you." There is a comfort in his tone. Almost like...Closure!

I look over my shoulder and see the expression on his face and I want to kiss that expression...I should be out the front door and gone! But I begin walking toward him.