Yours (Louis Tomlinson)

16

Phoebe's POV

Sleep means nothing to me right now. I can't believe what just happened. Very few things make sense right now. I'm only sure of a few things. One is that he cheated with me. Two is that he's a dick and should die in the burning gates of hell. Three is that I feel like total shit. Four is that I'm the other woman. Five is that I ruined a marriage. And then there's six. Six is the worst. I cared about a person so much and fell in such a short amount of time that I ruined it. If I had just gathered the facts, maybe I wouldn't be in this mess. Like the time he said he loved me, he thought he was leaving her. Or the fact that every time he cancelled on me, it was the same excuse about work. I never saw him in scrubs once. What is wrong with me?

"Phoebe?" I hear Rebecca's voice on the other side of my door.

"I can't help you if you don't let me in. Please don't beat yourself up." She says. I stay silent and close my eyes. A few tears squeeze out and I held my body with my arms to try and slow down the shaking.

"Goodnight." Rebecca says and I hear her footsteps leaving me.

*

There's a repetitive knocking at my door and I groan. I didn't sleep well last night. I kept replaying my list, feeling more and more miserable. It's Sunday today, so no work. Thank god. My only question was why was Rebecca waking me up?

"Phoebe?" She asks.

"I'll be out in a minute." I say and sit up.

"Louis came to see you." She says.

"Great." I say sarcastically.

"I heard that." He says and I roll my eyes. I crawl out of my warm bed and stare at it. What if I just lay here for all time? Is that okay?

"Phoebe, please come out." Rebecca says and I sigh. I shuffle over to the door and open it.

"Oh babe." She says and hugs me. My lip begins to do that stupid quiver again and I bite it. I hug her tightly and then look up at Louis.

"Don't feel like shit, okay? I'm sure he's punching himself in the face right now because of how dumb he is." He says.

"Dumb for lying to me, dumb for thinking he could pull it off, or dumb for cheating on his fiancé?" I ask.

"Dumb for lying to you, that is." He says and I nod.

"Well this sucks." Rebecca says and I roll my eyes.

"You can both do something. I don't know why you made me get out of bed." I say and she shakes her head.

"Because it's two in the afternoon and you look like death." She says.

"I feel like it." I mumble and turn to go back to my room. She grabs my arm.

"Hey! Now, we're getting you ice cream and wine and movies and anything you want." She says and I look skeptically at Louis.

"I just came to check in, not have a sleepover." He says and I can't help but crack a small grin.

"You're free to go." I say and hear how hoarse my voice is. He quickly scurries out of my flat and Rebecca laughs.

"Well, that got rid of him!" She says and I roll my eyes. That must be my new thing, eye rolling.

"Now, I'm going to the store. Write a list of anything you need." She says.

"I'm not hungry." I say and go sit on the couch.

"Really?" She sounds intrigued and I shift uncomfortably.

"Yeah..." I say.

"Who was the one who teased Louis for losing his appetite because of his failed relationship?" She asks and I roll my eyes.

"Not the same thing. He's been that way for a year. My boyfriend cheated on me and I found out he's engaged! I have much more reason to fast." I say and she shrugs.

"Alright. So, no food?" She asks.

"I'm not hungry. I feel empty inside from throwing up. I know I should be hungry, but I'm not." I say and she nods.

"You have to eat sometime." She says.

"I can't believe I was so blind." I say.

"Well, I didn't really like the guy-"

"Why didn't you tell me that?" I cut her off.

"Because you were happy." She says.

"I'm not happy anymore." I point out.

"Would you have listened to me?" She asks.

"No." I whisper.

"Exactly. You don't listen to anyone, but yourself." She says and sits next to me.

"Shut up." I snap and lay my head on the back of the couch.

"I'm not going to shut up! You have to learn your lesson." She says and I sigh.

"I think I've been through enough without getting lectured." I say.

"You aren't the first person to be cheated on." She says.

"You're right, but I am considered to be the other woman! You should have seen the way she looked at me! And Dylan! He looked at me like I was such a slut!" I say and she sighs.

"I understand, but there will be better people." She says.

"Like who? Boys aren't lining up on the street to pick me up!" I say and she nods.

"True, but the right guy won't be in some line or some guy you meet at a club. Well, maybe he will be, but the point is that you can meet someone anywhere! Don't let some arse stop you!" She says and I look out the window.

"You were with the guy for two months, Phoebe. It's not the end of the world. I think you can dust yourself off." She says.

"I'm done talking about it." I say and close my eyes. I need a minute to be by myself.

"Phoebe stop shutting me out." She says.

"You know I do this!" I yell and she jumps.

"Yeah and I hate it. I should be the one person you talk about everything with, yet you shut me out and hide so much from me?!" She asks, yelling at me.

"It's nothing. I always tell you it's nothing, okay? Just stop talking for five minutes, so I can think about what I want to do with myself." I say.

"Christ Phoebe I wonder about you sometimes." She says and I shake my head.

"I need some coffee." I whine and she looks over at me.

"Fine. I'll go get you the usual." She says and I smile at her.

"Thank you." I tell her and she nods.

"That's what friends are for." She says and gets her coat on. She leaves me after that.

"A real pissant." I hear her say on the other side of the door and I roll my eyes. Great. Louis is out there. I'm not sure how I felt about that guy. One half of me knew what a huge dick he is. The other half saw him as a friend. I didn't know what he was to me.