Admiring Its Glorious Miracle (Typographic Editing)

Epilogue (Last Part) |✓

Epilogue (Last Part)

TW: self-ham, suicidal despair.

"I am in love with a woman that Zach loved."

I was blankly staring at the screen of my iPad, Eunice and I were having facetime. I told her about what I did, I am not stealing Zach's beloved right? I am not committing any sin right? I was just loving someone that I love. This is the first time having a girlfriend and I'm scared as fuck.

I watch Eunice's reaction but she doesn't have any, she was just staring at it as if she's waiting for me to say more but that's the only thing that I want to say. I just want to watch her reaction and I want to hear her opinion about it. I don't know if she's mad or not because of her reaction.

"Why aren't you saying anything?" I asked after minutes of being silent.

She finally sighed and looked at me straight, "You want my opinion? Because for all I know you want my reaction."

"You got it right, my cousin," I raised my thumbs up and showed it to her. "They say other's opinions don't matter but you're not others to me and I need your opinion."

"I know that you liked her, the fact that you give her your work means a lot to us already because you're not that kind of person, giving your work to someone you don't like. It was like you're giving your work to someone because you like them, you like to watch their reaction, you want them to like you. That's you, Joshua. You like giving because you want them to know that you exist in this world. How do I know that? Zach told me anything but he doesn't know that you like her, it was just me." I was just staring at her while she did the talk.

I blinked, "It wasn't like that—"

"It is, Joshua." She didn't let me finish my words. "But It's okay to me, there's no problem with that and you're not committing any sin."

I blinked again thinking what she's talking about, was I like that? But for all I know, I didn't like her that time because she hates me and I know that time that she's in love with my cousin and I just did my work that time because I wanted to say a thank you to her because I used her as my reference and I didn't even ask permission.

Is that even possible? For all I know, I started this kind of feeling when we stepped in Senior High School days. I saw Eunice looked at me, watching my reaction too. She didn't say anything until I ended the call, my confusion didn't end even when my parents saw it.

"Nak, okay ka lang?" Dad asked me and I nodded as my response.

I was just quite the whole eating time until my friends arrived. I was just quiet and didn't say anything but I could feel their looks and their sharing looks to each other but never asked.

"Saan ka pupunta?" Jayden asked when I walked on the other way. I saw how Lucius dudge his side.

"Sa Library lang." I simply answered

"Hindi ka nagbabasa ng libro, Joshua." Ian pointed out, I rolled my eyes and raised my middle finger to them.

"Iba na ngayon," I put my down finger and raised my other hand and showed a books. "Babalik ko lang ang librong hiniram ko."

It's not a book that is related to my subjects, it's a book that is related to her subjects because I want to help her with her assignments dahil she's tamad sometimes not wanting to do it and just asked for answer to her friends na nang-give din naman sa kan'ya.

Never in my life have I done this kind of thing and I am willing to do anything for her, just for her, I am even willing to risk everything for her. I remembered what I did when she passed out having a nosebleed, maybe because it was too hot that day and I waited outside of her room, ditching my afternoon class and it was my first time ditching my class.