Journeys(L.H)

Chapter 51

"Thanks for driving me all the way out here. You really didn't have to, I know it's gonna be a pain to drive all night to your next city." I said as Ashton was walking me up my driveway and to the door of my house.
The whole car ride after our talks, we jammed out to lots and lots of music. I'm pretty sure we listened to every All Time Low song ever made.
"I enjoyed it. I usually don't get a lot of time to actually sit down and talk with the guys." Ashton said while shoving his finger into the pockets of his usual black skinny jeans.

I stopped walking and turned to face him. I slowly leaned in and wrapped my arms around his neck. "You're a great friend, Ash. I'm so lucky to have met you guys." I said in his ear as I stood on my tiptoes to reach his height.
"I'm kind of glad that all of this played out the way it did. This is the best possible outcome." He said with a happy sigh and releasing me.

I felt cold and like all the warmth had been sucked out of me by Ashton's body. "I guess I have to go now." I muttered sadly. "Tell Luke I'll miss him and that your band is really, really good." I let myself smile a bit and clasped my hands together before turning on my heel and walking up the sidewalk to my front door.

"Hey Brinley," Ashton stopped me before I could reach the door. I turned back, expectantly. "Don't worry about him too much. He'll be alright." Luke. He's talking about Luke. I have him a full smile and disappeared into my house.
Closing the door behind me, I rested a hand against my forehead. It felt warm. I went straight up into my bathroom and swallowed two pills with a big gulp of water.
Padding into my room, exhausted and drained, I stole a glance at my clock. The time read 11:32pm. Everyone was asleep. Louis was on their last tour before taking a long break.

Louis' "girlfriend", Briana, was pregnant with his child. When I first heard the news, I didn't talk to him for two whole months. I wasn't ready to be an aunt to whose mother I'd never met.
Everything had fallen apart since I left the tour and Luke. I lost everything.

Suddenly, by pure chance, a paper fluttered off my desk onto the ground in front of my feet. It was short story that I'd read in English class three years ago called "The Man Who Had No Eyes" by MacKinlay Kantor. It was about two men, who were both in a factory fire and had lost their eyesight. One man had become a very successful business man with lots of money and a good life. The other man was a beggar, roaming the streets and telling an untrue sob story to get money.
My teacher had told me that the difference between the two blind men was that the business man wasn't sorry for himself, whereas the beggar spent his life drowning in self-pity.

   I don't want to end up like the beggar. He felt sorry for himself. I'm not going to pity myself just because some boy didn't like me back. Boo hoo, go cry a river. It's time to build yourself back up and be strong.
I changed into shorts and a field hockey jersey from a camp that I did way before everything had happened. I slid under my fuzzy blankets and laid my head on the pillow. The darkness of the room was slightly comforting, yet daunting. I felt like I was being watched.
I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to think about anything else. The dreadful feeling didn't go away. Luke, my mind said. Think about Luke.
The way his hair swoops, how his lips felt against my head, the tightness and warmth of his arms around my waist. How good it would feel to be called his.

All of this helped calm me down. It soothes me and reassured me that whatever Luke was planning, was going to work and everything will be okay.
These events that took place tonight were hectic. I'd came in, thinking that this was a terrible idea and come out with confidence and ease.
I'm not going to lie, I do miss the tour bus life a bit. The closeness of being together felt like living with four brothers instead of sisters. It kept my on my toes, especially with Michael's prank wars. Louis often joined in on them and they turned into full scale attacks, one after another.
Michael had thought that it was a good idea to put shaving cream on Harry's pillow. So when Harry laid down, he got a fluffy surprise. We could hear him screaming all the way back at our bus, where we were nearly dying of laughter on the ground.

Sadly, I smiled and opened my eyes, only to be greeted by more darkness. It was times like these when my depression began really kicking in. It made me feel lonely, like I was the only person left on the planet.

And then I thought of Luke. And how he cares so much about everything that he says and does. And how he gets nervous around me.

And then I felt like Luke and I were the only ones left on the planet. And I was entirely okay with that.

A/N: cheesier than a 2000' Disney movie. Okay byeeeee🆘