I Don't Deserve Your Love

Chapter 38

I hear faint whispering outside the door. "Wait it was Ryan?!" Drake questions confused. "Ryan stabbed Vi. What?!! No. He can't have." 

"No, we both saw him with the knife afterwards." Madeline sniffles. 

"But, this is Ryan. He wouldn't have done this." Drake says fiercely, he seemed determined to not believe it.

"Well he did." Madeline seems to be crying.

"Hey, let's go downstairs and I'll make you some coffee. You've had a sleepless night." I hear Laila's familiar voice whisper along with the sound of footsteps walking away.

"You can't seriously believe Ryan had anything to do with this." Drake says.

"Drake, he pulled the knife out. There was no one else around." Emily harshly replies.

"Come on. This is one of our best friends since childhood. And for god's sake he loves Cas. He would never do this." I frown at his words, Ryan couldn't have loved me. 

"Look, we shouldn't be thinking about this right now. What we need to do is help Cas. She needs us right now." Emily says and I hear the door knob turning.

I pull the covers over my head as the door opens. "Cas." Emily whispers.

A pair of hands pull the covers down. "Hey. We heard what happened." Emily says, her eyes were slightly red and tearful. I stare at Emily silently before Emily pulls me into a hug. "I'm so sorry Cassie." Drake soon comes and join in the hug.

They pull away as they notice me not responding. I notice Emily looking at the ground, where the promise ring was. I sit staring ahead at the blank wall. I didn't have anything to say. 

"Look, we're all here for you okay. " Drake says softly. I nod, I didn't want anyone here. I just wanted to be alone.

"Just call us if you need us." Emily says as she opens the bedroom door again, Drake follows her and the door shuts again.

I resume my position lying in bed close my eyes trying to fall asleep. Sleep was one way to escape from the pain right now.

*One Week later*

It had been one week. One week since Vi had been stabbed, one week since I lost my last family member. One week since, the boy I loved took everything away from me. 

I could only blame myself for Vi's death right now. If I had just been there with her, I could have done anything. But all I did was watch her die in my hands. 

I was still at Ry...Madeline's house. I hadn't moved from the bedroom, except to go to the bathroom. I've barely moved from my place under the covers. I just lay on my side, curled up, facing the curtained window.  

I hadn't eaten much either, I seemed to just be sick to the stomach as I threw it up. My eyes were just managing to stay open, I had had sleepless nights. I kept getting nightmares, the best way to avoid them was to just stay awake. 

Madeline had tried to get me out of the room, Emily, Laila, Drake had visited but no conversation was even made. Brandon had made frequent visits everyday, but I talked to no one. I was just trying to cope by shutting everyone else out. My stomach grumbled yet again and my tongue felt parched. I reached out with my frail hand to grab a glass of water. I sipped it slowly before putting it back down and rolling over to my back. My clothes were sticking to me, the last shower I had was a week ago. 

I hear the familiar knock on the door, it must be morning. I had barely realised. I let the door open and instead of hearing Madeline's soft voice, I hear Brandon's.