HAVING 13 - Johnny Kavanagh

20. You always hurt the ones you love

JOEY

Either my five siblings had fucked off, or Da had killed them, because I couldn't find any of them at home.

When I walked in, he immediately started demanding I go look for Melissa, because, apparently, she had taken all the kids away.

Thank fuck. He was in a nasty mood and had a bottle of whiskey resting on his lap.

I went upstairs first, nearly stumbling down the stairs due to my crossfaded state.

First, I looked in Shan and Missy's room. No sight of them.

Then, I looked for Tadhg, Ollie and Sean. They weren't in their room either.

I checked my own room. Surprisingly, not there either.

They wouldn't be in Mam and Da's room, but I checked either way. Mam was sitting on the bed with her eyes wide open.

"Mam," I tried. She didn't budge. "Did Melissa tell you where she was taking them?"

"She took my kids," Mam whispered. "She's acting like they're hers."

"He's blowing up. She's keeping them safe," I scoffed. "You don't."

"He should've burned her face off," Mam just mumbled.

I furrowed my brows at her sudden graphic threat and sighed in defeat. "Goodnight."

No reply. No surprises there.

Finally, I checked in the bathroom, and there was no bruised kid in there either. Yeah, they were gone.

I pulled out my phone, falling back into my bed. No answer from Aoife. I was in the doghouse. There was a message from Melissa, though, an hour ago. I replied.

Missy: Taking them to a friend's house for the night

Me: Text me the address and be safe

A minute later, she sent me the address. I had an idea of where it was. It was a street full of mansions, so my head immediately jumped to Taggart Brady. According to Missy, though, they were done and had been for a year. Good thing; Brady was a sanctimonious dickhead.

Missy had been acting weird for the previous month. She kept staying late after work, dolling up to go to school and listening to Guns N' Roses every day while she never used to.

She'd met someone. I knew she went both ways, and it didn't matter to me, but it was looking like she'd gotten herself a boy at Tommen.

She just needed to be careful. Us Lynches always hurt the ones we love, neither did I want a repeat of December 2002 to January 2004.

Taggart fucking Brady, that asshole. Melissa didn't want to face it, even now, but an adult dragging a very crossfaded fourteen year old into a bedroom on Christmas was rape. I didn't know until much later, if I did I would've killed him on the spot, trust me.

A while later, she was manipulated into dating him. During the months she was on with him, she would disappear for weeks on end. That's all I knew. She would eventually turn up in the middle of the night, with a variety of bruises.

I had an idea of what the lad was doing to her. He was like Da and she was Mam. Not that she and Mam were anything alike, but Brady and my Father definitely were.

The main difference between her and Mam was that she didn't ever ask for my help. The only time I could remember her asking for anything was that one night. January 2004, she called me to pick her up. I don't think she ever went back to him after that.

I should've helped her, but I couldn't. There was Mam, Da and Shannon. Then there was also Shane Holland.

I just hoped this new person of hers was better. Hell, I hoped she found herself someone like Aoife.

I needed my sister to put herself first for once. To love blindly, like I loved Aoife, despite the fear of allowing someone to love you back.

I needed someone who could help her carry the weight on her shoulders. Someone who made her head go quiet in the way my Aoife did mine.

I wanted a good thing in my sister's life, because she was the person who most deserved it.