Cheater (Complete)

Chapter Twenty-One: Everyone Just Needs Somebody To Love

“Are you still taking your medicines?” I asked with concern. What else? I was still his wife, or at least I was until he signed the papers.

He didn't seem particularly inclined to put his signature on anything that would free me from this marriage though. He seemed very determined to keep me.

“Yes. It's a lesser dose though. Doctor says he would take me off them completely but I don't have anyone here if I get too... how I get” his words, though I didn't think he intended it, made me feel guilty.

Why was I feeling guilty?! He was a cheating ass!

“I see” walking to the fridge, I took out a beer and juice. I thought that I would really need a buzz if I was going to be dealing with a manipulative Sam so the beer was for me.

But, from the seductive look in his eyes, maybe drinking wasn't the best idea.

“Thanks” he said through a mouth full of sandwich. I nodded. Maybe I should hire a maid or something to help look after him. She might help him sign the damn papers too.

“How are you feeling?” I asked, studying him closely.

If he was doing as badly as I feared he was, with his condition, I might have to stay here again until I finish exploring the maid idea.

But leaving Dean again might just kill me this time around.

“Fine” his answer was curt. He didn't like sharing 'feelings' or feeling weak. He hated being so dependent on pills and incidentally, would only tolerate me babying him because of the baby we lost. I had a lot of mothering in me that I never got to use and I lavished Sam with attention and love, trying to make up for it.

It didn't really work.

“Tell me the truth” I ordered. He looked down at his half eaten sandwich, trying to avoid my gaze. He did that when he was either trying to avoid telling me anything and when he was getting ready to tell me the truth.

“It's been hell around here without you” he muttered, so low I could barely hear him.

The guilt reminded me that it was there with a sharp pain that felt like a punch.

“And?” I prompted.

“And I've been drinking a lot more. I don't know how to cook worth a damn so I've been eating take out” he said, eyes still stuck to his plate.

I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. I hated when he ate take out. That stuff was so unhealthy for him, especially with his medical problems.

Unbidden, a hint of mothering rose up in me and I walked to him, putting my arms securely around him.

“It's all going to be okay” I soothed, “But you have to stop eating junk. You know how bad it is for you”

He nodded and sighed, meeting my eyes for the first time. His blue eyes were so wounded, I had to remind myself who was in the wrong in our marriage.

“How am I gonna eat then? I still can't cook” he mumbled. I was thinking the same thing.

“How about we hire a cook? Or a maid?” I asked. That would be easiest. Maybe I could look one up right now.

Sam looked at me weirdly.

“Absolutely not. I can't stand to have strange people in our house, you know that” he said, still looking at me like I was crazy.

“Once you get used to them, they won't be considered strange anymore. That way, everyone is happy. I was thinking of hiring a maid anyway cause you don't know how to clean after yourself” I said. It was true, Sam was a complete slob. Looking around the pristine house, I wondered if he'd even been living here.