When Time Runs Out

Chapter 23

Chapter 23 Timing was always the problem

Tumigil kami sa harap ng kotse niya. Naglakad siya papunta sa tabi ng driver's seat at binuksan ang pintuan para sumakay ako doon. I decided to push the thoughts running in my mind. Alam kong mali na nandito ako kasama siya kahit alam kong may girlfriend siya. I also know it's wrong to be with him but I decided to let him.. Let him break the remaining piece of me by hearing his reasons.

Pagpasok ko ay mabilis niya itong sinara at tumakbo para buksan ang pintuan sa driver's seat. Umupo ito doon at tumingin sa akin. Ngumiti siya at lumapit sa akin. I moved a bit backwards dahil akala ko ay kung ano ang gagawin niya. But he just fixed my seatbelt and I was watching him the whole time.

Hindi ko alam kong para saan ang ngiting iyon. Kung bakit niya ginawa iyon at kung bakit niya ginagawa lahat ito sa akin. If he plans to hurt me by doing all this things then he succeeded. I tried to recall if there was a time that I hurt him that might lead to why his doing this to me pero wala akong maalala. I heard him utter under his breath the word sorry. I don't know why he said it.

Maraming beses ko siyang narinig na sabihin iyon sa pananatili namin sa lugar na ito and again like those times I don't know why he said it. I never had any idea.

He started the engine and placed a casket tape on his player. Habang tumugtugtog ito ay napapalingon ako sa kanya. The song was sad and slow hindi mahilig si Xander makinig ng mga ganitong kanta. Kaya ako ang nag-adjust noon kaya nakahiligan ko ang rock music. So why? Was it because of her?

We were taking a familiar road. Dito kami dumaan ng umakyat kami sa isang hill. Pupunta ba kami doon?

My question was immediately answered ng tumigil kami malapit sa isang cliff. May nakaharang na hanggang baywang na mga sementong harang kung sakaling may madisgrasya na mga sasakyan dito.

I glanced at Xander to ask him why are we here. Because I find the whole place romantic. We're under the stars. The whole place was silent. The only thing that draws me back to that illusion is the reality that we are here because he's going to tell me something.

There's this part of me wishing we don't have to do this. Gusto ko siyang makita at makasama but the fact that we are here and he's about to say goodbye, I can't stand it. I wish I can call Scape and tell him to get me out of hear pero baka tulog na iyon ngayon.

I glanced at Xander. Hawak parin niya ang manibela. Kagaya ko siguro ay iniisip din niya kung ano ang susunod niyang gagawin.

"Tell me everything then Xander. Sabihin mo na lahat ng matapos na ito" I sounded brave but I know I'm not. Because at the end of the day I'm still one of those who are afraid to be left out.

Binuksan ko ang bintana para pumasok ang hangin. It was a cold breeze but it feels good. I let the air sips to my skin.

I was expecting him to talk but instead he opened the door beside him and go out. Naglakad siya papunta sa harap ng pintuan na nasa tabi ko. I was again expecting him to open the door. Pero sumandal lang siya sa tabi ng pintuan.

I don't know what he's thinking. Hindi ko din makita ang mukha niya. I wanted him to tell me everything. Kung maaari ay sinabi na niya kanina. I don't understand why we have to come here just to hear him tell me his reasons.

I've been in the saddest place. I've seen the loneliest girl in the mirror. But life had to be cruel to me. Because it pulled me out of that dark place only to experience hollowness and pain.

Narinig ko ang malalim niyang hininga at ang ilang beses niyang pag buntong hininga. He's still weighing everything. Ramdam kong hindi parin siya siguro kong sasabihin ba niya sa akin.