Lost In The Moment

Four

I spent every waking moment for the next two weeks with Charlie, taking him shopping, going out to eat, watching movies.

The Monday of the third week I had packed and was ready to go back on tour.
"Do you have to leave?" Charlie whined as I tossed my last bag in the back of my jeep.
"This is what I do," I said, squatting down and looking up at him, "just like dad goes to work everyday, this is my work."
"Why do you have to leave for so long?" He asked and I sighed, pulling him into a tight hug.
"Because dad and I don't do the same thing for work," I said and he nodded, sniffing a little.
He pulled away and wiped his nose. I sighed and wiped his cheeks with my thumbs.
"I'll be back," I said and he nodded, "I promise ok? March 12th, 11:30 in the morning Ill be right here," I said, pointing to the ground, and he nodded again.
"You promise?" He asked and I pulled him back into my arms.
"I promise," I said and he nodded, stepping back.
"Have a good time," Margaret said as I stood up and looked at her. She hugged me quickly before letting me hug Jason.
"You too," I replied, kissing Margaret's cheek.
I got in the jeep and pulled out, waving as I drove away.

After an hour in traffic I made it to the airport, meeting up with the everyone else, Mike, Jen, Jonny, and Brian.

Four hour flight, two hour layover, and another five hour flight later we arrived at our destination.
London, England.

