Shaking Shoulders // Joshler

Fifteen

Tyler's POV

The days drifted by slowly. I've hit a lot of lows in life and I would have thought this would have been my lowest but I guess not. The nights after my dad passed didn't have the depressing effect they should have. Josh has helped me realize a lot. Realize that we are all born to die and realize I need to accept that. Hopefully someday I'd be able to explain how much Josh has helped me without even realizing it. Of course I cried a lot but that was good for me to get out I suppose. I stood shaking people's hands as they said 'sorry for your loss'. I didn't recognize half of them and it bothered me. Today my father would be buried and I would be going back to New York without Josh.

I'm surprised I have been handling this so well but I don't know what being apart from Josh would do to me. After the funeral I was to pack my bags while the rest of my family would watch my father be taken by a hole in the ground. I couldn't help but kiss Josh every chance I got while we got my things together. He continuously sighed with every article of clothing he brought to my bed. In the corner of the room he picked up my skeleton hoodie and smelt it.

"Can I keep this? It smells like you." His voice cracked and he looked at me with his sad expression. I walked over to him and cupped his cheek. "Of course you can baby." I kiss him and walk back to my bed. Three large duffle bags and a keyboard later my things are all in the van with my brother's stuff too. I looked at my mom climbing into the car before I looked behind me to Josh. Instantly tears formed and I ran over to him. He held me in his embrace and whispered in my ear "I love you." I cried harder and said it back through my tears. We were both crying into each other's arm for about ten minutes until my mom tapped my shoulder.

"Honey, I'm sorry but we have to go." She patted my back and walked back to the car. I reluctantly pulled away from Josh. "Text me please." He said. I smiled cause I knew I'd text him 24/7 and he wouldn't have to tell me to. "Don't forget about me."

"Of course not."

~~~~

The car ride was awful and I just wanted to go back to Josh. It's ironic how I didn't want to come here in the first place and now I dreaded leaving. It hurt to watch my boyfriend wave as my mom drove away from the house I once hated. My mom's keeping the house for when we come down to visit family and such which I'm thankful for. This means I can stay there when I come down for the summer.

The whole car ride home my mom continuously asked about Josh and if I made any friends. Once she mentioned friends Zack went on and on about all of our friends that Josh introduced us to. I put in my earbuds and looked down at my phone seeing I had a notification.

From; Jishiwa

I miss you already :(

I smiled at his text. Hopefully I can make it down to Ohio every time I have a school break.

To; Jishiwa

I miss you too lovey, we should skype tonight

I set my phone back on my lap and looked out the window. Will I really be able to spend so much time away from the person I love most?

~~~~~~~~

Later on we did skype and he was all smiley and giggly. His smile always made me smile even if he didn't say anything. We talked about school and how we missed each other so much. Eventually he fell asleep close to his laptop and I could see the light illuminate his adorable features.

We continued to skype and text like this every night until school started. The calls lessened because he was always busy with work. Yeah I still got emotional but I always stayed strong for him. I haven't hurt myself in the longest time. People at school still address me asking if I want to come to every weekends party. I always decline and the people I once considered friends haven't said anything to me unless they need something. They were never friends and I always knew that but it felt good to address them as something remotely close to friends along time ago.

I felt okay by myself; after all I always had Josh available on the phone and my brothers back home. I got back on the basketball team while managing to contribute to the choir. I would have never thought I'd enjoy the rest of my high school years but I did all because of Josh and my dad.

A/n: today's the anniversary of Tyler and Jenna and today is the day I cry because I want a relationship like that

May 8th, 2016; I'm so lazy but I need to fix these chapters ugh