We Are Free

Taking A Big Step

The next morning at 6:00 my alarm goes off. I get up and go to Emily's room I wake her up. She gets out of bed and uses the potty I lay her clothes on her bed. I feel like crying she is just getting so big.
     She gets dressed and I make her some fruit and toast for breakfast. I eat while she eats. Then I get dressed while she gets her socks on and brushes her hair I go into the bathroom and put her hair into a French braid pony tail the two sides where french braided and it ended in a pony tail.
     We get are shoes on it was 6:30 I grab her back pack and her lunch I put it in her back pack. I get Andrew up. They hug and Andrew goes inside while I wait at the bus stop with her. It was at the end of my drive way. I see the bus and give her a hug.
"You have a good day. When I pick you up from Anna's I want you to tell me all about your day I love you so much sweetie."
"I love you to Jace have a good day at work."
"Thank you sweetie." She gets on the bus and sits down in a seat she waves at me with a huge smile on her face as the bus driver drives away. I try not to cry but I do it anyway.
     I watch the bus go down the road. I wipe tears from my eyes as I walk back to the house. Im excited and happy for her. Im just sad because she is so big and it's hard to believe she is in school now. I look up at the sky and see the sun coming up.
"Don't worry mom we are all going to make you proud." I finish wiping my face and go inside I get Andrew's shoes on and grab my lunch and the back pack. I put Andrew in the car. I get in and leave the drive way.
     Usally about this time Emily is telling me to turn on the radio. I look back to her seat and I don't see her smiling at me and giggling. I don't know what Andrew is going to do without her.
     I start crying again because she is my best friend she is always there for me when I need her and she always makes my day a little brighter and now she's not there. I know it seems as though I'm over reacting but I have raised her since she was 1 year old.
     My mom was always working hard to support me and Emily then she got pregnant with Andrew. After Emily was born my mom needed help my dad was none. He was always at work to keep a roof on our head and when he was home he just yelled.
I guess it started going down hill from there.I never thought of how hard it would be to see her going to school.
     We have a special bond. It was really hard to watch her get on that bus and drive away even though I know I will see her after work and she will tell me all about school. It just means that she is getting bigger and I don't want her to I can't imagine how I will act when she turns 10 or 13.
     When she starts playing sports or when she turns 16 and learns how to drive or when she goes to prom or brings home her first date. I get to Anna's and drop Andrew off. I get to work.
*Lunch*
Zac and Halo come up to me.
"How was it this morning?" Zac asks me.
"Yeah." Halo asks nudging my shoulder.
"I cried like a baby." I say.
"Awwwwww how sweet." Halo says.
"No it wasn't not for me. It was hard watching her get on that bus and leave. It was hard to only drop Andrew off and not hear her tell me to turn the radio on or listen to her sing the whole way there.
It was hard not to look back and see her smiling at me it was hard to wake up and watch her get dressed and put on her shoes and grab her back pack. Not to leave to go to Anna's but to get on a school bus." I have started crying again. Halo hugs me and so does Zac.
      "It will be okay." Zac says.
      "I know but this week will be hard for me." I say nodding my head.
     "I bet she is making tons of friends and is telling everyone what an awesome brother she has." Halo says.
      "You think so?" I ask her.
      "I know so." She says as she rubs my shoulder.
      "I don't know what Andrew is going to do." I say.
      "I'm sure he will figure it out." She says, he is with Anna. I smile and hug her I get up and go to the bathroom I clean myself up and pack up my lunch. I put it away and go back to work. It was 2:30 I go into Dans office.
     "Hi Jace." He greets me as I walk into his office.
      "Hi I have a question for you."
      "Sure."
     "It was Emily's first day of school today and I was wondering if maybe I could go pick her up just today?"
     "When does she get out?"
     "3."
     "That's alright with me."
     "Thank you so much."
    "Your welcome." I leave his office and call Anna I tell her that I'm going to pick her up from school. I get my things and leave. I get in the car and go to the school.
     I get there just a little after 3:00. I go into the school and walk to her classroom. I walk in the classroom and she was sitting on the rug playing with some building blocks. She sees me and runs up to me she hugs me.
    "Hi Jace!" She says a huge smile on her face.
     "Hi princess do you want me to take your back pack?" I ask her.
     "Yeah." She grabs it.
     "Okay." She hands me her back pack I take it and her teacher walks up to me. Emily had her teddy bear in her arms.
      "Hi Jace!" She says and I smile.
      "Hi."
      "I like to meet with the guardians and parents of the children after the first day."
      "Okay."
