wake up, phil - [phan]

{ 35 } - Spare

Chris' POV

"Push, PJ!"

"I'm trying as hard as I can!"

"Shove it with your shoulder!"

"I've tried that already."

"Well do it again then!"

"But it really hurt my shoulder!"

"Don't be a pussy, Peej."

We were stuck. Out of all our excitement over Phil, I had manged to completely lose the flat keys for PJ and I when we were on our way back from the hospital. It wasn't entirely my fault, PJ should have been looking after the keys too.

I sigh dramatically as PJ pouts at me.

"We're stuck, PJ. What do we do now?"

"I don't know."

"I'm bloody hungry."

"Stop whining, Chris. It was your fault we lost the keys anyway."

"No it wasn-"

"Let's not argue. Not now. We need to find a way to get back in the flat."

We both sit in silence for a few minutes, contemplating our options. We only had one.

"Let's just try forcing the door open again."

So we tried. Our arms were smashed against the stubborn wood again and again, until we both stood back in defeat. Sweat plastered both our fringes to our foreheads.

"Come on," I groaned. "We've been here for an hour."

"Let's try pushing in the door together."
"Alright."

PJ and I both take a few steps back and prepare ourselves. I count to three, and at one, we both throw all of our weight against the door. And it works.

The door comes crashing down onto the floor of the flat, bringing PJ and I both with it. We hit the door and end up rolling around in a tangle or coats and limbs. Who knows what the neighbour's must have thought.

But the position we end up in makes my breath hitch.

I was practically lying on top of him, our noses inches away. Our bodies are pressed together tightly, because I'm not exactly light. I can feel his breath on my face, and it's pace quickens, like mine. His chest starts rising up and down rapidly, making me fall in time with his breaths.

"Uhh..." PJ awkwardly mutters as he turns his head. We're trying to avoid each other's gaze, but we don't move from our position. I half expected him to shove me off him, to laugh and pretend it was all a joke and "no homo" or whatever the fuck. But he didn't.

Oh crap, I think. What the hell have I got myself in for... Do I like PJ? Have I ever like him? Does he like me? Does he ever feel-

My brain immediately shuts down when I can feel him slowly getting closer. He's looking into my eyes now, his breath getting more intense on my face. I cannot avoid his piercing green gaze. He's getting nearer, he licks his lips. He's about to... Oh god, he's going to-

BRRIINNGG

We both jump out of our skin at the sound of the telephone. I scramble to my feet and rush towards the phone, hiding my face from PJ, only imagining how red it must be. I pick up the phone, not daring to turn around and make eye contact. My hands are shaking.

"Hello?"

"Christopher, is that you?" A female voice rattles through the phone.

It's Sarah. PJ comes up behind me, taps me on the shoulder and looks at me, puzzled. His hair is ruffled, eyes bright, cheeks flushed. He looks great.

It's Sarah, I mouth. And he nods.

"Oh Chris, we have to hurry, I'm so scared that Dan's... Oh god!"

"What? Sarah?" I watch PJ's expression as he suddenly frowns, obviously studying my face. I forget about the whole incident that happened moments ago. My mind is instantly turned on something else now.

"Sarah?? What's wrong? Has something-"

"Oh Chris, I'm so worried. It's Dan, I-"

Dan. Fuck, we had completely forgotten about him. We'd been so excited about Phil being alive and well, that Dan had been entirely pushed out of the picture. Guilt began to slowly sunk in, filling my stomach and head.

"Chris?"

"Sorry, I'm still here. What about Dan?"

"He left a note."

My stomach suddenly dropped, along with my jaw. PJ stared at me in worry, his eyes filled with anxiety as he slowly placed a sort hand firmly on my shoulder, calming me slightly.

"What did the note say?" I asked.
Sarah pauses, and I presume it is to retrieve the note from wherever she placed it. She clears her throat before speaking again.

"To Sarah, I have to write this quickly because I'm not meant to be in your office. I came to say thanks for everything you've done for me. It means a lot. Take care of Phil, whatever state he's in. Good luck with everything. And then he signs his name at the bottom."

I stay entirely silent, letting everything wash over me. PJ is still stock-still, nibbling his lip, his eyes studying my expression carefully because he has no idea what's happening.

"Why did he leave a note?"

"Exactly my point, Chris. His writing is funny. He's writing in a way that sounds like he's going away and not coming back."

Not coming back. The words hit me like a truck.

"What? Why?"

"Chris... You know how Dan felt during all these weeks of waiting for the person he loves to wake up. He gave up. Chris, we need to find Dan. Now."

He gave up.

"What do you mean, he gave up?" PJ's eyes widened further as he watched me.

"He thought Phil wasn't going to wake up again."

"But Phil has woken up!"

"Dan doesn't know yet. He left before Marcus and I woke Phil up. He still thinks Phil is asleep. And now he's gone. " I could hear Sarah's voice cracking with worry.

"Chris, we have to find Dan. He's done something stupid and we know it. I need you to help me. And PJ."

"Of course, Sarah. We'll be right there."

I put the phone down and I leave myself a few seconds to think and breath. But PJ pounces on me quickly.

"Chris? Who was that?"

"Sarah."

"What did she say?"

But I don't tell him any more than that. I simply grab his arm and pull him towards the front door.

"Chris, wha-"

"We have to go."

"Chris?? We can't leave the front door down-"

"We're going to have to."

"What's the rush?! We have loads of time-"

"No. We don't."

"Chri-"

"PJ, you need to trust me. We don't have time or lives to spare, which is why we need to go. Now."

And as I take his hand, we both sprint down the street. We're running, but I have no idea where we're going.

Not coming back. Because he gave up.