I Don't Deserve Your Love

Chapter 12

Saturday morning dawned. This week seemed to drag on forever. Ryan was still not talking to me. Well he did talk to me but hardly. It was so awkward between us so neither of us tried to start a conversation between eachother.  I undertsood he needed some time. I know I would hate to see another girl's lips against Ryans.

But I need him to know, I DID NOT kiss Brandon. I just have to wait. But fuck...I ain't patient. I have cricket today and I don't know how that will play out because he is one of the opening batsmen with me. Which means we will be first batters on our team to play. I swear Brandon oragnised this on purpose but he's the coach. Back to the point, I couldn't even bear to look Ryan in the eye without seeing his pain and anger in his eyes. I had truly broken him. I had to talk to him. But when?

I ponder in silence as I start making my own breakfast. I missed Vi's Saturday morning breakfasts.

Of course, today. I would speak to him today. Definitely. After the cricket game, I would speak to him. I had to fix this. I had to apologise for all of this and.....

I had to explain to Ryan. EVERYTHING.....He needed to know the truth. If he thought I was crazy for my fear....screw him.  I drank my cold coffee nervously. I was nervous for the match and telling Ryan. I hurriedly finish eating my toast and start washing the plates.

I ignored the now nervous feelings in my stomach and rushed upstairs to get changed. I pulled on my cricket gear and made my way down to school.

As I walk through the car park, I see Brandon coming out of his car. Fuck fuck fuck. I think. Of all people I had to see him.

"Cas" He waves eagerly at me.

"Hey..."I say awkwardly. Whyy???I  groan inwardly.

"Look. Can we talk?" Branodn asks sighing as if sensing I wasn't comfortable speaking to him.

"Yeah sure." I say.

"Can we please put what happened earlier this week behind us? I don't want thing to be awkward for us. " I see Ryan driving into the car park. Shit no.

"Okay, I'm good with that." I say quickly not giving a second thought. "I'm just going to go say hi to Flynn." I see my fellow team mate and rush up to him saying hello. Brandon stares at me with a blank face as I walk away.

......

Here we go. I am walking on to the field  with Ryan about to start batting. This week we were versing Northcross Highschool. The boys on the team were all broad shouldered and tall. The school was similar to Chilton, but this team was friendly.

I take my place in front of the wickets and the innings begin. I whack the first ball in between two fielders. I run to other wicket as the ball flies towards the boundries. But one of the boys manage to dive and stop the ball from reaching it.

Ryan takes posistion with the bat held ready and whacks it right behind him. The ball whisks through the air and flies high over the boundary. A six!!!!

We continue the game and he continues to play well. By the time I am out we had reached a whooping score of 77.  Flynn walked past me grinning at our score and I walk off tired yet pleased at our work.

There is a short break then we are to begin bowling. I am bowling up first and I aim for the stumps. I bowl striaght for it. OUT!!!! The teams cheer excitedly and surround me as the next batsmen comes on. I continue to play for another over then I am put off.

This team was good, I thought as another balll flew over the boundary. That was the 5th six in the last two overs ( A/N: For people who hate cricket, I'm sorry. I am obssessed with it. HINT:There are six balls in one over. So two overs is 12 balls). They had to get 12 more runs to win. They had 7 more balls. It was very possible at the rate they were batting. If we could just get the boy who was hitting these sixes out, we would be fine. The other batsmen had only just come on but this batsmen had been on for ages. We had to get him out.