𝐇𝐇 𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐏𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒 𝐆𝐔𝐈𝐃𝐄 - Hazbin Hotel

pt 11

Alastor sighed, clasping his hands together under his chin as he looked intently at everyone present in that place at his request.

It had been a long time ago. Or really, ever since he had climbed to his position of overlord at the cost of all the chaos and deaths he produced for delight and status, he knew it would be him first and foremost. He was the most important thing to himself and the matter had to continue that way if he wanted to climb even higher. However, he had to admit that along the way he had met others who managed to gain some of his respect even though it would never have crossed his mind to label them as friends.

Friends...

He had never had them while alive, let alone dead. If anything, people who had earned his respect due to many reasons deserved to be called colleagues, which was how Zestial, Carmilla and Rosie referred to him. Well, perhaps his relationship with the latter was a bit different since they were both closer for other causes. Not for nothing had he turned to Rosie when it came to showing that "weak" side that no one had the chance to see before.

However, things were different now. And as much as his head was a chaos of ideas, memories and strange emotions, he had to make an effort to express what had been going through his mind every time the damned nightmare reappeared as if it wanted to intentionally torture him until he finally lost his mind.

It was either that or kill Clauneck. And he already knew that the latter option could not even be considered and even more so considering that he had tried.

Damn it, he had really tried.

Every night, before going to sleep, he had tried to end his life in a clean way. One where the baby felt no pain due to the speed of the act itself but he couldn't do it. Alastor simply couldn't do it. His claws always faltered as did his whole being. And that made him feel worse. It made him feel that his ability to get rid of everything he considered a hindrance had become useless. Leaving only a memory of what was once a part of him.

And yet, he didn't blame Clauneck. But something inside him did not accept his existence.

He knew the problem was his. He knew he should have investigated what was happening to him. He knew this was too weird to be interpreted as just simple rejection. And he also knew that he would never have been able to figure it out on his own because his head didn't want to cooperate.

He was fed up. He needed a solution now or he would surely end up isolating himself, which was the sudden feeling that had flooded him these days.

That was why he had called Carmilla. And also why now Zestial and Rosie were accompanying them.

"Clauneck is nearing his one month birthday" He mentioned with his usual tone, glancing at the child who continued to be cuddled in Carmilla's arms "And that makes it require to make a deal with yourselves."

Everyone changed their expressions to more serious ones. No one expected that, not even Lucifer himself who was still hiding in one of the corners.

"You know it's not necessary to make a deal to keep quiet, Alastor" Spoke the woman with silver-haired and red-eyed "I had promised you when I found out."

The named waved one of his hands by way of disagreement "I know, my dear. That's not what I'm talking about. Actually my motives are quite different" he straightened his back "I don't want a deal involving your souls, I think you already know that" The three of them grimaced in complicity. Of course they knew that, so many years of knowing each other had made many things clear "Besides, I can't give up my soul either because unfortunately it doesn't belong to me."