The Struggles in Life

changing for you

I feel like i'm fat,

I lost five pounds in three months,

That's good right?

Oh wait,

Now i'm too skinny?

Just let me gain a few pounds,

Still not good enough for you?

I tried changing my clothes,

My likes and dislikes,

I tried changing myself to fit in,

I gave up,

And your still attacking me with the same old threats i'm no longer phased by,

You hurt me and tore me down,

You though out temptations to lead me don the same path,

I try not to follow the evil but I do,

Once i'm in there grasp they hand me the razor,

The knife,

They want to to give them more blood than I have,

They want me to cut deeper,

My thoughts are killing me,

People say it's will be alright,

But then why have I been suffering for seven years,

But then you gave me amazing people,

You got me thinking there is good in life,

But once I reached a happy point you stole them from me,

I started isolating myself,

Then you set me him,

I started talk to him,

But i'm scared what evil game are you playing this time?

I don't know if I should continue speaking,

I understand life is full of hurt,

But I've been feeling hurt to much,

Tell me about God,

Then destroy the beautiful thought in front of me,

I have other secrets no one will know,

Scars on one will see,

Cries no one will here,

Because all of the hurt and bad things you've done to me are now stuck in my mind,

So new scars will keep appearing,

But you wouldn't notice,

you wouldn't care,

I mean who would want a depressed suicidal girl,

Who could love me and my flaws?

My scars?

My mistakes?

I guess nobody because I can't even love myself,