Virgin // Shawn Mendes [Wattys 2018]

CHAPTER 26

Lexi's p.o.v
I'm finally back home in New York. I can't wait to see Vale and mom. I missed them both so much. But I miss Shawn more than words can describe. Ugh I  need to stop thinking about him. Every time I do, it feels like my heart is being ripped out of my chest.

The elevator doors of to mom's apartment open. I see Vale and mom smiling. As soon as I meet eyes with them, I step out of the elevator with my bags. They run up to hug me. Ugh I missed this!

"It's so great to have you back my girl" my mom says hugging me.

"Boob to boob baby" Vale says and grabs to hug me. I miss her the most. Last time I was this close with someone I love, it was Shawn.

"It's so great to be back. I need to go to my room and unpack." I say before I can cry. I walk up the stairs to my room. I can feel Vale following me.

I get to my room and before I can close my door, Vale grabs it.

"Are you ok?" Right after she says that, I break. I fall to the ground in tears. She pulls me into a hug. In times like this, I only need my sister.

"No I'm not ok. I'm terrible. I miss him" I'm sobbing at this point.

"You'll see him again."

"No Vale. I won't. Because we broke up last night." She looks at me with shock written on her face.

"Oh babe. It's going to be ok." She says while rubbing my head.

"Hey listen. I'll unpack everything for you. You just lay down and get some rest."

"Thank you" I get up and walk to my bed. As soon as I hit the pillow, I'm out.

(This is the dream⬇️)

"Baby come on" he says

"Shawn where are we going"

"Some place very special" he takes the blindfold off. We're at the park where we had our first date.

"Awe" is all I can say.

"Well lets sit down"we go to sit down on the blanket. Ugh that smile makes my world light up! Those eyes sparkle every time I'm around him. Those things just make me fall in love with him more and more everyday. I want to say it but I don't know if I should. What if he doesn't feel the same way. Forget it. I can't tell him I'm in love with him. Not yet.

(End of dream)

I wake up from my sleep. The dream felt more like a flashback. I miss that day. It was the day I realized I was in love with him. There it is again. That pain in my chest.

I get up from my bed and go to the living room.

"Your meeting is in 3 hours Lex. Start getting ready soon" my mom says. I just woke up, now I have to get ready.

At the meeting⬇️

Time is going by so slow. I just want to go home and cry into my pillow.

"Lexi do you want to see the packaging for the makeup" agent April says. I nod. She hands me the eyeshadow palettes and I'm in complete awe. It's amazing to see something I created.

"The fans are going to love it!" I say so excited. I can't wait for this to hit the shelves in Ulta and Sephora!!!

"We will release the makeup in 2 weeks. In the meantime, get your fans excited! Let them know something big is coming!" April says.

Finally the meeting is over and I can leave. Everyone gets up from there seats. April tells me to stay seated. I'm so confused. Everyone is out of the room and April shuts the door. She walks over to the seat next to me and sits.

"I can tell something is bothering you. I'm not just your manager, I'm also your friend. You can tell me anything." I nod my head. It would feel good to get some things off my chest.

"Well last night, Shawn and I broke up. We won't see each other for months. He thought it was the best thing for us. I loved him. I still do love him. He was my first. My first boyfriend, my first kiss, my first love, and my first time. It hurts so much. I wish I could see him" I'm crying now. "I wish everything that I feel right now was not happening."

"I'm so sorry. Y'all seemed like a great couple. I'm so sorry. If you ever need someone to talk to. I'm here. Oh and this little conversation stays between us."

"Thank you" I pull her into a hug and with that, I get up and go into the hallway to find mom and Vale.

"What was that all about." Mom says

"April just wanted to tell me some more information on the makeup line."

"Ok"

We go downstairs, get to the car, and drive back home.

Finally we're back. I run up to my room. I just want to take a shower, take off my makeup and go to sleep.

I get into the shower and start washing my body. Hickeys are on my stomach and chest. I was his. He was mine. The sad part is, we could have made it work. He could have fought for me, but he didn't which means, I loved him more than he loved me.