Brusque Desperation

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The branch loses its leaves,

It awakens me.


I question,

for I am determined to know–

why trees lose their leaves,

but humans don't shed skin

after they're tired 

with how rotten 

and rancid it becomes.


I'm a lovesick fool that's roaming this world;

This stage,

It's the place I belong to–

I act to feel alive,

I bleed to breathe through my lungs.


I watched this life rain,

I watched my life go for a ride–

Needless to say, it never came back.


Thinking that I'd get far,

I thought wrong,

but I thought hard.


I reach out to calm my lungs

I grasp it, penetrate it with these desperate cries

it pants, struggles, and painfully heaves,

"Stop, stop!"


I couldn't help myself;

I question again,

Why can't we just renew our body like a tree?

Why can't we cleanse part of ourselves that make us feel disgusting?


I wanted to reach a higher place;

A place where it was possible to do that.


I was desperate

I was innocent,

but there was nothing that I could live on.


We're inside out, 

Humans,

We're endlessly searching for something that doesn't exist,

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