Cheater (Complete)

Chapter Fifty-Seven: Beginning of the End

Rosie's POV

It was finally over. Ricky was never going to smell fresh, free air ever again. He'd see the light of day from behind the bars that contained him. I was free of his taint in my life.

But now the question remained; what now?

I left Sam. He was a cheater. Wasn't ever going to change. Sure, he fed my need to take care of someone but ultimately, could I ever really handle him? It wasn't as if I were exactly healthy myself. Mentally, I just wasn't ready to take care of Sam. So he went looking for comfort somewhere else and in another way. Banging blondes that actually used to look like his mother. I had to accept that he wasn't the child I longed for. He was an adult. Who broke my heart.

Dean was simply the love of my life. My old life. After this whole ordeal, how would we even fit together anymore? It wasn't as if he was left unscathed by Ricky. He was dealt a horrible blow and he couldn't really look me in the eye the same way anymore. While I loved him, I was also deeply ambivalent. How could I know he would support and help me if some other situation popped up? When I really needed it? I was never going to stop trying to do the best I could for my clients. Hell, now that I was unemployed, I could truly work for the population I wanted. Trauma victims. Victims that wanted the justice I finally got a taste of.

If Dean couldn't handle me trying to tackle the ugliness of the world... I wasn't sure I could stick with him. With Dean forcing the firm to fire me, I had my answer. He didn't want me exposed to the ugliness of the world. He didn't want me to be touched by that scum of any more than I already have. But I wasn't a fragile princess. I could finally handle myself and make myself useful to other people who were in the same boat I once was. The thing is... I wasn't sure Dean saw me as the woman I was. Maybe all he saw was the girl he used to live with all those years ago who hid from her own shadow. But I wasn't her anymore. I wasn't perfect but by God, I knew I was better than I was. Dean wasn't giving me any credit for that.

Honestly, everything was just ugly for me. I didn't know how to feel about anything anymore. It was all so muddled in my mind.

I had to do what was best for me. I needed to just start fresh. Find a new home. A new practice and not even think about love until I knew I was good and ready to jump back in that pool. It was too messy as I was.

Yeah. Maybe a fresh start is what the doctor ordered.

Dean was certainly not going to like it.

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Okay, this is the start of the ending I've been promising for a while. My mind is pretty scattered so I'm going to upload this in bursts. Is it what's best? Of course not. It's disruptive and ugly. But I don't want you to keep waiting for a longer chapter, since I'm sure this is going to be fairly long and getting it all done in one piece will take a while. So I hope you're okay with the bursts. Leave your thoughts on this in the comments.

But hey. At least I'm finally working on the ending. Yay?

I hope you like this little monologue from our Rose.