The Tour

53

The soft warmth of sunlight filtered through the thin tour bus curtains, the small bunk room was quiet except for the faint hum of the traffic outside. I wasn't sure if I'd actually slept at all or if I'd just been lying awake with my own thoughts swirling around in my head. The small space beside me was empty and for a moment I began to wonder if I'd imagined everything from last night.

Was it all a bad dream. But then I realised the empty space is where Oli should be and the weight of it all came rushing back. Did he even stay with me last night? Or was he up for just as much of the night as I was? A light cough interrupted my thoughts as I looked to my left and smiled

"Morning" Oli's voice drifted though the small door. I hadn't even heard him rustling around in the kitchen next door but there he was, his voice like a lifeline. "I got you something" he said as I realised he had two cups of tea in his hands.

His eyes were soft but there was a trace of concern in them as though he wasn't sure how I'd be this morning. But who could blame him after last night.

"Tea?" He said holding out the cup as I gave him a small smile and took it from his hands

"Thank you" I said quietly taking a sip. The familiar taste was a small comfort. A moment of calm before the storm. A piece of home even.

Oli sat down next to me on the bed, his presence causing me more comfort than he'd ever know. He studied me for a split second before laying next to me and crossing his arms

"You okay?" He asked gently

"I'm fine I lied through the trimmer in my voice "just tired"

"Mm" he hummed in acknowledgment "after last night I think we both are"

I didn't say anything for a moment. I just stared into my cup, feeling the steam rise in little curls. He was right. The events of last night had drained me in ways I hadn't expected. But now there was something else there as well. Something I'd been avoiding, knowing it was coming but dreading at the same time.

Oli cleared his throat and looked at me with a side eye, a little nervous but he suddenly spoke

"Look... I know you're probably not in the mood for this but..." he trailed off, and I glanced at him. There was a strange tightness in his jaw as though he was choosing his next words carefully

"What is it" I asked sensing the shift in his energy. He hesitated, then glanced over to the small shelves next to the bed where his phone sat charging.

"The 5sos album is out" he said as I nodded slowly, the usual pit in my stomach appearing. How could I not know? As if Luke didn't use it against me last night. Luke's voice, 5sos' music was bound to be everywhere today. Whether I wanted to or not, the world was going to hear his version of things. His side of the story.

"I know" I muttered not really meeting Oli's eyes as he took a deep breath setting his own cup of tea down on the shelves beside him

"Did you want to listen to it?" He asked as I froze leaving the question hanging.

I should say no and walk away from the situation and not give anymore thought or attention to Luke. But deep down I know I can't avoid this forever. This album had happened whether I liked it or not.

I finally met Oli's gaze, his eyes full of something I couldn't quite read... maybe a little worry or maybe just uncertainty. Either way I didn't recognise anything in his current expression. He was giving me a choice even if the choice was painful.

"Yeah" I said softly,my voice almost a whisper "Let's listen to it" I said as Oli nodded and picked up his phone from the shelve and began searching for the album on Spotify before looking my way again