DBS#3: Mending the Scars

IKA-LIMAMPU'T ISA

Totoo nga na mas mabilis na lumilipas ang panahon kapag masaya ka. Akalain mong parang isang kisapmata lang ang lahat nang nangyari nitong mga nakaraan. From getting to know Top, knowing he’s sick, got diagnosed with cancer, and now we’re currently in the hospital for his next session of chemotherapy.

Hindi ko alam kung bakit kung anong bilis ng pagdaan ng mga araw ay siya ring bilis ng paglala ng sakit niya. Ang dating chronic myeloid leukemia ay naging acute myeloid leukemia kaagad within the span of just a month. The cancer he has now is a very aggressive one, so we need to have intense treatment. Siguro nga ay nahuli kami nang malaman naming may sakit siya. Kung kailan unti-unti nang lumalala at kumakalat ang mga cancer cells, tsaka lang namin nalaman ang tungkol dito.

Kasabay ng unang araw ng semestral break namin ang naging unang araw ng chemotherapy niya. The first week on his chemotherapy was hell. As much as I wanted to stay calm, I couldn’t. Iba pala sa pakiramdam kapag iyong taong mahal mo na ang binabantayan mo sa hospital at hindi na ibang pasyente.

Today, he’ll be having two different types of chemotherapy. This will last for another fourteen days straight, and then off for another fourteen days to do another biopsy. But because of these treatments, there are some circumstances in which his blood counts were very low and he needed multiple blood and platelet transfusions. Dahil sa pagbaba ng blood counts niya, mataas ang risks na magkaroon siya ng iba pang mga infections. This is just one of the unfortunate side effects of chemotherapy. The thing Uncle Julio reminded us of before this whole thing happened.

I did a lot of research about everything I needed to know to take care of him. Mabuti na lang talaga at wala kaming pasok para mabantayan ko siya rito sa hospital. He’s currently sleeping like a rock because of the medicine he took last night. Seeing him sleep this peacefully makes me tear up. I’m trying to look strong in front of him so he won’t be worried about me. But a lot of times, lalo na kapag tulog siya, tsaka ko lang nailalabas lahat ng sakit na naiipon sa akin. Hindi ko kayang makita siyang ganito, pero mas lalong hindi ko kayang hindi na siya makita kahit kailan.

“Good morning, doc,” formal kong bati kay uncle nang pumasok siya sa room ni Top.

Mag-isa siya at sa tingin ko ay hindi si Top ang mismong sadya niya. He scanned the whole room, looking for something or… someone.

“Where’s his family? May kailangan akong i-discuss sa kanila.”

“Umuwi lang po sandali ang mother niya. Ang kapatid niya naman ay  papunta na.”

I already met his parents. Mabait at halatang mapagbiro rin ang nanay at tatay niya. Alam ko na kaagad kung kanino silang dalawa nagmana. Ngayon ko lang din nalaman na may kapatid pa pala silang isa pa na sumunod kay Top. Babae ito at nag-aaral pa ng grade school. Hindi nga lang sinasama rito dahil wala pa ito sa wastong gulang. Isa pa, delikado rin ang mamalagi siya sa hospital, baka mamaya ay magkasakit din siya.

“Kung ganoon, ikaw na lang muna ang kakausapin ko,” he said with a straight face.

“What is it, uncle?”

Sana naman ay hindi ito masamang balita. It’s been weeks since I became anxious about the results of every test that Top had taken.

“I already have the results of his blood tests, and his neutrophils were too low. In this case, we have to hold the treatment until next week. Thus, I have to give him shots to boost his white blood cell count.”

“You mean, walang schedule ng chemotherapy ngayon?”

Top needs two rounds of chemotherapy. Masyadong mahaba ang gamutan na kailangan para sa sakit niya, pero once na natapos na ang dalawang rounds ng chemo at normal na ang blood cell counts niya, puwede na siyang kuhaan ng dugo at bone marrow samples para tingnan ang mga leukemia cells. If no leukemia cells can be seen under the microscope, this means he is in remission, which is the first step towards curing AML.