Memories of You

Chapter 39 - My Drug

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This chapter is dedicated for everyone who has been bullied mentally or physically. Each of you are a beautiful human being and remember, no one is perfect. Just be the way you are. X

P.S Love you guys a lot x

Recap ;

I'm hurt. It hurts me to see him like that. Because I know, I care for Ed. He's the one who makes me stand up again when I was falling. At that time, I know. Christian is my drug. But Edward.. he's my vitamins. I care for him as my person. The one I can always go back to even though I messed up million times. Because Edward is my person.

"Ah.. I guess I already knew about it since the first time you met Christian. There's just this spark, right there that everyone can see. And I'm jealous of the sparks. Even though we are going to be engaged, I don't think we have that sparks." Ed says while fixing his hair and there, I see tears at his eyes. He's trying not to let the tears get out.

"Let's just be each other drugs at another life, Ana. You've got Christian for this life, but let's hope I will be your drugs at another life." Ed says while smiling. There, I can see his tears in his eyes. And at that time, I silently praying. Let's hope Edward can be my drug at another life.

Chapter 49 - My drug

After all the talks I had with Edward, we decided to put it in the past and just having fun and act like everything's okay. We had a nice breakfast and also had a nice walk at the park. It was awkward but it is good. We finally had our quality time after all the drama that have been going through.

Now, I'm sitting while thinking about the way I'll tell Christian about my decision. What will I say? "Hey Christian guess what? I choose you over Edward." Of course not. What if.. Christian's just playing with me? What if he just thought he missed me because he wasn't the one who end it? What will I do then? 'Running back to Edward?' My subconscious says. Of course I can't. That will be too egoistic & childish. Edward is not your second chance you stupid girl! He deserves better, you said it yourself!

Ah nevermind. Why am I talking to myself? And, I've decided that I'll go meet Christian now. I'll tell him about my feelings. Taking my car keys, I walk towards the lift. I'm going to meet him.

Arriving at The Royals, the most luxurious hotel in London where Christian obviously stays makes my knees turn jelly. I feel like dying. I'm so nervous right now. I can't even think clearly. What will I say? What should I do now? Taking my phone, I have decided to text Christian. Because I don't know his hotel room and I'll be needing it to meet him.

"Um.. What's your room number?" I texted him. Soon, he replies back.
"The 75th floor." he replied.
"Why?" He texted me again.

Deciding to just ignore the message , I walked towards the elevator. Soon, I walked out from the elevator and seeing him standing in the door. Waiting for me with confusion all over his face. It makes me remember the old times. It feels like when we were in Escala, when he used to wait for me.

"Hey" I say while smiling a little. I hope he can't see my stress though. And lets hope he doesn't know that I'm trembling inside.

"Hi.. you shocked me by coming here so sudden." He says, while fixing his hair. And with this shocked smile in his face, oh, how adorable he looks.

"Sorry for shocking you. I decided to clear up something. But are you busy though? I mean if you're busy I can just come back later." I ask while looking around in case I see another submissive waiting for him. I don't want her waiting right? My subconscious says. But he said he haven't have any sub since you left! My other self said. But.. is it true?

"What will be so important for me to let you come back home after coming here, my Ana?" He says with this crooked smile and taking me back to reality.

I'm trembling. God, what if I faint because of too much handsomeness? And too much adorableness? Wait, is it even a word? My subconscious says again.

"Ana? Are you okay?" Christian snaps his finger in front of my face. Oops. Talking to my self again. Real great Ana.

"Of course! Why wouldn't I? Haha" I say while putting some of my hair behind my ear.

"So.. as much as I love seeing you at my place, what are you doing here? I know you're not the type to come to someone else's place just to say hi. Especially not mine." He says while start walking to the sofa and having this look that basically says "I'm angry but I'm also sad"

Following him, I start thinking about the right words to say. What should I say? That I've made the decision just a day after it made?
"Um.. it's just um... I'vemademydecision." I say real quick, hoping that he won't hear that.

"What? Made what? Can you speak slower, Ana?" He says while now looking at me with this serious look.

"I've made my decision. You know, the choosing between-" Before I had the chance to finish it, he already cut it.

"I remember perfectly what the decision is about. What I'm asking is, you can't choose him now Ana. We haven't spend time at all, for God's sake. We're supposed to be spending time on this evening. You should reconsider the choice, Ana. Oh, and do you want any drinks? Since we should talk about your decision that's made with only one side." He says with this annoyed look.

"No. No need for that. My decision has been made and the answer will be final. And a glass of white wine will be appreciated thanks." I say, looking at the view of London. Such a beautiful city.

"Can you at least reconsider that choice? I mean I was very confident that you'll choose me, but I don't know about it now. I mean you've just spend ur time with Edward and suddenly you came here saying you've made your decision." He says while opening a bottle of wine for me.

"Can you please at least hear my decision?Um.. my decision is, I... um.. I choose you." I say looking at him now. He's putting 2 glasses & a bottle of wine at the table with this shocked look.

"What? Are you not mistaken? Are you serious? Ana, do not joke about this. You are a serious matter for me and I won't accept any joke about this matter." He says while holding my face so I can see him and he can see me.

I'm nervous. He's looking straight to my eye. I'm feeling butterflies inside my stomach.

"I'm not. But if you really doesn't want me to have this decision, then sure. I'll think it over again." I say while hiding my smile.

"What are you saying now, Ana? Of course I want this decision to be real. This is what I've been waiting for years, Ana." He says with that super cute smile on his face.

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Author's note :

Hello guys!!
It's summer already!! :) Do you have any plans for summer? Mines visiting my sister in Beijing! I'm so excited omg!
And, I'm also so excited that this story will be finished soon!! I think 3-4 chapters left?
And please do give your thoughts about this chapter & don't forget to vote!
I love each of you!
Xx