Adam was many things, the first man, Dickmaster, the first human soul into heaven, likely the world's biggest rock fan and overall amazing fucking person in his opinion.
What he was NOT was a fucking mind reader. He has been at the hotel for a while now but that didn't mean he knew where everything was in that shit hole.
It was like Charlie just expected him to know. Stupid bitch. Adam has a vague memory of her explaining everything to him but that doesn't fucking matter, he shouldn't have to do this community service bullshit to begin with. How in the fuck were peeling potatoes going to get him home to heaven?
For the last twenty minutes Adam had been looking for the stupid peeler. He swore they moved it around on him just to be a bunch of little assholes. He slammed the drawer shut and stomped out of the kitchen. "Charlie! Where the fuck are you?" He yelled out. He hated having to fucking ask her where shit was but he'd be in the all damn day. It took him a whole afternoon to figure out the can opener and he's still pissed about it.
Adam heard voices coming from the lobby. Of course little miss princess was off having a nice relaxing time, probably with her bitch girlfriend. Adam ground him teeth together at the thought. He deserves relaxation too!
Adam angrily made his way to the lobby. "Charlie, where the fuck is--" The sentence died in his throat when he came into the room. This was bad. Standing over Angel Dust who was on the couch curled up in fear was a moth like looking man. Valentino, Adams mind supplied. One of the few people Lucifer and Charlie told him to stay the fuck away from.
Now Adam would never back down from a fight, but he wasn't a complete idiot. The look Valentino gave him when his red eyes locked with Adams golden ones made a sick pit feeling in his gut. He should leave, NOW. "You're not Charlie, I'll go."
"Not so fast." In a blink of an eye the moth was directly in front of Adam. "What's the hurry? Adam, right? First man, angel turned sinner?"
"Val, leave him alo-" Angel Dust chimed in.
"Shut up cunt!" Val roared, eyes flashing with malicious intent. Angel winced.
Now, Adam and Angel weren't exactly friends, but hearing this fucker talk to him that way didn't sit right with Adam.
"Hey! Lay off of him twat stain." Adam growled. The only regret was now he had Val's full attention.
Val took a long drag off of his cigarette and blew the red smoke into Adams face. Adam coughed and tried to shoo the smoke away. Adam has never smoked before, cigarettes didn't exist when he was on earth and they didn't have any type of drugs in heaven.
Val circled him like a shark as he spoke. "I could make you a huge star you know? You are a very attractive man, you'd make it big. Maybe as big as Angel Dust over there." He chuckled darkly. The smell of the smoke was making Adam dizzy, but he kept his glare in place. Val stopped in front of him again. " You may look the part of a sinner, but your eyes," he leaned in closer to Adam. "Give you away, they are heavenly."
Adam thought he was going to throw up. His heart beat hard against his ribcage. He was so fucking angry but he knew this guy could kill him before he even got his first in the air.
"Hmm~ Yes a fallen angel, that's bound to be somebody's kink~" Val stroked Adams jaw line with the tip of his finger until in rested under his chin, smile cruel and hungry.
It was as if lightening had struck down, that is how fast Lucifer was there to be in-between Val and Adam. Not only did this surprise Adam, but Lucifers full demon form was out on full display, horns and all. He had one hand on Adams chest keeping him out of Val's reach while the other was fisted in the moths ugly sweater. "Yeah? Well my kink is smashing bugs, roach." Lucifers voice was even full demonic.

YOU ARE READING
𝐇𝐇 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒 𝐆𝐔𝐈𝐃𝐄 - Hazbin Hotel
FanfictionHi guys, this is what I call a shippers guide, a guide to your new favorite ships with stories added to each chapter. Some of these are oneshots others are just full on stories that im to lazy to actually make a actual story about. Now, there ar...