What Life Stole From Me

Chapter Thirty-Six

I thought I could get used to the Idea of her.
I thought that there'd come a time in my life when I'd actually get accustomed to the idea of Sarah.
But time stood to prove me wrong.

What I felt for her,I'd never known anything quite like it.
In my life,She was like the sun that brightens a dull day,and chase the clouds away together with my worries.

Her mind was so pure,yet so fragile.
She was so vulnerable and delicate,anytime I looked at Her,I felt a mixture of emotions wash through me. Of happiness and of Hurt.

Of happiness because she was mine and I had the privilege of loving her. Of happiness because I knew she deserved the world and everything in it and that was exactly what I was going to give her
Of sadness because She'd been hurt beyond comprehension,by everyone she trusted and held dear.
Of sadness because even though I was going to give her the world,I couldn't possibly take away all her pain.

And there I was,looking at her pale face and innocent eyes,feeling my heart break into pieces.

When I woke up a week ago and Dr. William announced to me that I'd been out for weeks. The first thing that stamped my mind was Sarah,and when I saw her,I felt my knees went cold and weak.

Her face looked pale and thin,there were dark circles around her bloodshot eyes,and she was fifteen pounds lighter than her already small figure,and her hair was a riotous mess.

My mother had explained to me how she'd tried and failed to get Sarah to eat,and the moment I set my eyes on her,I knew I had to get her back in shape.

It hurt me to see her hurt. It hurt me even more that I was the one behind her sadness.

Such an irony of life,She claimed I made her happy,when in comparison with the truth,I also made her sad.

I'd made mention of my mother,yes.

When I saw my family I was appalled,relieved and happy.

My parents apologized for past events,I also apologized for leaving them in the manner that I did.

I guess sometimes we don't appreciate what we have until life comes in the way and forces us to appreciate it,thats if we are fortunate,but If we are so unfortunate,then time will force us to appreciate what we had,and by that time,it'd be long gone.

I was also happy to see my beloved little sister Margaret. Her Husband,Pedro seemed like a very nice fellow.

Three days after I'd woken up,my parents and my sister set to leave for Australia.
Before they left,I had some alone time with my father.
"You know you've really got to take care of yourself this time?" He asked.

"I will." I answered.

He looked at me questioningly, "You good?"

I felt my eyes getting wet,so I shook my head and tried to pretend like something was in my eye.

"Ah yeah... I err.. Have something in my eye,I think." I said,As I tried to take off the imaginary eye invader.

My father towered over me,with a smug look of mock disbelief,He shook his head and walked closer,He sat beside me.
"I was born before you were,oh wait. Of course,I gave birth to you." He teased,and we both laughed. 

"Talk to me." He said.
He looked attentive,He'd always paid attention to very little details,I guess that was one thing we had in common,among others.

"Its just.....sometimes I feel like God is punishing me,you know?" I started. "I fell out with my parents,brought a son into this world and forced me to grow up in an already broken home. and now I have brought an innocent girl who's already broken,into my life when I know I have so little time,I'm gonna hurt her.... And it feels like thats the only legacy I am going to leave behind,that's all I'm good at,hurting people who love me." I stopped.