And So It Begins: NovaHD [BoyxBoy]

> May 2016 be better <

Hey guys. I personally have had a really bad year. 2015 has honestly been one of the worst years of my life and I'm not over exaggerating. I have never been so serious in  my life.

A lot of bad things have happened to me this year and its hurting me mentally.

At this point I'm hoping that for my own sake and the same for all of you, that 2016 will be better.

A lot if people have been complaining in the creature Fandom about thier content and so many people quiting or leaving the creatures. While I do somewhat agree that the content has gone down I do belive and still love the creatures. All of them. No matter what.

Becides that, a lot of other youtube bad things have been happening for me.

(Please hear me out on this. I promise that YouTube issues isn't the only shit I've been through this year. While Youtube is about 1/3 of my problems. I just need to get this stuff off my chest before the year ends. Feel free to stay or leave. I just feel like I will be supported here.)

I have been a fan of another group of people for the last two years. A lot of truth about the group has caused it to spilt and people took sides while others were kicked out. Only half of the people of that group were doing youtube becuase they wanted to make people happy. The other half used us for views and money. I felt so betrayed. I was betrayed to learn that we were being used, that some of then we're severe homophobics, rasists and many other things I wasn't expecting from the people I came to trust or go to if I felt sad. You know how badly that hurts?

Betrayal is a common theme of my problems of this year. I was left behind by my best friend who turned all my close friends against me, all becuase I didn't like her boyfriend. (This happened during the summer. I didn't like him becuase he was bad for her. He was rude, sexist, talked shit about me and her behind our backs...etc) I was ruined. It hurt so badly. I guess that was the first thing that really triggered my depression once again.

I've had more panic attacks and anxiety attacks this year then I've had in the past three years I've known that I had depression and anxiety.

My mother and step dad haven't been the nicest to me this year. Both have said really mean and nasty things which left me crying in my dark room alone.

There have been so many fights and loud arguments in my family this year. Its gotten really bad. My mother says I don't do anything for her but that's the biggest lie she has ever told me.

I've had a lot of friend/parent/YouTube/School issues this year. I miss my old friends.

I'm sorry guys. I just wanted to get this off my chest. I just really hope 2016 is a better year for me,  for all of us. If not, I don't know how much more heartbreak I can take before I breakdown.

Love you guys. Stay safe. Stay strong. Thanks for supporting me through this. See you soon.

~Syvannah