Immaculate Misconception

Open the door

I sighed as I held them in my hand. all the little white circular tablets that could easily end it all and I could be happy again. away from this world. and in a better place.

"Cassie, Food's ready!" I heard Chris call out from down the stairs. I didn't respond. Silence. Soon, I heard foot steps coming upstairs. panic set in. what if I wasn't quick enough? what is Ricky finds out and just decides I'm not worth it and just never bothers to do anything involving me ever again? not that he would have to. better off without me.. all of these guys are.

I heard music start playing in my head, and heard my own quiet sobs along with a few voices outside my bedroom door.  

I took a pen and paper off the counter and scribbled down a note for Ricky and the others before music was playing in my head. 

Hear the knock, knock, knock when she cries
We're all alone tonight
Hold your breath when a black bird flies
Count to seventeen and close your eyes
I'll keep you safe inside 

one...two........three.

I heard the door bust open right as I was putting all the pills into my mouth and I felt arms wrap around me, all of them spilling over on the floor.

Ricky's POV

"She's not answering." Chris returned and I looked up from setting out some food and I sighed "Did you guys see where she went?" I asked, slightly panicked "upstairs." Chris responded, his voice in monotone, as if not caring. I didn't have the time to address how much he cared or not. but I did care, and that's all that mattered to me right now. 

I ran upstairs to her room, hearing quiet sobs in her room. barely audible. "Cassie? Cassie open the door." I said and tried opening it myself. locked.

I saw Balz and Ghost had come up too. "Cassie, please open the door." Balz pretty much begged. no response.

I knocked on the door a few times and Ghost sighed "i got it." He said and he stepped aside and he rammed the door open, breaking the lock, but, to be honest, that was the least of our worries.

I sighed as we didn't see her in her room. "the bathroom." Ghost said and we didn't even try to open it. Balz  kicked open the door and we saw her crouched on the floor with something in her hand...pills.

"Cassie." Balz sighed as he wrapped her up in his arms and the pills spilled all over the floor.
Her quiet cries broke out into sobs and screaming of how she wanted to die and she didn't want  us to help her. she tried breaking out of Balz's arms, but he had a tight grip on her hands and he just sat there, Ghost gathering up all the scattered pills and went downstairs to dispose of them.

after a few minutes or so, we got her calmed down and back to a generally normal state of mind. "so, you wanna talk to us about it?" I asked and she shook her head, looking down at her hands in her lap, and twitched her fingers around. "I just wanna be alone." I heard her mumble and sniffle a bit. I looked up at Balz and he nodded a little bit, and I got up, "okay." I said and Balz picked her up and carried her back into her room as I dug through every cabinet, corner and drawer, and took away anything that she could use to harm herself at all.

I gathered everything into a ziplock bag, and saw her quietly talking to Balz inside. I sighed before walking in and Balz nodded to her and kissed her forehead.

I smiled to her "you're gonna be okay?" I asked, and she nodded, and I sighed "We'll be checking on you." I assured her and the side of her lip curled up a small bit in an almost unidentifiable smirk. I kissed her forehead before handing her her phone and she smiled and I wiped some stray tears off her cheeks. I nodded, and she nodded once in return.

me and Balz walked out  "We'll let you know when we're gonna leave for Scranton." Balz told her before we left and she nodded and instantly got onto her phone.

I smiled and closed her door. "I see you have the confiscation bag." He commented and as we were heading downstairs, we ran into Ghost, who was heading upstairs "mind if I talk to her?" He asked and I nodded and we stepped aside, letting him go up. "did she tell you anything?" I asked Balz and hesitantly nodded as we went into the office, that nobody ever really used for anything.

"What'd she say?" I asked and he sighed "well.. Alex apparently lied to her about pretty much everything. she told me she wasn't ready to talk about all of it yet." He said and I sighed "I'll talk to her when we get to Scranton. I'm gonna go eat." "I'll bring her food." Balz said and we both made our way into the kitchen, me leaving the ziplock bag on a bookshelf in the office.

I sighed as I sat at a barstool in the kitchen and began munching away at my food. I know that one day this will just be some faded memory but for now it hurts me to see Cassie in the pain she's in.