My Guilty Pleasure

10. New beginning

I opened my eyes and the pain immediately went through my body. What's going on? I blinked quickly several times wanting awkwardness to get away from my body. When I finally started to recognize things around myself, I found myself face to face with a worried Gabriel. A little frown creates itself on my face because of the pain. Again I closed my eyes waiting for the moment for the pain to pass away. I can hear the whispers in the room but I don't recognize what are they talking about. But it seems that there is someone else in the room except Gabriel. What is happening? The only thing I know is that I came home and Damien... I froze remembering the scene in my mind. I can't believe I went so far with Damien! I can't believe that I let myself fall to him again, I let him control me, I showed him all my fears and allowed him to be my master. Again, I was helpless and I could 't even push him off me. I hate that! I hate it! I hate that I always turn out helpless. Again he hurt me, and again because of him, I have experienced all the awful things that already happened to me in my life. I clenched my fists now totally forgetting the pain. I tried to get out of bed but I've just noticed that the needle is attached to my arm. With furious movement, I tore it and get out of bed. That move shook me but I ignore it all except the anger that I feel. I gotta get out of here! I must go anywhere, I can't stand this place. I can't stand the memories and the pain. I just want to rest. To turn off my mind and go far away. Just far away from everything. I felt a hand on me and I pushed away whoever it was. I can still hear people calling my name but I don't pay attention to them, I just kept walking toward the front door.

- Desiree, please wait! Desiree, wait for me! Please wait! - Now I recognized Gabrel's panic voice but I can't be with him right now. At this point, his presence won't help. I need to be alone to think carefully about everything. Maybe I just need some time to chill out and be left alone. I can go to New York or Los Angeles. Anywhere! At this point, someone grabbed me around my waist and I screamed, trying to free myself from the grip but I'm still weak.

- Desiree calm down. Shh... It's me. Calm down for a moment. No one's gonna hurt you, calm down. Calm Desiree, breathe. Take it easy. Count my heartbeat... -  Only now I noticed that it's Zachary that's chasing me. He put my hand on his chest and I felt his strong heartbeats. I started to count the beats and after a while, I calmed down. I raised my head and looked at Zachary. He smiled sympathetically and gently hugged me. At this point, it was just what I needed the most. His move didn't scare me but he gave me some needed comfort. For a second I felt like someone's looking out for me. I felt safe and I didn't want to move away from him. I wrapped my arms around his waist and hid my head in his neck. Zachary just hugged me tightly and started to stroked my hair, comforting me. I closed my eyes and stopped thinking about anything. I was just listening to his heartbeat and let my mind wander into the void. Slowly, I began to feel tired and I felt sleep starting to take me.

- I calmed her down. Leave her alone for now. Don't make the crowd, she is finally calm. Go back to the room and I'll take care of her. Now! - Zachary is whisper yelling and I smiled a little listening to his commanding tone. I heard Gabriel and William commenting something but a second later I heard the door closing. And now here are just me and Zachary in this big hall.

- Do you want me to take you back to your room? - Zachary asked me raising my head with his hand. I looked into his eyes and saw the concern and worry on his face. I didn't expect him to be the one who cares so much for me. Somehow I don't look at him as at the other men. Maybe at first but not now... I can't even imagine that he could use me or hurt me in some way. I smiled at him and shook my head.

- Can we go out? Behind the house is a garden. I would love to go there. - I said quietly and Zachary stroked my cheek.

- Of course. I'm going to take you in my arms now, okay? – Zachary asked and I nodded, so he gently took me in his arms. For a moment I caught my breath but quickly relaxed. In addition, I feel too tired to fight. And everything hurts, I have a cut on most parts of my body. Luckily Zachary's gently holding me, otherwise, all of this would be too painful. I looked at my body and saw that I wear only a thin summer dress and that my whole legs and arms are covered in cuts, some are a little deeper and I see that they are sewn and some are more lenient. Oh my God! Zachary noticed my glance and pull me a little bit closer to him.