I Am Your Wrath I Am Your Guilt I am Your Lust

Chapter 15

Zack's POV

"Where are you going?" I asked Meaghan as she stood in the bathroom applying a shit ton of make up.

"Out." She replied.

"Out?" I snapped back.

"Yes Zack." She whined. "Out for lunch then we're going for a facial."

I frowned. "With who?"

"Val and the other's." She told me, looking at me with her big dumb cow eye's in the mirror.

When the fuck did she start hanging out with Val?

"Oh so you just thought you'd fuck off for the day?" I snapped at her, looking at her, loathing her.

"Well you went out Zack." She snapped back.

"Are you fucking serious?" I yelled. "I went out once, over a fucking week ago, and you've gone out everyday since, so what it's some sort of payback?"

She frowned. "Don't act like a child." She mumbled. "I'm not paying you back."

"Yeah actually." I snapped turning and walking out. "You're acting like the dumb child I always thought you were, you are paying me back."

I walked down the hall, into my office and shut the door. I wanted to slam it, but I didn't want to wake the baby.

I was so fucking mad. One night, one night I'd gone out and she was never going to let me forget it. I wished I'd never come home that night, I wished I'd stayed at Samantha's.

Samantha, I hadn't thought about her, well for at least ten minutes. She was all I'd thought about since that Friday night, she was just a great girl and I cursed myself for not getting her number. She was in my head and try as I might, I couldn't stop thinking about her. I was ashamed to admit, I'd even driven past her house a few times and I considered stopping, but what would I say anyway? I was married and there wasn't a damn thing I could do about it.

I snatched up my phone, calling Matt.

"Yep." He answered, sounding almost as pissed off as me.

"What are you up to?" I asked him, trying to sound casual.

"Taking the kids out for lunch." He explained. "Because imagine that their mother isn't here."

I bit my lip. Of course she wasn't. "Feel like company?" I asked him, because I sure as shit didn't feel like sitting around this prison.

"Yeah please do." Matt said, his voice sounding lighter. "You bringing Junior?"

"What." I said sarcastically. "You don't actually think his mother's going to look after him do you?"

"Yeah dumb question." He chuckled. "Anyway, I'll see you soon."

We organised a time and place to meet and then I hung up, heading in for a quick shower.

I was going to speak to Matt about another night out. Fuck the girls, we needed to make it a regular thing. Maybe the other's guys would join us, although they were actually married to nice girls, not self obsessed bitches like Matt and I. Maybe we'd even see Samantha and Aubrey again and that thought put a smile on my face.

God I was horrible, I thought as I got dressed, thinking of another woman, but I couldn't help it, there was just some kind of attraction there.

"I'm going." Meaghan announced, walking in and looking at me.

"See ya." I said turning away from her. The thought of kissing her repulsed me right at this moment.

"Fine." She snapped walking out.

I went in and woke Junior up, changing him and getting him ready, before heading to the car and putting him in his seat.

As I drove out the driveway I sighed, it felt like a load had been lifted from my chest. Just being away from that house felt so good.

I drove downtown and found a park, getting out the pram, grabbing the bag and putting Junior in, before walking to the restaurant.

I walked in and smiled. Matt and the two boys were here, sitting at a table, waiting.

"Hey." I said walking over and getting organised. "How are you?"

Matt pulled a face at me. "I've been fucking better."

I nodded. "I know what you mean."

He shook his head. "Bitch." I heard him mutter under his breath.

"So I was thinking of having another night out this weekend." I said to him, picking up the menu. "You and me, and anyone else who wants to come."

"I like that idea." He said smiling widely.

"Yeah, so how is the leg?" I asked him, trying not to grin.

"Still fucking sore." He said smiling. "Can you believe that? Hey maybe if we go out we might see, well you now who." And he had a twinkle in his eye.

"No, who do you mean?" I asked him, attempting to look serious and glancing around the restaurant.

I looked around at the other people in the restaurant and then I glanced at the front counter, frowning.

Two girls were standing there, obviously waiting to be seated. They had on sunglasses but they looked familiar, very familiar.

I watched as Aubrey took off her sunglasses and said something to Samantha, making her smile. My stomach did a little somersault at the sight of that smile.

I quickly looked back at Matt. He was sitting there frowning at the menu, completely unaware.

"Hey." I hissed at him and he looked up from the menu. "Look around and tell me what you see."

He frowned. "What are you on about you idiot." He snapped, going back to his menu.

I reached over, grabbing the menu off of him. "Just look." I hissed.

He rolled his eye's at me, but turned his head, looking around. "You're an idiot." He muttered, but I knew the moment he saw them because he made a noise in the back of his throat.

"So do you see?" I asked him softly, inconspicuously looking at the girls.

He looked at me, raising his eyebrow's. "It's them."

I nodded. "It certainly is."

"Should we say hi or something." He muttered and I noticed he kept glancing at Aubrey.

I shrugged. "I don't know."

I watched as Matt glanced down at himself and my guess was he was seeing if he looked okay. "Well I don't either." He muttered.

I glanced over at them again and that was the moment Samantha chose to look up. Her eye's met mine and before I even had the chance to smile, she looked away quickly.

I frowned, watching her. She was talking to Aubrey, looking at her menu and pretending I didn't exist. Maybe she doesn't remember me?

"Did she ignore you?" Matt asked, frowning at me.

I nodded. "It would appear so."

And I watched as he looked dead straight at Aubrey, trying to catch her eye.

"Fuck this." He muttered standing up.

"What are you doing?" I asked him, glancing back at Samantha.

"I'm going to say hi." He told me, leaning over and whispering. "I've done nothing but think about that night Zack. I thought I'd never see Aubrey again, but here she is, I'm not letting her go without at least saying hi."

I nodded in agreement, I mean I felt the same way.

I watched as he approached and I felt a sinking feeling in my chest. Matt and I were both married, I mean what could we really do with Samantha and Aubrey anyway.

That thought made me feel sick and it wasn't the thought of cheating on my wife that made me feel sick. It was thought of not seeing Samantha again. That thought made me feel very sick.