      "She did wonderful. Even though today in class I had asked each student to draw a picture of their family and she drew you herself her youger brother Halo and Zac then up in the clouds she drew your mom. When they came up to tell the class about what they drew she told us that you support her and your little brother.
That you have your friends and that you and your mom where in the accident and she died. She also had her teddy bear and had told us that her mom had got it for her and that it never left her side."
      "Yeah it means alot to her." I say. Emily grabs my hand.
      "But that is not my only thing."  I start to get worried did she do something. "Today at recess a boy had took her teddy bear and wouldn't give it back. He teased her and pushed her down calling her an orphan. He told her she was stupid that her mom was dead and she didn't care about her at all. Emily was in tears I handled the situation but as a teacher there isn't much I can do but send him to the principle."
      "Okay could I talk to this boys parents?"
      "Yeah your more than welcome to they are actually over there." She points to the direction they are in.
      "Okay thank you."
      "Yep." I put Emily's back pack over my shoulder and we walk to the boys parents.
      "Hi I'm Jace." I say to them.
      "Hi Jace." His mom says.
      "Hi young man what can we do for you?" The boys dad asks.
      "I was just informed that your son has bullied my little sister. You see my dad is an alchoholic and use to abuse me. My mom had died nearly 2 years ago in a car accident.  I am her care taker as well as I'm the care taker of my 3 year old brother.
     I work at the auto body shop. I fix cars to support us and when my sister had shared this information about us when asksed about her family, at recess your son had taken her teddy bear that really means a lot to her. I can't take it long enough to wash it and had bullied her because of her living situation.
      She is cared for tramenduaslly but he had pushed her and said that she is an orphan and are mom never cared about her."
      "Oh my gosh I am so sorry you see he has anger issuses and has issues understanding that she is different." The boys mom says.
      "I completely understand that one of my oldest friends dad got in a car accident and had hit is head so after that he had issues controlling his anger, so I understand that and that's okay. I just don't see that as a good reason or any reason at all to bully my sister or any other child."
      "We don't either we never expected for him to do this." His mom says.
      "He has never bullied another child but we will bring this to his attention most definitely. I agree with you it gives him no reason to bully your sister or any other child." His father says. The boy was behind his father. Emily was kinda hiding to holding on to her teddy bear.
      "Son I want you to apologize to this little girl right now you are in big trouble." His dad scolds him.
      "I'm sorry Emily." He says his voice kinda trembling.
      "I accept your apology." Emily says.
      "I have to say though you really are such an insperation if you don't mind me asking how old are you?" His mom asks me.
      "I'm 16."
      "Really your serious?"
      "Yes ma'am I am."
       "Well you keep doing what your doing because you are truly amazing."
      "Thank you."
      "It was a pleasure meeting you Jace and I have to say you handle this very maturely. If my son bothers your sister any more don't hesitate to bring it to myself or my wife's attention and we surely will take care of it." He says shaking my hand.
      "Thank you very much." I shake his hand back and I put Emily on my shoulders and leave. I put her in the car and she buckles up. I get in and buckle up on the way to Anna's she tells me about coloring and crafts and story time nap time and organizing her desk.
      "Are you going to pick me up tomorrow?" She asks me a huge smile on her face.
      "No just today Dan let me."
      "I like Dan he is so nice."
      "Yes he is."
      "So Anna is getting me tomorrow."
      "Yup and Wednesday Halo and I have off because she has to go to a doctor appointment quite a while away and we will come get you."
      "Yay!" I smile and we go to Anna's I pick up Andrew and put him in the car. Anna said he did fine he slept until 10:00 and ate breakfast then she took him to the park and the water park and then he ate lunch took a nap and had a snack then he colored then that's when I showed up. I pack the back pack and leave the house.
     I go home give Emily a bath and she gets her pjs on. She picks out her outfit for school. I make dinner and do some chores. We eat dinner and I do the dishes I start making a list of thing we need to get food and household things. This Friday we have to go shopping. I get them in bed at 7:00 and I take a shower.
     I do some laundry and go to bed. Tuesday I pick Emily up from Anna's and she tells me all about school. I'm so happy for her. She had lots of fun just like yesterday and never seemed to run out of things to say. I go home and add more things to my list and cook dinner I do house chores and go to bed.
    Wednesday when Emily gets on the bus I go back inside and go back to sleep until 8 I get up get dressed and get Andrew dressed. I pack the back pack and we eat breakfast.
     "Ace where is Emily?" He asks me as he spoons some eggs into his mouth.
      "She is at school."
      "Why?"
      "Because when you turn 5 or 6 you go to school until you are 18."
