Marie's Path

Chapter 9

"Ugh!" Marie woke up hitting the bed in frustration. She felt like she hadn't slept at all. Sunlight hit her face as she stared at the ceiling. Throwing off the blankets, she rolled out of bed cursing, "I'm so sick of this! Why can't I sleep!"

She staggered to the closet grabbing clothes. Once in the bathroom, she studied her face in the mirror. It was the third night she had been jarred awake for no reason.

She touched the dark circles under her eyes. " Oh god I wish I would stop waking up every couple hours. What the hell is wrong with me?"

Stripping off her night clothes she pulled back the shower curtain, stepping into the tub. She adjusted the shower temperature to as hot as she could stand it. Marie closed her eyes, letting the water slam on her head and cascade down her back. 

The voices started almost immediately, North's voice rang out in her head, 'your sicko mother almost killed her,'  'she's your sister!' You're a real piece of work, Marie.' North's voice changed into her mother's, 'evil girl!' 'Marie! See what you caused!' That's what happens to little girls who try to be pretty,' Did you want him to touch you?' 'It's Sangs fault, she wanted this to happen,' The voices went on and on.

Marie slid down onto the floor of the tub, she rocked back and forth cradling her head in her hands. "Stop it!" she wailed, "No! Shut up! It's not our fault!" Years of pent up anger poured out of her. Screaming, she beat her hands against the tiled wall. When the water turned cold, she was spent. Breathing heavily, she turned the water off and wrapped a towel around her.

She walked to the mirror and stared at her reflection. Her eyes were red and puffy, her skin blotchy. She grimaced as she looked at herself. Closing her eyes and bracing her arms against the counter she took deep breaths trying to get herself under control. "Not our fault, it's not our fault," she hissed.

As she looked into the mirror again, her eyes narrowed. "Her day is coming. Both of them. I'll see to it."

As she rummaged in the bathroom cabinets looking for eyes drops, she made plans. She'd been away from her mother long enough that her eyes were starting to open. Having listened in on conversations between other girls at school, she knew her homelife was definitely not even close to normal. How could she have been so blind? How could she not know how abnormal their homelife was? Sang was a victim of physical abuse and neglect, it chilled Marie to realise she had to be a victim too.

It was hard to wrap her mind around it all when she had been programed to believe a certain way. At least her sister was free, and with the help of those boys she was a survivor. Marie decided, if she could keep herself determined, and not fall into her mother's traps, somehow, even if she is doing this alone, she could be a survivor too.

She put on some concealer to hide the dark circles under her eyes before lightly adding some foundation. After getting dressed and fixing her hair, she studied herself again. "Good enough," she thought turning away from the mirror.

Marie sat on the front steps leaning against the handrail. The sky was a vibrant blue, the sun's rays felt good against her skin. The neighborhood was so quiet and peaceful. She was relaxed, but so tired. She didn't want to let herself doze off in case that kept her awake when she went to bed that night. She was trying to think of an excuse to go see Sang, but so far everything she thought of seemed stupid.

"Hey." She lazily turned her head to the sound of Derrick's voice. She watched him walk up the sidewalk and scooted over giving him room to sit on the step beside her.

"Hey yourself." She smiled at him. She had wondered if he'd show up today. After her shower melt down she had kinda forgotten about last night. She had no regrets for what she did and hoped Danielle was reminded of the punch every time she opened her big mouth.