Crash ~Justin Bieber~

Chapter 85 ~ The Walrus And The Carpenter, Part 2

(Rachel's POV)

Deep in the woods, we set down our saw. We had chosen a group of pine trees that were halfway up the slope. They were small enough to carry, but tall enough to match Justin's height. In our eyes, they were perfect.

"This one looks good," Justin said, circling around a dark and graying pine tree.

"No Justin," I dismissed him, "You can't cut that one down"

"Why not?"

"Because I named it. Her name is Fredricka Morisson,"

"Rachel, I told you not to bond with the pine trees!"

"I couldn't help it," I said, "She looks like someone I know, and that Fredrika, was a really, really nice person,"

Justin sighed. He walked forwards and found another pine tree, choosing to stop there instead "What about this one?" he asked, "Can I kill this one then?"

'Oh no," I shook my head, "I've bonded with that on too. Her name is Poncho. Poncho Morgan Hope"

"Good god Rachel - you are so never naming our kids!!"

"Poncho is a good name!"

"Yeah - For a jumper!!"

"Just don't hurt her Justin!!!"

He sighed frustrated. "Fine. I wont hurt her. But can you please choose a tree? We don't have time for this'

"Okay," I answered back. Then I scanned the woods.

"Well....not Joyce.... and definitely not Margaret or Wanda-Jane...."

"Yeah," Justin agreed, "Definitely not them..."

"Oh! I know! You can chop down this one!" I pointed, "I named her Monet, because she scratched me when I walked past her, and she just looks kind of naturally evil"

Justin looked over at the tree, "Cool. Let's go for her throat,"

I stood by the tree as Justin knelt to the base. He started sawing. I knew that these kinds of things always looked way easier on TV, but Justin was still hopeless at it. The tree barely budged.

"Zig zag it," I said.

"Rachel, that's not how you cut it,"

"Yes it is. You Zig zag the saw back and forth!"

"That doesn't make it cut any faster,"

"Zig!!!!!! No - no Zag!!!!!! Zig!!!!!!!!!! Zag it Justin!!!!!"

"Rachel,"

"Zig!!!!!! Justin, you zagged when you should have zigged!!!"

"Oh my god, shut up!"

But I couldn't help it. I had to keep talking. Justin was doing it all wrong.

"Zig it!!! No, Zag it!!!!! Hurry up, you're not killing Monet!!!!!"

"You know what Rache," Justin dropped the saw and stood up angrily, "Why don't you do it?!!"

"Fine," I shoved him, "I will!"

I took the saw. I knelt to the base and placed the saw on the wood.

Okay, so it was a lot harder then it looked, and with Justin yelling 'Zig-zag!!!' constantly in my ear, I kind of felt like shooting him.

"This is stupid!!" I yelled, "We can't do this fifty times!!!"

"No," he said, "We can't... and we shouldn't have to. Wait here for a second. I've got an idea..."