      "When do I get to go to school?"
      "When you turn 5 or 6 so in 2 or 3 years. Unless you go to preschool."
       "I miss Emily when she is gone."
      "Yeah."
      "Yeah it's hard waiting for her."
      "I know its hard for me to."
      "Really?"
      "Yeah."
     "How hard?"
    "That's hard to say because both of you mean alot to me. I hate seeing you guys grow up."
     "Why?"
     "It just means your growing up. I hate to see you do that because then it's your bringing friends home, learning how to drive, bringing home dates, going to prom then you get married, and have babies and leave me here all alone."
      "But what about when you have babies?"
      "They will do the same thing." He walks over to me and hugs me.
      "I won't leave you."
      "You sure?"
      "Yeah." I smile and put are dishes in the sink then we leave the house I put him in his car seat I put the back pack in Emily's car seat and his shoes in the middle. I give him a cup with a lid and straw on it. I hand him the blanket he got for his birthday. It was going to be a long drive I go to Halo's and go inside for a minute.
      "Hi Jace."
      "Hi Anna."
      "She is in her room she said something about getting dressed. I would make sure she is covered first but she is ready."
     "Okay." I go upstairs and nock on her door.
      "Yeah." She says.
      "Are you dressed?" I ask.
     "Yeah you can come in." I open the door and she was at her mirror in her bathroom. The door was open. She was braiding the sides of her hair.
      "I have Andrew in the car when your ready."
      "Okay I won't be much longer." She grabs a hair tie and ties her hair into a pony tail. She sprays some perfume on her shirt and jean jacket she was wearing some baby blue and gray high tops with some jean short shorts a t-shirt that had a faded American flag that was facing down like it was hanging on a wall. She had on a jean jacket that went half way down her arms to the bend of her arm.
     She shuts the light off and walks to her bed. She grabs her phone off the charger and her wallet. She puts her wallet in her pocket and pulls on her pony tail.
      "Okay I'm ready." She says.
      "Sounds good." We walk down stairs her nails were painted purple and there was sparkles on it she had white lines going at an angle on all her nails.
     "Well we are leaving." She tells her mom.
      "Okay honey call me and tell me how it goes." She says and Halo nods.
      "Will do." We leave and she gets in the car.
      "Hi." Andrew says waving at her.
      "Hi sweetie I see you like that blanket I got you." She says.
      "Yeah."
      "I can't take it from him." Say rolling my eyes.
      "Well I'm gald he likes it." She says.
      "So are you going for and all American girl theme today?"
      "I don't know I did my nails last night what for I don't know. This morning I got my happy ass out of bed at 7 ate some food and thought well jeans sound good today. I went  upstaris went in my dresser grabbed these shorts and this shirt.
    I went to my closet and saw the jacket and thought what the hell. I took a shower and my mom texted me and I told her I was getting dressed. I got dressed put on a little bit of make up and started doing my hair when you showed up so."
      "See your mom said you where getting dressed. She failed to tell me how long ago that was why I knocked. I didn't wanna walk in and you be half naked."
     "Oh yeah I wouldn't want that either that's illegal."  We start laughing at that.
     "Almost your missing a few steps in there."
      "I know I was being a pain."
     "I know."
     "How was Emily's first day I never really herd anything about it?" I tell her about the kid and the picture and talking to the kids parents.
      "Really?"
      "Yeah little kids can be so mean and I went up to his parents I handled it maturely. I told them what had happend and that I support them and what their son had done. I mean he has anger problems and has issues comprehending things and I get that. I understand it totally but that gives him no reason to bully Emily or any kid for that fact." I say.
      "Oh yeah I agree with you she is still having the hardest time adjusting to it and it has been like 2 years now."
     "Yeah well she lost her female role model. So now she lives with me and Andrew and Andrew don't want barbies and dress up. He wants transformers and ninja turtles and you are her female role model. That's why she loves you so much you come over and play dress up and barbies and dolls and do her make up."
      "Yeah I enjoy doing that with her it's fun."
      "Yeah that's why when we went to the fair she wanted to do everything with you. You are her friend I mean you show her alot a since your a girl you don't mind getting girly with her and she looks up to that."
      "Oh yeah I understand what you are saying completely and that's why she takes what happened so hardly. She can't control it she couldn't control what happend no one could.
     The person that killed her he was drunk he knew better than to drive to get in a car and drive and he did and now he's in jail. An amazing person isn't here to watch her kids grow up she isn't here to watch Emily get on that school bus or go to her first dance. Make that first shot or goal in a sport.
