Marie's Path

Chapter 35

The sun cast a warm glow over the interior of the bus. Marie could almost imagine she was sitting on the leather seats of a travel bus, going to parts unknown. But the feel of the cheap vinyl seats and the noxious fumes from the city bus took that image right out of her mind.

Getting on a random city bus might not have been the best idea. It was a spur of the moment decision. She had been walking past the bus stop just as one was pulling in. Thinking she needed distance for awhile, she got on without a second thought.

As the bus lumbered along, Marie watched out the window as the neighborhoods changed. She didn't know where to get off, only that she wanted to go someplace quiet, just to take stock of her life. Everything was happening so fast. With all these changes it was hard to keep up. Now that her money was gone, it was like she was back at square one. She didn't want to have to be dependent on others, it made her feel like a loser, an ugly loser that would never get ahead in life.

Her mother certainly hammered that into her head for as long as she could remember. She could hear her mother's voice screeching in her her head when she was little, 'You're an ugly evil girl Marie! Tempting your own father with your whoring ways. A whore! A future whore!' Her slaps came then. 'That's all you'll ever be! If you ever leave this house, you'll be on your back in no time. Laying on your back taking money from men.That's where you're headed!'

Marie knew, even at that young age that her mother was wrong. She remembered when she was little, telling herself that someday she'd show her mother that she was wrong. Then she'd say she was sorry and be proud of her. It wasn't her fault her dad made her do those things. And besides, if she didn't do what he wanted, he might have come after Sang.

But the damage was done. Living the way they did all their lives her self worth had been shattered. She grew up day after day feeling nothing but anger. Her will was almost broken...almost.

At the time, in her young mind, her little sister had super powers. She had watched Sang. After every punishment their mother dished out. Sang became stronger. She saw it in Sangs eyes. She accepted her punishments and bounced right back. Marie started copying Sang.

Now, looking back she knew that even though Sang was shy and timid. Broken in a lot of ways, it was Sang's tremendous inner strength that kept her going. Her will was never completely broken. That's what Marie learned from Sang, the strength to keep her will from being broken. The only difference was that Sang could let her anger go, Marie let it grow.

The bus jolted over a pothole. Marie rubbed her temples with her fingertips, she felt mentally and emotionally exhausted.

She wondered what the guys were thinking right now. She was surprised they had let her go so easily. Maybe Raven stopped them knowing she needed space. That thought only lasted a minute. Rolling her eyes she felt the pocket of her shorts. Her phone was tucked safely inside right next to a few dollar bills. Of course they'd let her go, they could track her. They'd always know exactly where she was.

It was a compromise of sorts, she reasoned, one that she wasn't going to make an issue over. If being able to track her will reassure them she's safe, then she was going to let it slide. But knowing that they could know where she was and maybe be nearby, still didn't mean she could be careless. And getting on a city bus not knowing where it's going, knowing nothing about the neighborhoods it stops at, was careless.

Marie took a quick glance at the people around her. Nobody seemed to pay any attention to her. Everyone was in their own worlds. Some scowled, seeming to grow impatient when the traffic got congested. Others clutched packages close looking straight ahead, anxious for their stop.