"So who're we on tour with anyway?" I asked and Jen shrugged.
"Didn't think to ask, I just assumed it'd just be us."
"Mike?" I asked and he looked at me, "do you know?"
"Nope," he said simply and I sighed, adjusting my bag on my shoulder.
"Kelsey!" Someone called and I looked around before spotting him.
"Who's that hottie?" Jen asked and I smiled, shoving her playfully.
"Nate," was all I said in reply and she nodded.
"Ok well 'Nate' can stay away because no one's good enough for my Kels," she said and I smiled, putting arm around her shoulders and pulling her close.
"Hey Nate!" I called back and he gave me that gorgeous half smile.
"On second thoughts..." Jen whispered as Nate walked over and she could get a better look at him. I blushed a little and rolled my eyes.
"Can I take this?" He asked when he got to us, touching the strap of my duffel bag. I nodded and passed it to him, massaging my shoulder after.
"Introduce us," Jen whispered, pinching my exposed hip, and I yelped a little getting a weird look from Nate.
"Nate this is Jen, Jen Nate," I said and she smiled, holding out her hand. After they shook hands Jen started talking to me about Jason, her significant other, apparently forgetting the Nate was there.
"And I mean he's an a.ma.zing lover but come on, get a job! You know?" She asked and I nodded slightly to show I was listening.
"Where're we going?" Nate asked suddenly and I pointed to the big black bus that had 'Journeys End' in big blue letters. He nodded as Jen picked up the pace, seeing the bus.
"I'm sorry for her," I said and he chuckled.
"Don't worry about it," he replied and I smiled briefly, blushing slightly, before sighing and looking straight ahead.
This isn't love
There is no such thing as love
You just like him
He's a good guy
That's all
That. Is. All.
I kept running that through my head until he broke the silence,
"So, where'd you live?" He asked and I glanced at him, caught off guard by that jawline.
"Chicago," I answered, quickly looking back at the bus that didn't seem to be getting any closer. Out of the corner of my eye I saw him open his mouth to say something but he closed it when my phone rang. I swore under my breath and pulled out my phone, smiling when I saw Margaret's name.
"Sorry I have to take this," I said and he nodded.
"Not a problem," he replied and I smiled again, answering the phone.
"Hello?"
"Someone missed you," Margaret said and I chuckled a little.
"Auntie?" I heard Charlie's little voice ask through the phone.
"Hey bug! How're you?" I asked and I  saw Nate smile.
"I miss you," Charlie whined and I smiled, switching ears and adjusting my bag.
"I miss you too but I'll be home soon," I said and he sighed deeply making me smile and stifle a laugh.
"It's been forever and I miss you," he whined and I stopped, covering my mouth with my hand in an attempt to not laugh. Nate stopped as well and looked at me, an amused look on his face.
"I miss you too bug," I said quickly and I heard him sigh again. "So much sass," I whispered to Nate and he smiled.
"Can you do something for me bug?" I asked and I could hear him getting excited, "go into the kitchen and beside the fridge is a calendar, you see it?" I asked and I heard him huffing.
"Yep!" He said, clearly satisfied with himself, and I chuckled a little.
"Ok now get mom to go to March, can you do that?" I asked and I heard him yell for Margaret.
"Yep!" He said again.
"See the circled day?" I asked and heard him breathe heavily, obviously getting on his stool.
"Yep!" He said once more and I smiled again.
"Ok now what I want you to do is cross one day off everyday until you get to that day, can you do that for me?" I asked
"One a day?" He asked and I nodded
"That's right," I answered.
"Ok!" He said and I smiled.
"When you get to that day I'll be home," I said and he huffed again, getting off the stool.
"Yay!" He cheered.
"Now, I gotta go," I said and he stopped cheering.
"When're you going to be back?" He asked and I sighed, bending over and flipping my hair back as I stood back up.
"Good night bug," I said and he sighed.
"Good night auntie," he said before hanging up.
I put my phone in my pocket and chuckled.
"Who's that?" Nate asked as we started walking again and I smiled.
"My cousin," I said and he nodded.
We didn't talk about anything until we got to the bus. I showed Nate around, put my bags on my bed and went back downstairs.
"Hey, you wanna grab something to eat?" Nate asked and I smiled politely.
"Ok! We're heading to the venue!" Randy called before I could answer.
"When we get there," he chuckled and I smiled again.
"I'm not really hungry, sorry," I said and he nodded.
"That's fine," he said and we sat down on the couch.
The entire way to the venue we played a finish-the-sentence game until it got too silly and we had to stop.
"Ok, ok," I said, sitting up and calming down, and he looked at me, still laughing. "A serious one," I said and he nodded, his smile gone in an instant.
"Hit me," he said and I took a deep breath.
"Before I die I want to?" I asked
"Have a family," he said, answering before I'd even finished the question. I nodded, keeping those thoughts running constant circles in my mind.
See? He wants a family
You don't
It's not love.
"Kelsey?" Nate asked and I looked up at him, realizing that I'd zoned out.
"Sorry," I said, chuckling nervously, and he smiled softly.
"Not a problem, did you hear what I asked?" He asked and I closed my eyes and shook my head.
"I'm sorry," I said again and he chuckled, putting his hand on my knee.
"Favourite song is?" He asked again and I sighed, adjusting my legs and he moved his hand.
"Oh so many," I laughed and he nodded, laughing as well.
"Top five?" He asked and I thought for a bit.
"In no specific order," I started and he nodded, "Wild Child by Juliet Simms, Welcome to the Black Parade by MCR, Fall Back In by Plumb, Homecoming King by Andy Black, aannd... Mother by Ian Grey," I said and he nodded thoughtfully making me laugh.
"Interesting," he said and I laughed a little more.
"Ok! Listen up Journeys End!" Randy shouted and I turned, my back to Nate, and Nate grabbed my waist and pulled me onto his lap. "We're at the venue, you guys have half an hour for sound check before the meet and greet. After that you're warming up and are on right after NF. Any questions?" Randy asked and I looked around, my eyes landing on Jen who had her hand up.
"Jen?" Randy sighed and she smiled sweetly.
"When do we get ready?" She asked and Randy checked his clipboard.
"After sound check and before the meet and greet," he said and Jen rolled her eyes.
"That's ridiculous! I can't get changed that fast!" Jen exclaimed and Randy shrugged.
"Get used to it, that's the type of tour this is gonna be!" Randy said loudly, getting everyone's attention again.
"I have a question," Nate said and Randy looked over, surprised because I usually don't say anything during the briefing. I glanced up at him before looking back to Jen who's eyebrows were raised and she had a smirk on her face.
"Yes?" Randy asked and Nate slowly dragged his finger in patters up my arm.
"Would it be a big deal if Kelsey helped me with a few of my songs?" He asked and I looked up at him. Nate kept his gaze firmly fixed on Randy.
"I-I don't see why not," Randy said and Nate's hand stopped and squeezed my arm gently.
We got off the bus and filled into the venue through a side door. Nate gently tugged me along behind him, our fingers loosely interlaced.
His hand warmed all the way up my arm.
I loved the way he made me feel.
Like he genuinely cared.
Like even though he had his own problems he still cared to listen to mine.
Stop now Kels
You know this cannot end well
Stay away from him
Keep your hands off him and his hands off you
No matter how hard I tried I couldn't get myself to pull my hand from his.

"What're we doing boss?" Jen asked and I smiled.
"Outsiders," I said and she smiled and nodded as Mike started.