HIS REGRET (1st BOOK) 18+

TWENTY TWO : QUADE

I drive back to my home,how can I fix this,how can I fix US?
My head hurts badly again,I enter the shop only to see CLEO sitting there waiting for me,what is she doing here again?
And how did she enter the shop,that idiot Ryan must have let her in.
"What are doing here Cleo,it's 8pm shouldn't you be with your husband right now",I tell her.
"Yeah I should but I came here to give you something but before that I need to talk to you",she tells.
My head is aching already,I Don't want to listen to any bullshit right now,so I turned to tell her to go away but she talks before I can say anything.

"Did you tell Nea,why you started dating her?",Cleo asks me out of nowhere.
"Why would you bring up that right now?",I ask her.
"What do you mean why,she has the right to know the truth",she says.
"SHE LOVES YOU QUADE,YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO HER" ,she tells.
I suddenly feel like I'm out of oxygen,NEA LOVES ME,I know she does, but I'm the problem.
"I know,I thought of telling her soon but what am I supposed to say?"
"That I started dating because I wanted to make you jealous,that I thought if I date someone else you might come back to me?"
"Yeah,tell me Cleo what am I supposed to say?",I yell at her.

I hear a bell rang at the door of my shop,my heart nearly drops when I see Nea,I panic,did she hear?
"NEA",I go to her,when I try to touch her,she pushes me back.
She heard it,isn't it?
"Nea,please let me explain",I beg her.
She puts a hand between us stopping me,
"What will you explain Quade?",she asks sarcastically.
"Nea please",I PLEAD again.
"I thought I was harsh on you earlier,so I came here to see you and what I hear?,that you fucking used me to make someone else jealous?"
"And here I thought you were always pushing me away because,you lost your mom whom you loved too much,I thought you were afraid to love someone,but that's not the case".

"Nea,Nea....I...I know I made a mistake",
"Mistake,seriously Quade?,
You fucking used me,you played with my feelings,you misused my kindness,I should've walked out from your life the day you said you liked someone else,only if I did I would've...",she trails off.
"I was just your experiment,you experimented on me to impress someone else,I can't believe that I was just a mere experiment to you",she says.
When I look at her,I see TEARS,that's it,I knew I lost her,I lost the only precious thing I had in my life.
My eyes fills with tears,I'm trying to control but I can't.
"You should've told her Quade",Cleo says behind me,
"I wanted to but everytime I thought of telling her,I was feeling guilty",I say.

"So I was your guilt trip all along?,NEA says,
I came to you,didn't I?
I asked you if you wanted to end this relationship,why didn't you say YES?",she yells.
"I was afraid",I tell her unable to meet her eyes.
"Afraid of what,oh right you must've been afraid that your fucking experiment would fail,right?",she yells.
"Why would you do this to me Quade,have I ever did something to hurt you?",she says,her voice breaking and I shake my head.
"Then why didn't you leave me sooner,only if you did,it wouldn't have hurt me this much,
I wouldn't have loved you this much,
How will I forget you?
How will I ever trust anyone else?
How will I ever....",she trails off again.

Her eyes telling me and asking me a million things,I don't dare to look at her eyes,I just stare down,I will listen to her,because I fucking deserve it for what I did to her.

"How did I never knew that all along you loved someone else?
How can I be so stupid to fall in love with you so easily?
How did I never knew that you were pushing me away because there was already someone else whom you loved",she cries out.
"I don't love her Nea",I tell her.
"It doesn't matter anymore Quade",she says and I just stand there like an asshole that I am.

"Why did you kiss me?
Why did you sleep with me?
Was it also because you wanted to show her?",she says and I immediately shake my head.
I feel like there are hundreds of arrows aimed at me,digging one by one into my heart.
"No Nea,I did it because I wanted to",I tell her.

"Nea,please don't hate me,I'm not here to take what's yours",Cleo says.
"WHAT'S MINE SERIOUSLY?,
YEAH I DO HATE WHEN SOMEONE TAKES WHAT'S MINE BUT HOW CAN I HATE YOU,WHEN HE WAS NEVER MINE IN THE FIRST PLACE",she tells and I feel like my heart will stop beating at any moment.

"Why Don't you fucking talk Quade,answer to me,why the fuck did you do it,was it fun watching me love you like mad girl that I was?
Did you enjoy when I told you that I loved you,was I sounding like a stupid person?",she yells.
"I'm so sorry Nea,I really am sorry", I apologize to her,though it will never be enough.

"After all this,you could only be able to say sorry",she says.
"I don't want to be in this relationship and I Don't want to see your face again,don't you fucking dare ever show your face to me",she says.
I hear door bell ring again,I see at the door as I see her disappear.

"Why don't you fucking go behind her?",Cleo yells at me.
"Why are you even here Cleo?",I ask her quietly,almost like a whisper,I don't want to talk,I Don't want to listen or Don't want to do anything.
"I came here to give you a invitation of my marriage with Rio,we are getting married again,this time with real vows",she tells me and I nod.
"When is it?",I ask her.
"On this Friday,there's this small get-together party,and on Saturday of next week,we are getting married",she says.
"Congratulations Cleo,I am so happy for you",I tell her honestly.
"Quade you need to make it clear with Nea,I saw the pics on social media and I can tell you,you were looking the happiest with her",she tells me,making me remember the pictures I saw in Nea's room,my heart aches at the memory.
"Don't worry she will come back to me",I tell her.
"What if this time she won't come back at all?",she says making me anxious.
"I know she will",I defend.
SHE WILL COME BACK TO ME,RIGHT?

"Take care Quade and take care of her too",she tells as she walks out of the door,
I sit there and all I could see was Nea crying,I fucking pushed her to the edge that ended up hurting her so much,that she ended up crying,she never cried,I never saw,but today I made her cry,I feel so pathetic.
I should give her some time,I will wait until she comes back.