     Bring home a date go to prom learn to drive and much much more. The same applies to you and Andrew because there is a lot you can accomplish yet. When you find a girl get married have kids and they do the same."
     "Yeah and it's not fair it's not okay I wish she would have broken a bone or heck even being paralized from the waist down would have been good. I know that sounds selfish but it's alot better then what happened.
     She could be there for all those big steps if she would have broken a bone or gotten paralized."
     "Yeah your right 100% right."
      "She was such a good person all around and all she got was shit. In the end of it all she would give you her last dollar to get some food. She would give you the shirt of her back so you have something to wear and all she got in return was hell."
      "Yup and it's not fair but there is nothing anyone could do about it."
      "I know that." I say.
     "My question is, when she wants to shave her legs, are you going to do it with her?" We start laughing.
      "I am not cruel. I will show her and then I will wear pants for a week." We laugh again. "You could do it to." I say, she nods her head in agreement but we will cross that bridge when we come to it.
      "So since Emily's issue how has it gone?" She asks.
      "Well the boy isn't bothering her anymore."
     "That's good."
     "Yeah." She looks in the back.
    "Awwwwww he is sleeping he looks so cute."
     "Well he does look like me." She starts laughing a little bit.
     "You look cute when you sleep to."
     "Well thank you I just started shaving I will have you know." She laughs again.
      "You're cute." She says
      "I know I try.
     "No you don't."
      "Yeah I don't." She grabs her phone to answer a text now is my shot and my plams start sweating. I hear Zac in my head say just go for it.
     "Ummm...H-Halo."
     "Yeah." She looks up at me and my stomach start doing flips and gets tied into nots.
     "Ummm...Friday I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go to the creek with me? Then spend the night at my house? Zac said he would take the kids."
      "You want me to go out with you to the creek kinda like a date. Then you want me to spend the night."
     "Umm y-y-yeah." She goes silent for a bit and and squeezes her lips together. I feel like throwing up until I get an answer.
      "Um...Yeah I will go out with you but let's not do anything illegal if you get my drift." We start laughing in reality we don't really care. It's a joke that has gone around in are group of friends since middle school.
      "Yeah I get it and I'm not interested in that now nor am I ready for that."
     "Good me either."
We laugh a little once more and I stop at a stop light and wipe my hands on my pants. I'm so relieved she said yes. My stomach settles and I just continue driving.
     "Should I wear my swim suit?" She asks me.
     "Oh yeah."
     "Okay sounds good."
     "Come by around 6:30."
     "Okay."
     "I will have food I can't guarantee it will be healthy."
      "That's fine." I keep driving we finally get to her appointment at 11:30 Andrew and I stay in the waiting room. She comes out at 12:00.
     "So?" I ask her with Andrew in my arms on my lap.
     "It was good."
     "That's good."
     "Yeah lets go with that."
     "You just said it was good."
     "Yeah the results where, how I got them wasn't."
     "I don't wanna know."
     "Good cuse I didn't want to tell you."
We leave and go get lunch at a restaurant. While we wait for are food Halo and I talk.
      "I have something to tell you."
      "What's that your not pregnant are you?"
      "No why would I be pregnant? I have to do something first and why would I see a doctor and hour away to find out when Walgreens is just down the road."
      "I was being a smart ass."
      "I was playing along."
      "So what do you have to tell me?" I ask taking a drink of my water then handing Andrew my phone. He has already colored his place mat and the place is so packed it is taking a while for the food to come.
     "Well you know how I said I have a crush and I wanna focus on him?" She asks. Her voice is kinda shaking.
     "Yeah."
     "Well he happens to be sitting right in front of me." I smile and so does she.
      "Your serious?"
      "Yeah I'm serious that's why I said yes to a date you like me too to ask me on a date."
     "Yeah I like you a lot I have ever since we met."
      "Really?"
      "Yeah when Emily and I were building her doll house. Shs said that we were going to date then we are going to get married then we are going to have a girl."
      "Seriously!"
      "Yeah I couldn't believe it."
      "She may be right."
      "Maybe." We eat lunch and leave we drive home and go to the school when 3 comes we go in there together and Halo takes Andrew on her hip we go inside.
      "Halo."
      "Hi honey how was school?"
      "Awesome hi Jace."
     "Hi." I take Andrew and Halo hugs Emily. I take her back pack and we leave I call Zac and tell him about me and Halo and he says he will take the kids like before.
    I drop Halo off at home and go home myself Emily colors a page the teacher gave for homework. I make dinner I'm so thrilled that Halo said yes and what had happened today. I keep playing it over in my mind but I don't have her just yet I'm really close though.